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Mom A: “My house is on fire and my child is inside screaming. What do I do?! Picture for attention!”

Mom B: “Try changing his diet. We cut out everything except kale and it’s done wonders for our kids.”

Mom C: “Essential oils. Unrelated: I sell them.”

Mom D: “He’s fine. Helicopter moms ugh. I didn’t even use a car seat when I was a kid and I’m fine! 🙄”

Mom E: “He’s NOT FINE. My friend’s sister’s 2nd cousin had this happen and it was cancer. Google it!”

Mom F: “I’m a realtor and I’d love to help you find a new home!”

Mom G: “SAVE YOUR CHILD WHY ARE YOU ASKING STRANGERS ON THE INTERNET?!”

Mom H: “Rude ^ Have you tried separating the child from the fire?

Mom I: “Squirt some breastmilk on your child. Breastmilk cures everything”

Mom J: “Since there’s so many ppl commenting here, can you tell me if this preg test is positive?! I’m only 2 days post ovulation but my boobs are sore and I’m nauseous”

Mom K: “I think there’s more to the story that you aren’t telling us. Please tell us your story from when you were born till now so we can evaluate your life and show you where you went wrong”

Mom L: “has he had his fire vaccinations yet? That will herd immunity protect him from the flames.”

Mom M: “I wish death upon you!^ How dare you believe in science and expose your child to heavy metals, autism, and ignorance by suggesting fire vaccinations!! Have you not seen Vaxxed?”

Mom N: just put some coconut oil on it!

Mom O: just latch him on demand to increase supply, lots of skin to skin.

Mom P: have you considered CIO? We tried it during the last fire and he only cried for 10 minutes. Hasn’t complained since.

Mom Q: I would NEVER let my child CIO. He is 16 years old and has never cried his whole life, not even for a minute. We still bed share and he nurses on demand 4-5 times a night.

Mom R: Did you have him evaluated for lip/tongue ties? I had my LO’s revised last week and it has made a huge difference in his screaming.

Mom S: Is he formula fed? The formula companies don’t want you to know that formula causes house fires. They work with the insurance companies, so it’s really your fault that the house is on fire and he’s screaming. I would NEVER feed that poison to my child.

Mom T: sometimes when you’re feeling overwhelmed just walk away. Come back when you’ve had a chance to breathe.

Mom U: Strip him down to just diaper. He’s probably too warm! If his rectal temp is 100.4 he needs to go to the ER immediately!

Mom V: “Are you looking for a work from home option? Maybe if you were home with your child more you could’ve prevented the fire. Sending PM”

Mom W: Don’t listen to any of this! Follow your mom gut! You’re a great mom!

Mom X: let go and let God

Mom Y: don’t stress. When he gets too hot, he’ll come out on his own.

Mom Z: Girl use this alone time to get your hair done or go on a date night!

Credit https://www.facebook.com/KimberlyDean43

October 7, 2019
Dear Kids I’m Sorry I Was A Jerk

Dear Kids, I’m sorry I was a jerk.

I wish you knew that sometimes when the house is dark and quiet, I come in and watch you breathe for a minute. I wonder there in the stillness if you know how much I love you. I think about the things I could have said differently, and I wonder if you let my mistakes roll off of you or if they stuck. I hope and pray there in the stillness that you would know how deeply and widely I love you.

You saw me at my best today, and you saw me at my worst. We cuddled on the couch this morning and your bed head was pressed into my chest. I smelled your hair and whispered I love you. I also lectured you about LISTENING and NOT INTERRUPTING, and was way grumpier than I needed to be. Later, I laid on your bed and apologized for being a jerk.

You’ve seen me in all my colors and I have no facades with you. I am just one mess of a Mama that apologizes often and loves you with every fiber of my being.

I don’t really know what I’m doing. I wish I did, but I don’t. I do my best and I trust my gut, but sometimes I make mistakes. Sometimes I say things that shouldn’t be said. Please keep telling me when I hurt you and I will make it right. We are learning and growing together.

