Category: Our stories

  • Be Kind To The New Mum In Your Playgroup

    When you see a new mum come into your playgroup, and she stands away from everyone because she’s new. Talk to her. Talk to her the next three times you see her, because for her, she’s come into a new environment where everyone has their own click, and she’s overwhelmed… but she’s come there to make friends because she wants to connect with other mums. She spent the morning rushing to get there, trying to look like she’s got it together and that she’s not petrified. Talk to her. Sure, she might not live in your area, go to your social events, be the same nationality whatever, but that’s the beauty of getting to know someone new.

    If that mother at mothers group keeps cancelling on you but always reschedules, keep trying, keep trying at least three more times and tell her it’ll be okay to catch up. She might be riddled with anxiety and not coping, your persistence could save her sanity and make her feel loved.

    If a mum smiles at you at the park, smile back. Talk to her, make a friend, she doesn’t have to baptise your child but now you both have someone to go to the park with. You both don’t have to feel alone on days its relentless. You both can help each other watch your kids together and it’ll feel so much easier.

    If your mum friend hasn’t been herself lately, and doesn’t want to do anything, go to her house, bring her some coffee and wine and chocolate, xanax, whatever, and tell her she’s got this, tell her she’s not alone. That not matter what motherhood throws at her, that you’ll do it together. Go do her dishes and insist, INSIST she eats pizza with you while the kids destroy the house and give her a big hug.

    All these mums might have woken up today saying I can’t do this, I have no one and I’m a failure, they might have been up all night with a restless baby, a teething toddler or whatever. They might think they are the worst mum in the world, but on a day where someone has given them some warmth, someone has given them a little encouragement and a little love, it’ll make them feel like a million bucks.

    I’ve been all of these mums in all of these occasions and some days I needed to be rescued, some days I pushed back hard, some days I hated that I felt I was the only one who wasn’t coping and all I needed was someone to reach out, and when they did, I felt like a million bucks.

    Motherhood is hard, its beautiful and rewarding, its many things, but it’s hard and heartbreaking sometimes. It’s not always a network of people helping us out, some days we are all have. Sometimes all the days we are all we have, no village, no family, no one. So make a friend, keep that play date, make those plans and keep them, introduce new mums to your friends too.

    We don’t have to compete we just have to love and tell that mother who deserves to hear it, that she’s not invisible, that’s she’s not alone, and that she is doing a wonderful job and we have her back!

    Full credit to the amazing Laura Mazza-Mum on the run, check out her Facebook page https://facebook.com/themumontherun/

  • Anxiety Is More Than Just Fear And Worry

    Anxiety isn’t just having a hard time catching your breath. Anxiety is waking up at 3 am from a dead sleep because your heart is racing.

    Anxiety is breaking out in a rash for no reason. Anxiety is stressing over things that may or my not be real. Anxiety is questioning your faith, how could my creator allow me to feel this way!?

    Anxiety is calling your sister 3 hours before she gets up for work, in hopes she’ll answer so you can get your mind off the attack. Anxiety is a 2 am shower.

    Anxiety is your mood changing in a matter of minutes. Anxiety is uncontrollable shaking and twitching. Anxiety is crying, real and painful tears. Anxiety is nausea. Anxiety is crippling. Anxiety is dark. Anxiety is having to make up excuse after excuse for your behavior.

    Anxiety is fear. Anxiety is worry. Anxiety is physically and emotionally draining. Anxiety is raw. Anxiety is real. Anxiety is a fight with your spouse, even though you’re not mad. Anxiety is snapping at the smallest annoyance. Anxiety is flashbacks. Anxiety is “what if.” Anxiety is a lot of “what’s wrong” and “I don’t know.”

    Your feelings matter. Just because you’re bothered by something others aren’t, it doesn’t make you crazy or worthless. Some of the most successful people in life have anxiety. This is not your fault. This is not the end. You are strong. You are intelligent. You are brave. You are worthy.

    -Written by Brittany Nichole Morefield

    Charity providing support if you’ve been diagnosed with an anxiety condition.

