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  • ADHD Is A Made Up Disease Says Mum

    ADHD is a made up disease says mum

    My little soldier is nine years old he’s called Jacob James.

    I always knew something was different about Jacob.

    He could never sit still, so easily distracted, barely slept, I was exhausted being his mum, but I was his mummy and I would do anything for him.

    At first I just thought James was a hyperactive energy filled boy.

    When James started School his teachers picked up on his lack of attention span and told me to see his Gp for a referral.

    After extensive tests, therapies and assessments he was finally diagnosed with ADHD.

    It was strange, I felt relieved finally there was a reason behind all his actions, finally I had more empathy and understanding.

    The school actioned a plan to help James whilst he was as school, I was feeling more hopeful and happy.

    That was until I told my mother “mum James has ADHD”.

    Now I wasn’t expecting the response I got from my sons nan my own mother:

    “ADHD are you kidding me, that boys just naughty, it’s a made up disease, no child in my school or when you were growing up had it, it’s purely bad parenting and lack of discipline, what that boy needs is a hard smack on the bottom”.

    Since getting his diagnosis I have seen more and more comments on social media and over heard people in the streets saying similar to my mother.

    ADHD diagnosis is not given lightly, a “naughty” child isn’t a child with ADHD.

    Attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) is a group of behavioural symptoms that include inattentiveness, hyperactivity and impulsiveness. Symptoms of ADHD tend to be noticed at an early age and may become more noticeable when a child’s circumstances change, such as when they start school.

    My child is not naughty he doesn’t need to be smacked or disciplined he needs understanding and help

    Find out more about ADHD here http://adhdsymptoms24.com/?m=1

    You may also like: http://mums-advice-old-copy.local/give-her-a-biscuit-so-shell-shut-the-hell-up-mums-advice-2/

     

  • Sex Toys Ruined My Parents Marriage

    Sex Toys Ruined My Parents Marriage

    My parents are in their early fifties and have been married for 30 blissful years.

    My parents had two children, myself and brother and are now proud grandparents to three.

    To look at you would think they had the perfect life, mortgage free, a loving family, lovely holidays abroad, nice cars and enough money for my father to only work part-time and my mother to stay home.

    This all went wrong last year and it’s all my fault.

    Christmas 2015 I brought my mum lots of Yankee candles, flowers, slippers, a giant toblerone, photos of her grandchildren placed in a beautiful silver frame and a joke present of a green rampant rabbit and ky jelly.

    It was meant in jest it was a never meant to be a marriage breaker, i thought my mum wold laugh and my dad would make a silly joke.

    My mother loved it, she stopped sleeping with my father, always saying she was tired or had a head ache, you know the go to excuses to get out of sex, her rampant rabbit was her new favourite toy, it completely replaced her husband.

    Six months of no sex for my father was too much, he tried talking with my mum, he tried to spice things up, but nothing worked, eventually he found love in a different place, my parents split and my father moved from our family home.

    My perfect family, my loving parents separated all over a joke.

    My mum said she’s never felt more free. My father had never pleased her in the bedroom department and she feels she has missed out for so long.

    My father still misses the woman he loves but has found comfort in another and things seem o be going well.

    I will never forgive myself for breaking up my parents but I’m glad both parties are happy.

     

  • A Day In The Life Of A Mum On Benefits

    A Day In The Life Of A Mum On Benefits

    I wake my children and prepare their breakfast, there is moans and tears as we don’t have the cereals they like, toast is all I can provide.

    My 9-year-old sobs as he has to have school dinner again, I cannot afford to do a packed lunch so he is forced to have the free school meal.

    My 5-year-old is sad that she doesn’t have a shopkins back pack like her friends.

    My 7 year has written his Christmas list: a set of real Lego and that is all he wants.

    Whilst my children are safe at school, I apply and apply for jobs but having no experience or qualifications no one is interest.

    I applied for McDonald’s, cleaning jobs literally everything and never get far.

    This week is my week to attend the job centre, I see my advisor and again she makes me feel like shit.