Sometimes I can’t find the words to let you know how I feel about you. I want to, but I can’t.

Though sometimes I am overwhelmed and stressed I wish I could push pause and keep these days forever and ever.

I am proud of you. I tell you that, but I know you don’t fully understand what that means yet. I’m proud of you in a way that doesn’t depend on your successes or failures. I’m proud of who you are and I will always be your greatest fan…no matter what.

I hope my imperfection gives you permission to be imperfect too. I hope you always let me see your flaws and your mistakes because you know I’m safe. I hope you never hesitate to tell me when you’ve screwed up, because this imperfect mama will love you no matter what.

My love will wrap itself around you whether you want it or not. There’s nothing you could ever do that would make it stop. Not ever.

I am yours.

We’re in this together for the long haul my loves, and there’s nowhere I’d rather be than here.

I love you.

Love,

Mama

Follow Jess of Wonderoak for more like this.https://www.facebook.com/wonderoak/

September 30, 2019
I’m The Mum Who Sits Alone At Play Places

I’m the mom who sits alone at play places, but doesn’t want to. But anxiety makes me that way.

I’m the mom who won’t come up and talk to you first at our kids school, because my brain has convinced me that you don’t want to hear from me.

I’m the mom that sits by myself while my kids play at play places, listening to other moms talk. Agreeing with what they’re saying, even wanting to join in on the conversation. But I won’t. Because my brain tells me you don’t want me to. Or what I would say, would be weird to you.

I’m the mom who when my child asks me to talk to their friends mom at school, so they can have a play date, I will make excuses as to why I can’t.

I’m the mom who want to go out more way more with my four year old, but my fear of him having a tantrum that I can’t control, takes over.

I’m the mom who wants to be the PAC mom at school, who is friends with all the other moms. But I can barely muster up a “hello good morning!” to you.

I’m the mom who wants to volunteer in my kids class for hot lunch day, for field trips, and all that fun stuff. But my mind reminds me about the room full of strangers I would have to introduce myself to.

I’m the mom who’s trying.

I’m the mom with anxiety.

Follow me, the anxious momma, on instagram 🤣 https://www.facebook.com/caitlin.fladager

September 30, 2019
I Sucked Ass At Being A Mum Today

I sucked ass at being a mom today. Some days, I feel like I’m not doing a good job at this mom thing. Because it’s so fucking hard. I know, I know, it’s always worth it, and I love my kids. But man, when did it get so hard?

Today I yelled too much at them, they watched too much tv, I fed them pasta, which they glazed over, picking out most of the nutrients.

I yelled at them to stop yelling (funny huh?), I told my son to stop calling his sister “poopy head” at least thirty times today. Something I never thought I would be doing. ⁣

As I write this caption, I am sitting on my bedroom floor. Hiding. Trying to get a moment of silence. It’s so hard some days. And I know I’m not alone.

There’s no “silver lining” to this post.

Being a mom is fucking hard.

That’s all.

Everyday, I tell myself “tomorrow! Tomorrow will be the day I don’t yell. Tomorrow will be the day I talk calmly all day to them. Tomorrow will be the day they won’t fight with each other. Tomorrow. Tomorrow will be better. Easier.” ⁣

And whenever I lay them down to bed at night, I look at those beautiful souls I created and think “how could I ever be so mad at them?” It’s a routine I have had for the past few years now.

Being a mom is fucking hard. And I suck at it a lot of the time. But that’s okay, because I’m trying my best to raise good, kind, decent, loving human beings, in a world so cold. ⁣

There’s no way that’s going to be easy.

Keep going mama, we got this. Even if we fucking suck some times.