    Phone: 03444 775 774 (Mon to Fri, 9.30am to 5.30pm)

    Website: www.anxietyuk.org.uk

  • Serious Health Risk From Candles

    Lisa Paterson has taken to Facebook to warn other about candles, Paterson said “I had to take Caitlin to a&e this morning as she woke up and her face was covered in soot. I thought it was carbon monoxide from my boiler but it wasn’t. The hospital confirmed that Caitlin had been getting poisoned during the night as she slept by her candle and if she lay there much longer the outcome would have been so different. Caitlin had burned and blew out her candle the night before and it turned black during the night. All candles have been thrown out of this house as they are so dangerous. I had never heard of this before so I am sharing this status to let everyone else know how dangerous candles can be. Thankfully Caitlin is ok she was a very lucky girl today”.

    The number of aromatic candle manufacturers, professional and amateur, grows each year. A number of these introduce candles to their product line without the knowledge necessary to produce a safe and clean-burning product. Chemical testing provides conclusive evidence that emissions from some burning candles contain more than twenty volatile organic compounds, lead and a significant amount of carbon.

    Burning scented candles inside homes, flats and commercial buildings can present serious health hazards to those living and working there. It can also mean damage to ventilation systems, furnishing and content. Evidence suggests breathing even one micron of particulate soot can be hazardous. Scientists have determined breathing particulate matter 2.5 microns or smaller is detrimental to human health. These particles are dangerous because they are inhaled deeply into the lungs, causing irritation and respiratory problems. Those at extra risk include people with heart or lung disease, children and the elderly.

    It is advised to burn candles for no more than an hour at a time and allow for cool-down period before re-lighting. Do not burn candles under a draft, like vents or near fans and heaters.

  • The Shocking Reality Of The LOL Bigger Surprise

    Natalie Harrison has taken to Facebook to share a photo of the LOL dolls £84.99 bigger surprise box.

    Harrison said “Anyone thinking of buying the LOl bigger surprise for £84.99 this is what you get”

    Harrison’s post has since gone viral having been shared over a hundred thousand times and rising.

    Most of the comments claim that it is a rip off, Hannah Smith said “you are better off just buying 8 balls”, Samantha Jane Brunton was angry and said ” I think that’s absolutely disgusting charging that kind of money for such a tiny amount of shite”

    However some think it is worth the money, Beth Starkey was passionate with her words ” I’ve got this for my daughter, I couldn’t give a flying fuck what’s in it, she will absolutely love it, I think I’m the only person that actually thinks they are worth the money, t dolls are so cute I want to play with them myself”.

    Do you feel the price tag shouldn’t matter as the look on your childs face on christmas morning is priceless.

    Gillian McVittie is on a budget but had a brilliant idea to cut costs Mcvittie said “I’ve bought some of the wraps, glitter dolls, pets and other bits and making a goodie box up myself. I plan to wrap a box and them all in tissue paper or something  inside , I will also be adding LOL colouring books and bubble bath”.

    Whats your view on the whole LOL range? Are you gong to spend a lot of money on them and maybe buy the £84 bigget surprise box or possibly even purchase the LOL surprise house playset which are selling at the lowest price of £160.

  • I Am So Done With Helping Others

    I am so done with helping others.

    All my life I have sacrificed the things I want or need in life to help others.

    You want me to look after your children as you have to work, no problem I’ll change my plans to have them.

    You need a lift to the supermarket, not an issue, I’ll use my petrol to take you, doesn’t matter that it means I’ll have to tighten my budget that week, after all we are friends.

    You need someone to help with your child’s football team, of course I’ll help, I’ll take all the complaints because little Jimmy didn’t play a whole match or it will be my fault the team lost, I’m sorry I was trying my best.

    Lend you some money, yeah not an issue I know you are struggling just the same as me, friends will go without for each other.

    This is how I used to be, first to volunteer to help, first to be there for everyone, never thinking of how it was affecting my own life.