    I want to work, I want a chance at a better life but I cannot get a break.

    I’m classed as a dole scrounger or benefit whore, but I would work anywhere to get off of benefits.

    I am fed up of hearing how those on benefits are better off, each week I struggle to feed my family and pay my bills.

    There is nothing easy about being on benefits, the shame, embarrassment and the poverty, I wouldn’t wish it on my worst enemy.

    I never asked for this life, I was a kept woman, a house wife a mother, I did not ask for my partner of 13 years to leave me. But then again maybe it’s karma, I lived a fine life and took it for granted, I looked down on those on benefits and now I am walking in their shoes.

    One day some how I will find a way to hold my head high and say I am in paid employment, until then I shall keep fighting survive and keep on searching for a job.

    A Day In The Life Of A Mum On Benefits isn’t an easy one it isn’t hand outs and luxuries, its struggles, stress and tears.

    You may find this useful http://mums-advice-old-copy.local/benefits-explained/

     

  • My child is overweight My child is unhealthy

    My child is overweight My child is unhealthy

    My child’s diet needs to be changed and he needs to lose weight.
    Well according to his school any way, their little table of heights and weights puts my son close to being obese.

    My son is seven and a healthy active happy  boy, he attends football training three times a week and plays matches twice a week, he’s always in the garden, kicking a ball or on the trampoline or running around.

    He has one small chocolate bar twice a week, and four packets of crisps like wotsits or quavers four times a week.

    The majority of his meals are healthy and nutritious, he has his recommended five fruits and veg a day. 
    McDonald’s and take aways are a rare treat.
    But no my active “skinny” boy is verging on obese and we wonder why our children grow up with body confidence issues and are consumed with worry over their figure and diet.

    My child is overweight My child is unhealthy
    My child is overweight My child is unhealthy

    Now I understand that being healthy is important but shaming and scaring children because of a chart on someone’s computer is ridiculous.

    I mean seriously have they looked at my child, there isn’t an ounce of “fat on him”.
    Girls especially grow up thinking they are fat or ugly and these charts and warnings at a young age does them no good at all and could be a factor in eating disorders in later life.
    What seven-year old wants to hear they’re fat, unhealthy and need to lose weight. 

    They even suggested that if we didn’t nip this in the bud now he is likely to be overweight as  an adult, have health problems like type 2 diabetes or heart problems.

    It is time the board of education stopped ticking boxes on a computer and actually look at our children.

    My child is overweight My child is unhealthy
    My child is overweight My child is unhealthy

     

     

  • Teachers Stop Harrassing Girls In Tight Trousers

    Parents have slammed a school’s clampdown on female pupils’ “tight” trousers it claims are “distracting teachers”.

    One furious mum collected over 200 signatures for a petition to get staff to “stop harassing” girls and punishing them for not wearing “baggy” school wear.

    Amy Moule, 37, said her 15-year-old daughter Beth is frequently sent to detention as part of a “ridiculous” ban on how tight girls’ trousers should be.

    The headteacher at St Peter’s School, Huntingdon, said it expected pupils to wear “professional attire” and only a minority of parents had objected to its policy.
    Ms Moule said her daughter and others were told their clothing was “distracting teachers and students”.

    The furore around the school dress policy erupted after girls’ tight trousers – which for years were acceptable – were suddenly banned.
    Ms Moule, from Huntingdon, refused to buy the new trousers even after teachers started doling out detention punishments.

    The furore around the school dress policy erupted after girls’ tight trousers – which for years were acceptable – were suddenly banned.
    Ms Moule, from Huntingdon, refused to buy the new trousers even after teachers started doling out detention punishments.

    She claimed that only about one in ten girls at the school were wearing the “baggy” trousers recommended by the school following the change brought in this school term.
    “The majority of them are wearing the same trousers – there’s very few that aren’t,” she said.
    “I would say only 10 per cent are wearing the school trousers. The rest are wearing tight trousers which the school aren’t happy with.
    “It’s just a wasteful ethos. My daughter has been in a few detentions and I’ve said she cannot do them because I’m not changing the trousers as I don’t have enough money to do that.”