Instagram – Caitlinfladager

September 23, 2019
This Cheap Little Bag Stole My Sons Life

MDMA

Cheaper than alcohol and far too easy to get hold of. It’s on every street and I’ve only just found out that most kids are taking it. They don’t even bother trying to get alcohol now, if they do it’s a ‘bonus’

Well this lovely little bag of white that cost around a tenner nearly cost my son his life. My son who turned 14 at the beginning of the month, who I’d never have even thought would even consider being so stupid. My son who went out with ‘friends’ – friends of which left him to die on a cold wet pavement all alone when it started to get serious.

I received a phone call from a stranger who had used his phone to call me, a lovely lady called Jane who had been driving past and saw my baby boy convulsing so severely he’s lucky he didn’t crack his skull. It took several grown adults to pin him down to prevent injury whilst keeping his airways clear and fetching blankets and duvets until I could get there.

I watched him as he turned blue in the back of the ambulance, I watched as he was put to sleep in intensive care to prevent any further damage, I watched as machines had to do his breathing for him. I watched the look of desperation on my mums face, pleading with the doctors to tell her her grandson would live. ….

….. he did, he’s alive, there’s no lasting injuries just the memory of that night. Thank God!

But as for his friends….. there are no words, well there are but il refrain. How dare anyone, let alone a friend leave someone, so young, so vulnerable, so close to death-so alone? I bet you all went back to your own warm beds and planned your next night out on ‘magic’

Credit https://www.facebook.com/Michael-fogg-Family-Funeral-Directors-506495719478513/

September 23, 2019
I Will Not Be Working To Get My Body Back

“No, no, you have it wrong, I will not be working to get my body back.

She was never lost.

She was here, giving every moment and detail to this sweet baby.

She was pushed and exhausted, stretched and stripped to make space for a new life.

Please stand back and aside.

For her sacrifice she will not be scrutinized.

She will be loved, and thanked and bowed down to.

She will be allowed her time to heal and be settled into.

This body’s work will not be forgotten, hidden or erased.

And if you feel it should, you understand nothing about the gift she has given.

No, no Body don’t listen. Because I see you. I thank you deeply. You did so good.”

Tag a new mama.❤️

Words @mia_carr_ of Snuggle Me Organic

Pic Alli Upham

September 23, 2019
I Had To Make A Choice Between Being A Mum Or A…

Yesterday Molly over heard me saying that I was competing in my first track race in 6 years.

She asked me why, and asked “is it because of me?”

I answered honestly, and said, “well, Yes.”

Her little face dropped and she appolgied.

I then stroked her hair and said, “When you were younger we had to move out of Nannys house.

It got too difficult being a single mama and trying to train for running so much, if your Dad was around it might have been different… but because it’s just me, I basically had to choose.

I had to make a choice between being the best Mummy I could be, or being the best runner I could be.

And I chose you.

I’ll always choose you.

Because you are my priority.

You are the most important person and “thing” to me…

I love running, you know I do, but I love you so much more.”

Molly’s face lit up, she told me she loved me and she grabbed me in a big cuddle. 💗

I continued, “So it’s not your fault at all.

And you don’t need to apologise to me.

I’m not upset or mad at you in any way.

It’s been such an amazing gift to be your Mummy, and I wouldn’t change it.

And now your older I can get back into running a bit anyway!”

Molly then jumped in and said, “And I want to help you get to run!”

I thanked her and we had the biggest cuddle.

Then she lay her head down on my lap as I stroked her hair.

She looked so content and warm inside.

Reminded that she is important and loved.

I do love running, but I love Molly more.

And I’m glad she knows it. ♡

**Picture: left, 2013 County Champs

Picture: Right, 2019 County Champs**

Credit https://www.facebook.com/rhiannon.v.griffin

September 10, 2019
Today I Licked My Childs Butt Ice Cream

Y’ALL!!!! I am DONE with these kids!! I learned a hard lesson today…one I wasn’t prepared for and I feel like I’ve been through a trauma! I need prayer! 🤦🏼‍♀️😵💩

I got Blakely an ice cream cone (yes the McDonald’s machine was working🤷🏼‍♀️). Well she walks into the living room and hands me her cone (half eaten like everything I give her) and I know all you moms have been there. We as moms pretty much live off of the food our kids don’t eat so I licked it before it dripped. I notice she is standing there looking at me like this 👉🏼😐.

