***Warning: Graphic Images***
I have NEVER shared these before. I’m not sure I ever intended to. This is extremely hard for me in so many ways. However, too many people are dying. I have friends who need to see this. It goes beyond what my words can accomplish. This is by far, the most raw thing I have shared with the world. Please read. Please share.
My name is Melissa, and I’m an addict. I have been clean and in recovery for just about a year and five months. Below, you will find extremely disturbing images of me while in active addiction. This was what I looked like, daily, for years. This is what my husband dealt with. This is what my little girls walked in on. This is what my family and friends saw, on the rare occasions I left the house. I was SICK. I was DYING. I was so far gone I thought I could NEVER recover. I was so lost I couldn’t imagine a life without using. I just wanted to die. I didn’t realize I was hardly alive.
If you are currently in active addiction, this is my plea to you. Look at these pictures. Images of a dead girl. A needle junkie with a habit so fierce she spent days and nights in a self induced coma on her bathroom floor. A girl who would spend every cent on dope and forget she had kids to feed and take care of. A girl who lost every single thing she ever had. A girl who was so sick she thought she would never ever find a way out, until she did.
If you are reading this and are going through the same pain I did, I am begging you to reach out. I died more than once. I have now found life. I promise you, there is HOPE. There is recovery. There is freedom and serenity and you are worthy of it.
Please, please reach out. You do not have to suffer any longer. You are not alone. Just reach out your hand, I’m right here.
My name is Melissa. I am a RECOVERED addict. Share with me your darkness, and I’ll lead you towards the light. I love you all đđđ
Melissa.lee.matos@gmail.com
304-917-6284
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#ChooseFreedom #wedorecover #pleasereachout #yourneveralone #RecoverME
The Drs and midwives resuscitated her and she seemed to be ok I throughout the day.. To a new first time mum I just thought it was normal and had no idea she was really severely ill.
Throughout the day she wouldn’t feed, didn’t wake unless midwives stripped her, she was very swollen, purple and was breathing too fast – however midwives and I were reassured it could be because she wasn’t breathing at birth.
She was taken for a chest X-ray, multiple blood tests, oxygen pumped into an incubator and a lumbar puncture, she was so poorly my baby didn’t even cry when a large needle was placed into her spinal cord.. She just fell asleep on the nurses hand.. That really breaks my heart.
I remember sitting with her, reading stories but being interrupted by the beeping of machines, the noses that never leave you. I remember being aloud to hold her, but being caught up in wires instead. I remember learning to feed my baby girl through an NG tube instead of with a bottle like all my friends could with their babies.
I didn’t feel like she was mine, from the second she was born being whisked off to save her life and then just a few short hours later being taken again.. But after that I felt free and at peace.
The websites for all information on sepsis and GBS are here, please do some research & learn the symptoms of sepsis, getting help as soon as possible is what will potentially save a life.
My son Riley passed away aged 4, 13 months ago he had been playing in the pool with his uncle Paul who was 15 at the time, his uncle left my son unattended for a matter of minutes to use the bathroom.
This is a poem I have written to my brother and son, he made a mistake, he isn’t to blame, we all forgive him, but he can’t forgive himself.
I have so many things to tell you, that I don’t know how to say.
So many things are happening and things are changing everyday.
Something’s are getting better, and others just getting worse, everything is changing and everyone is hurt.
I am always hurting, I always seem to cry, everyone is leaving and don’t even say goodbye.
Suicide seems to linger in uncle Paul’s mind, he knows it’s stupid but still he thinks it all the time, he isn’t thinking clear… and all he is doing is hurting people he holds dear.
I know that you are in Heaven, looking down from above, but please show us dear Riley my brother some love.
I have seen so many people slate her for her choices.
Now most people wouldn’t do this to themselves but who are they to judge her.
Torz is a happy creative individual, her body modifications don’t change her as a person.
She is a positive, friendly lady.
So far she has had her ears altered, horns put in, cut out tattoos, had her tongue split, cut off her little finger and has numerous tattoos and piercings and much much more.
But who cares what she does if she’s happy, is it harming you?
She does not do this for attention or fame but her own joy.
Please remember if you see her on social media, or in public keep your opinions nice, this is not your face, nor your body, this is Torz.
Many reporters, social media users and websites call her crazy, sick, an idiot who is starved for attention & “Internet points”.
Big up to Torz I personally think she’s awesome and should be proud to be different.
**Some of these photos are not very pleasant** After a discussion with my consultants I’ve decided to raise awareness to what happens to me and also publicly thank the doctors, consultants and nurses at Northwick hospital..
on June 26th I picked a sty on my eye, went to bed, by 5am I woke feeling poorly, so poorly I text my doctor, completely unaware how seriously ill I had become, as you will see in the photos my face had swollen quite badly, this then continued to grow and over the course of a few hours- I became completely Unrecognisable, I sent a photo to my gp who immediately sent me to hospital, I was then taken by ambulance to another hospital, The next few hours can only be described as petrifying – Meanwhile I’m being sick, have no feeling in my fingers and toes and my temp is 42 !!