    Ms Moule claimed her daughter was being “victimized” by teachers and that the resulting stress had affected her GCSE mock exam grades.
    “It’s stressed the girls out,” she explained. “They’ve got really stressed out at having to do this and have all these detentions and how they are going to keep getting detentions until they change these trousers.
    “Beth told me and it infuriated me, I phoned up the school.
    “[The head] says they not acceptable and they are leggings – I don’t think they are leggings at all.”

    She branded head teacher Christopher Bennet as “old-fashioned” and claimed he did not know the difference between girls’ “leggings” and formal trousers, saying: “I don’t think he does.
    “It’s ridiculous isn’t it? It’s a matter of perception and he’s perceiving them to be.”
    Dad Melvin Bream, 40, of Huntingdon, whose 12-year-old and 15-year-old daughters have been affected by the policy change, said: “It’s a load of rubbish. I feel that the uniform is too ‘correct’.
    “I’ve had the kids not want to come to school because of it. I don’t think they overtight, no, I think they should be allowed ‘tight’ trousers.
    “The school has clamped down on it and the girls are getting detentions for it for no reason.”

    Paula Lloyd-Northrop, 47, has told her twin 15-year-old girls not to go to detentions after they got one every day of the week for wearing “skinny” trousers.
    She said: “They’ve got something like three-and-a-half months actually left in school to do education for GCSEs and they are clamping right down yet they’ve worn their brand of trousers for the last five years.
    “It’s just crazy at the minute because they’ve got their GCSEs – I think they should allow any child to wear whatever trousers they want as long as it’s smart.”

    Headteacher Christopher Bennet said “we expect professional attire” and claims only 25 out of the 1,002 pupils at his school were affected by the uniform change.
    He said a minority of parents had taken issue with the policy and a letter with an image of what was “acceptable” and “not acceptable” girl’s trousers had been sent to parents over the summer holidays.
    “It is all about expectation,” he added. “Some girls are coming in in leggings.”

  • Shocking Photo Shows Why Rear Facing Is Best

    A car seat safety blogger has shared a shocking photo online, warning parents not to jump into using a high-backed booster for their little ones too soon.

    The Facebook page, The ERF Mission. A Rear Facing Family, shared a photo at the beginning of the year that shows severe bruising on an adult’s body after a collission, caused by a seat belt.
    The picture was used to highlight why children should stay in rear-facing car seats which use a harness for restraint, rather than a seat belt, for as long as possible.

    Shocking Photo Shows Why Rear Facing Is Best
    Shocking Photo Shows Why Rear Facing Is Best

    Legally in the UK, children over 15kg (the weight of the average three-year-old) had been allowed to travel in a backless booster seat, BUT from March 2017 this year, only children OVER 125cm and weighing more than 22kg are be able to travel using one.
    This raises the age for children using backless booster seats to around six to eight years old.

    All booster seats (including high-backed models) use seat belts to hold a child in place, and do provide adequate protection.
    But this warning says parents shouldn’t rush to move their kids out of their rear-facing seats until absolutely necessary, as they are ‘far safer’.
    But, the post clearly states at the beginning:
    ‘Everyone needs to wear a seat belt – that is a given fact! Seat belts saves lives!’
    Although the photograph shows bruising and cuts from a seat belt, the post makes it clear that seat belts are vital and must be worn in vehicles.
    Think twice’

    ‘This is what can happen to you with a seat belt – an adult.

    ‘The focus is to try and prevent parents/carers/childminders to put children into an adult seat belt before they are old enough.
    ‘Far too many jump to a HBB the moment the child hits the minimum weight limit for example,’ said the unnamed blogger.
    ‘So what I am trying to do – is show that this is the injury inflicted on an adult – so with that knowledge in the back of your mind – maybe it will make you think twice before you decide to jump to the high back booster or just a seat belt on your child – as a rear facing car seat would never do this to the child.’
    As rear-facing car seats use a harness, the car seat safety blogger has advised parents not to make the move to high-backed boosters, which use seat belts to strap the child in, until needed:
    ‘So wait as long as possible before you take that last step – the high back booster,’ the blogger wrote.
    ‘The children are far safer rear facing for as long as possible.’
    Advice
    Keep your child rear facing for as long as possible, then switch to a high-backed booster once they’ve outgrown their Group 1 rear-facing seat. High-backed boosters are still a safe method of transporting your child, but better used for children aged four plus.