I ask her: “what’s wrong?”

And she says: “Is it okay?!”

🥺😳😨🤭

At this point I’m scared b/c I don’t know what just happened. I think maybe she dropped it in her room and was scared to say. We stand there looking at each other and the ice cream cone. And this fool says: “I accidentally wiped my butt with it”

🤢🤢😳😵🤭🤭

Excuse me?!! With this ice cream cone I just licked?! Wtf!! I am coming unglued…so I ask this child “How do you accidentally wipe your butt with an ice cream and WHY did you give it to me to eat????” 😳😑🤐

She looks me dead in my face and says “I used the wrong hand to wipe but it was just pee mommy”

🤮✌🏼✌🏽🤯

DONE! Someone come get these kids. I cannot even handle it. If y’all need me I’ll be washing my mouth out with Clorox. 🤦🏼‍♀️🤦🏼‍♀️😒

#kidsareassholes #whytho #shesaiditwasjustpee #allmylifeihadtostruggle #parentinglol #icecreamfail #mommyfail #4yroldproblems #neveragain

Credit https://www.facebook.com/firewifemomlife/

August 25, 2019
Today I Didn’t Like Being A Mum I Yelled More Than I Loved

Today, I didn’t like being a mom.

Today, I yelled more than I loved.

Today, I cried.

Today, my kids picked on each other all day.

Today, I don’t remember smiling.

Today, I don’t remember laughing.

Today, I wanted to pack up and go sit on a beach with a cold drink completely alone.

Today, I didn’t want to be around my kids.

Today, I didn’t like my kids, but that doesn’t mean I don’t love them.

Today, the mom guilt is more than I’ve ever felt in all 11 years of parenting.

A toddler who got me up at 4:45am, then fought for an hour for a nap.

A hormonal pre teen who is trying to navigate his new found emotions.

So, I’m going to lay here, drink my mine, maybe cry some more, and hope tomorrow is better.

I’ll pray for more patience, a calmer heart, and a good nights sleep.

I want moms to know they aren’t alone. It’s ok to want time away from your kids. It’s ok if you snuck to the bathroom to cry. It’s ok if you can’t wait for bedtime.

Stop making moms feel they need to love every second of every day of motherhood, because they don’t.

It’s hard. It’s so freaking hard.

So, cheers to you mama, (or dad) I’ll just be laying here, regretting how much I yelled today, and strive to better tomorrow.

Credit https://www.facebook.com/brandi.mathena

August 25, 2019
Mum Delivers Massive Baby At Home

YOU CAN DO BIG THINGS! Like push a 14 lb 7 oz baby out naturally with NO VAGINAL TEARING! 4 hours of labor, 15 mins of pushing. ✨Rockstar✨

You rock Coastal Midwifery!

“A few days ago I had the pleasure of attending the beautiful HOME BIRTH of this BIG man.

His mama saw a Licensed midwife throughout her pregnancy and prepared physically and emotionally for the birth of her second baby.

During her 4 hour long labor she rocked, walked and danced her baby down, she instinctively pushed in the standing position for 15 mins and delivered all….. are you ready for it…. 14 lbs 7oz of him! She was also able to deliver this chunky baby with no tears.

After doing their research this family chose a midwife to guide them through their pregnancy and birth and were able to have an amazing experience in the comfort of their own home.

This baby stayed with his mama on her chest breastfed within the first hour. Mama and baby are doing amazing.

People are capable of delivering their baby, even when they are big! Way to go mama!”

You can find more info here:

https://evidencebasedbirth.com/evidence-for-induction-or-c-section-for-big-baby/

August 11, 2019