When we arrive at Northwick Park hospital a quick thinking doctor takes a photo of me and runs this to a consultant who at the time is in surgery, he immediately leaves and comes to see me, I’m given a CT scan and taken into surgery.
What I didn’t know is behind the eye is a tube ( I don’t know the medical name/term for this) and this leads straight to the brain… my infection was across my face and behind my eye… I was very close to brain damage, blindness and death.
These quick thinking doctors saved my life… things could have been so different.
The several anaesthetists who rushed me into surgery, the infection consultant, the facial surgeon, the night doctors, night nurses who changed my intravenous drip every hour on the hour, ( I had three, all three had two antibiotics drips) the hourly checks with my eye, temp and bloods. When they say nurses are over worked and unpaid. This is an understatement!!!!!
This was such a scary experience and I wouldn’t want anyone to have to go through this… please don’t pick stys, spots, anything ( these things lead to cellulitis/ bacteria meningitis) please don’t wait to call a doctor or get things checked out, life can me cut very short, very quickly.
I will be forever grateful to all the doctors I have seen, everyone who works at the GREY ward in Northwick Park hospital!!! I can’t thank you enough from the bottom of my and my family heart.
To all my Danny, sister, to both our families and friends who have shown me so much love and support… your kindness and love has been truly extraordinary, I’ve been blown away by you all.
Tell people you love them, be kind and have no regrets. â€ïž
I am going to make a full recovery and already feel back my normal self.. and posting ;-))))) haha!
To all of the mothers out there who throw a fit when another woman treats your child as her own: why isn’t that exactly what you want?
I prayed one night for the type of woman my daughter’s father would be with, knowing that she would be raised in two homes.
Kayla has been a gift of so much more than I could have hoped for. She started nursing school and Payton has been infatuated ever since. So Kayla ordered a pair of mini scrubs for her to match.
Let me tell you, I’m raising a strong girl, a smart girl and a sweet girl. And I want nothing more than for her to be surrounded with role models who are exactly that.
Thank you Kayla for showing Payton how to chase her dreams, how to work hard and stay up late to study for a test. Thank you for still making time to ride her bike with her and make her mac and cheese even in one of the stressful times of your life.
You’re a true role model and an amazing bonus mom and we are so proud of you!
If you’re co-parenting, and seeing your child doing things like this doesn’t bring a smile to your face, reconsider what’s truly best for your child. Payton has more people to love her this way, and what more could a mother ever want for her child? Being best friends with me AND being best friends with Kayla, is exactly where P deserves to be.
My 9 year old daughter came running down the stairs tonight in absolute tears.
She has had the app Alimas baby 2.
My daughter had been on a 2 day long school trip and returned home earlier this afternoon, after her evening meal and bath, she asked if she could spend sometime on her tablet before bed.
Within 10 minutes of being on her tablet she came down stairs really upset, all she kept saying was she had hurt a baby, she should never become a mum.
I didn’t understand what she was talking about, I know she has a child lock on her YouTube so can’t watch anything inappropriate.
Once she had calmed down she showed me, I was shocked!!!
This is a children’s game, this is totally wrong and has scared my child.
If you do not feed your virtual baby, it begins to starve, its ribs sink in and eventually it dies, you can also release a ghost to scare the baby whilst it’s alive.
When your toddler is screaming and laying on the floor, people will often comment and say wait until they’re teenagers.
I expected my child to grow to be a moody, inconsiderate, back chatting sod.
I thought the hardest thing about having a teenager was going to be the awful attitude, slamming of doors and the constant worry of whom they were hanging around.
No one told me what the actual hardest part of having a teenager was.
Well I will tell you, it’s birthdays and Christmas, after the first few years of them wanting a phone or the latest console, it gets to the stage of what the hell do you buy them.
Ok, they’ve asked for one thing but myself like many parents don’t like to just purchase one gift and like to provide their child with a surprise or two.
Gone are the days of a living room filled with presents, many of which costs next to nothing, now comes the tiny pile and the huge price tag.
Have you been caught out by the new Facebook feature?
Last month Facebook added a new feature of the “Hello” button.
Many people have experienced issues with this especially where it is placed.
It’s right next to the add/remove friend button.
This could be particularly awkward if you were checking out the profile of someone you don’t know or – even worse – stalking an ex-partner, enemy or class teachers.
One woman accidently said hello to her child’s nursery teacher and another waved at her ex of 15 years.