    Click here for the laws on car seats https://www.gov.uk/child-car-seats-the-rules

     

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  • Teach Your Children Bullying Can Lead To This

    All decent parents hope their children are kind to others, even to children they may not like. But still, many children and teens (and even adults) end up victims of rude or mean comments, or even bullying.
    The consequences of bullying can be depression or  even leading to suicide or self-harm by the victim.

    Anti-bullying plea
    One mum is speaking out, pleading with parents to not only monitor the way their kids are using smartphones and tablets, but to also teach them empathy after her daughter ended up hospitalized as a result of bullying.
    In a Facebook post, she writes: “Our beautiful girl has been subjected to some awful bullying at school. It’s been a very private 7 months for us, dealing with this, immediate family only.

    “In this age of social media, children (because they are children) think it’s ok to send hateful messages (to me also along with their parents who won’t take responsibility) without consequences. I’ve had calls from these children calling me an old hag because I’ve defended our daughter, approached parents and pleaded with them to talk with their children and ask them to stop. I’ve even approached the children themselves, but been threatened by parents with harassment.”

    The department of education in America doesn’t expel children from schools for bullying, as they say: ‘Every child is entitled to an education.’

    What about our child’s entitlement?

    She’s been sent home numerous times after self harming at school. She’s not allowed a pencil sharpener as she takes the blade out and cuts herself.

    The department of education also told me: ‘You should teach your child how to be resilient against bullies.’ Yes, they said that.

    Our girl has had a video taken of her sitting at her desk at school, legs slightly open, with a lovely caption about the smell. It was posted to snapchat. I spent 90 mins with the police as they tried to determine if it was photographing and distribution of pornographic material. Yes, a 12 year old can be prosecuted if the content breaches certain criteria. Sadly our daughter’s didn’t, but she was subjected to weeks of ridicule. Repercussions? The girl who posted the video lost her playtime. The person who took the video? Nothing, because no one would tell who it was.

    It’s ok to verbally attack at school because they can get away with it via a screen; so think the same will happen in the real world.

    Last week, we spent over 5 hours in A&E with psychiatrists, doctors and nurses, because our girl ‘had a plan to commit suicide’. On Tuesday, I am in court applying for a VRO against a 12 year old to keep her (the bully) away from our beautiful girl—all because parents don’t accept responsibility for their children and schools can only do so much.
    “Our beautiful girl has been subjected to some awful bullying at school. It’s been a very private 7 months for us, dealing with this, immediate family only.

    The school has a safety plan for the bullied child, our daughter. And the bully? She only loses break and lunch privileges. This is infant school punishment!

    Please, in this awful age of social media (or anti social media as we call it) check your children’s messages. Their devices are a privilege, nothing more, nothing less, so please make sure they are being polite and respectful in their messages. Teach the children to ‘talk’ not use text or social media to air their differences.

    Bullying affects the whole family, not just the bullied. It needs to stop and it needs to stop now! Please feel free to share.”

    She further explains that not only have parents been non-receptive to her pleas, but the school has done little to curb the problem. Her daughter has been self-harming as a result of the ongoing bullying, which often occurs through social media via smartphones.

    The problem with smartphones and social media
    The world has become a different place over the last ten years. Most kids have a smartphone— and are still learning appropriate behavior versus inappropriate behavior. It’s easier to type on a computer or into a smartphone something mean to someone than it is to say it in person.

    Hiding behind a screen can give a false sense of power over another person. Kids are not yet mature enough to consider the repercussions of saying cruel and hateful things to another person via their smartphone.
    Teens tend to gang up on one person and band together in their cruelty.

    Parents must monitor and teach children
    If your child has a smartphone and/or social media accounts, it’s your responsibility to monitor what your child is saying to other people and what is being said back. Is your child bullying someone else? Are they being bullied? If the answer is yes, you must take action to stop it. Besides bullying, there is major concerns about sexting and sending pornography in texts or through apps.

    If your child is using social media and smartphones to make bad choices, you need to work to teach them what is and is not acceptable behavior. Set up consequences and follow through. Does that mean losing smartphone privileges for a short time or longer period? Do other restrictions need to be set up? Do they need to apologize to another person for things they have said or done? Follow through and be firm.
    Empathy

    Some children naturally have empathy, others must be taught. If your child is hurting others, try asking them how they’d feel in the reverse situation— were they are on the receiving end of bullying. Try to help them see how what they say or do can affect others and how it can hurt them. Help them set up ways they can show more kindness and empathy to others outside their social circles, such as finding those who need a friend or sticking up for someone who is being bullied.

     

     

  • One Reason Why You Can’t Sleep At Night

    After a stressful or busy day, there is nothing better than lounging on the sofa and bingeing your favourite TV show. However, if you want a good night’s sleep, you might want to rethink your favorite habit.

    A study in the Journal of Clinical Sleep Medicine found that binge-watching is linked to poor sleep quality, fatigue and increased insomnia. Researchers say when you binge-watch your favourite TV show, you become emotionally invested in the show. You want to know what happens next, how the characters develop, how everything plays out. These feelings make you more alert and can make it harder for you to calm down and fall asleep at night.

    1. Invest in a good mattress
    Mattresses vary drastically and to get the right one for you, you need to find products designed for your sleep position, personal preference, body weight and sleeping arrangements (if you sleep with a spouse and/or animals). Not only should you invest in a proper mattress, you also need a strong foundation and one designed for your specific mattress. Do extensive research before purchasing a mattress to ensure it has everything you need to get a proper night’s sleep.

    2. Keep your room cool
    The recommended temperature for your bedroom is between 60 to 67 degrees. This helps you sleep cool and prevents excess sweat and heat from disrupting your sleep cycles.

    3. Avoid naps or excess sleep at night
    While naps can be great to increase your energy, it can also make sleeping at night extremely hard. If you choose to nap, make it short and take one early in the afternoon. Additionally, avoid sleeping in several hours past your normal wake-up time. When you wake up late in the day, your body’s natural sleep schedule is thrown off, making it difficult to get more sleep.

    4. Diary
    Many individuals complain that they can’t sleep due to a racing mind. They lay down and can’t shut off their mind or they wake up, stressed and anxious about various items taking place in their lives. One way to minimize this anxiety and stress is to journal every night before going to bed. Basically, do a major brain dump every night and write about your day, your anxieties, worries, upcoming activities, to-do lists, etc. Get everything down on paper so you have less information swarming around through your mind during the night.

    While watching your favourite TV show isn’t a bad thing, be mindful of how this one simple action can be wreaking havoc on your health.

     

  • Vunerable Lady Left In A Poor State In Carehome

     Josh Meszaros has taken to Social media to share his hurt and disgust at his mothers care.

    Josh said:

    So I popped in to the care home to see mum earlier on the way to the hospital to see dad.. What I found when I went in was absolutely disgraceful. 

    Went into mums room at 5:50 to find her sat in her chair in the dark, no lights on at all, and the TV turned off. This is bad enough, yet it gets worse..

    Vunerable Lady Left In A Poor State In Carehome

    She is sat like this with her evening meal and drink in front of her, unaccompanied when every single member of staff is fully aware that she is at serious risk of choking on food and drink. They have been told this numerous times, yet still ignore it. 

    She didn’t look right in herself at all, disoriented and looked worried. 

    Vunerable Lady Left In A Poor State In CarehomeVunerable Lady Left In A Poor State In CarehomeVunerable Lady Left In A Poor State In Carehome

    She was soaking wet throughout, to even her leggings being soaked, so she had certainly been left like this for a substantial amount of time. Then I found that whatever ‘carer’ had changed her earlier in the day had put her pad on the wrong way round. It is made a certain shape so almost impossible to get wrong!

    I ended up having to shower her myself, at which point it had been an hour since I had got there and still no one had come to check on her and make sure that she hadn’t choked. She had no soap or shower gel in there so what the hell have they been using to shower her with? I noticed some bed sores which are due to the carers leaving her sat in her own piss and shit for extortionate amounts of time, this can lead to Sepsis and can be deadly.

    Again, they have been told about this many times and still ignore it. They try to blame it on the pads yet she had not once got sore at home so how can it be down to the pads?  

    There was a little cup on the shelf above her bed with tablets in, god knows how long it had been there for. What if another resident had walked in and taken them, or if mum had managed to reach and take them? This could have been a lot more serious and potentially involve a death. 

      Again, they have been using the Sara Steady which was obvious with it being left next to her bed, every single member of staff has been told by Dad and also by the Social Worker, not to use this for transfers and to use her walker instead to keep transfers consistent each time. Again, it gets ignored and because if that she has lost more mobility and independence. 

    Vunerable Lady Left In A Poor State In Carehome

    Oh, and the bloody stupid handrail next to the toilet in the bathroom.. how the hell can that even be useful to a client? It’s about 1ft too bloody low! I stood up and it was too low for me to reach, fucking ridiculous. 

     Eventually the person in charge decided to come to talk to me about my concerns, to which they she said that she had been extremely busy and had to deal with 3 or 4 falls, she tried to say that she had been sat with mum earlier when she first had her food and said that mum would back her up? So let me get this straight, you’re trying to say that a 48-year-old woman with MS, Dementia, and Advanced Cognitive Impairment who often does not recognise her own children will have the mental capacity to correctly back you up?!

    Of course I can understand that they have had apparently a busy day, but if the staff cannot deal with the workload then surely they should cut back on the amount of clients, or employ more people. 2 carers to 15 clients is a complete joke. They will listen to complains, but not document anything or make any changes whatsoever. Think it’s about time they sorted themselves out before they all seriously regret it!
     

    I can now safely confirm that this Care Home is Whittington House Nursing Home Cheltenham. We have decided that it is now appropriate to publicly name the home as the manager has now resorted to retaliating to the below safeguarding concerns and complaints by using ‘Tit For Tat’ tactics attempting to cause trouble between us and the social worker, who is in fact fantastic at her job and a very decent person, so these petty tactics have not worked. 

    https://www.facebook.com/WhittingtonHouse/
     

     

     

  • Elderly Man In Critical Condition After Saving Woman

    An elderly man is in a critical condition after falling ill whilst attempting to save a woman he believed was in danger and  being assaulted by a middle-aged male in a busy town.

    Just before 8pm on Thursday the 9th of November, a member of the public went to the aid of a woman after reportedly seeing a middle-aged man trying to force her into a car in a high Street in Colchester Essex.
    While reporting the incident to the police, the man in his 60s suffered a serious medical episode.
    It is believed to have been a heart attack.

    Police Officers and ambulance crew  attended and a privacy screen was put in place for a short period of time close to local pubs and shops, whilst paramedics worked on the have a go hero.

    The ambulance crew transported the elderly man to the local hospital in Colchester where he remains in a critical condition, surrounded by his loved ones.

    A spokesman for the East of England Ambulance Service Trust told local reporters: “We received an emergency 999 call to High Street Colchester at 8.05pm after reports of a male collapsing.
    “Two ambulances, an ambulance car and a community first responder were sent.
    “On arrival they treated a male who had been taken unwell, he was taken to Colchester General Hospital for further treatment.”

    Police Officers later arrested a fourty four year old man on suspicion of assaulting a woman and he remains in custody, all thanks to this have a go hero who did the right thing. 
    Investigations are still ongoing.

    We hope this man makes a speedy recovery, he may well have saved this ladies life or prevented a rape or violent attack , heroes come in all shapes,colours, sizes and ages, in our eyes he is a true gentleman and hero.