    However I have come to realise I can never do enough for some people, they will always take more and more until I have nothing left and then throw me away.

    I will not volunteer to help with any sports or events to then receive complaints and moans from those who wouldn’t step up to the plate ever!

    I am done, it is over, I do for me now and me alone, for those I have helped would never help me in return.

    I am so happy in my selfish, lonesome, happy, bitchy free zone. Welcome to freedom any one want to come along for the ride?

    I still help two friends who would walk over hot coals for me but I have cleared myself of all the fake mates

  • Here’s Why Babies Need Tummy Time

    Babies NEED tummy time!

    At 11 months old, this little cutie should have a nicely rounded head, developed S curves in his neck and low back, and flexible legs that move in and out of various sitting positions.

    But, largely due to lack of time on his tummy and OVERUSE of “baby containers” such as bouncy seats, swings, and car seat carriers that go from car to grocery store to restaurant, he has positional plagiocephaly (flat skull) a big ol’ C curve in his spine preventing him from getting on hands and knees to crawl, and hips and legs so tight he can’t even straighten his knees! And these are only the outwardly visible problems…too much pressure on baby’s spine and vision centers of the brain from lying on their backs are detrimental to development! So….tummy time, tummy time, tummy time! Do it!

    ADDITIONAL INSIGHT:

    Tummy time IS absolutely important for development! It doesn’t have to be on the floor, but can be on the caregiver’s chest, supported over their lap or bent knees, or on a nursing pillow for younger babies. Many of the comments we’ve read are stating babies shouldn’t be placed in “unnatural” positions or those they can get out of. As developmental therapists, we specialize in the timeline of babies moving from the flexion posture (fetal position) through anti-gravity extension.

    The ONLY “natural” position for a baby is flexion. If you lay an infant on their back, i.e. In extension their arms flail and they think they’re falling (this is the Moro reflex) and is why we swaddle babies to keep their arms and legs tucked in close like they were in the womb. The flexion tummy time provides is in fact very safe and natural. We urge you to find a specialist in your area if your baby struggles with reflux and isn’t tolerating tummy time that can help develop strategies that will promote being off of their backs.

    AGAIN, this post is directed to parents and caregivers of babies who are typically developing and not those with special needs or other medical diagnoses. The baby in the picture fits this description. It is not meant to be judgmental but informative on what CAN happen. We are so pleased that it has opened up conversation between parents and health care providers to help prevent these issues from occurring.

    Credit https://www.facebook.com/Kids-Unlimited-169949259701490/

  • Teach Your Children To Look After Others

    You know when you were younger and you did something real stupid because your mates told you to? And then your mum would say ‘if your mates told you to jump off a cliff would you do it? Obviously you got her point and knew you wouldn’t do anything too silly because you understood the difference between silly… and silly silly!

    Well this is my son Jacob. He is 16 and autistic. He doesn’t understand the difference between silly silly. If someone tells Jacob to do something and he thinks they will like him because of this, then Jacob does it. No matter how dangerous.

    A group of Jacobs ‘friends’ told Jacob to go and pick up a deodorant can that had been chucked into a fire. Jacob did it. He didn’t understand what would happen and everyone thought it was funny.

    The can blew up in my sons face. His head caught on fire. They all laughed. NOBODY called an ambulance. Nobody called me. NOBODY walked him home. Nobody tried to put out the fire on his head. He ran into Tesco’s holding his blistering face and ran his head under the hot tap because he didn’t know which one to use because he couldn’t see.

    NOBODY asked him if he was okay. NOBODY stopped him and asked him if he needed help. Jacob then walked home. I heard the screams as he walked up to the house.

    Teach Your Children To Look After Others
    Teach Your Children To Look After Others

    Jacob was rushed to RVI (Royal Victoria Infirmary) burns unit last night. Luckily he only has 1st degree burns to his face. His hair is singed and he has black eyes from the impact. He also has a bruise and cut to his thigh where the can hit him so hard it cut open his leg. If that had hit him in the face my son could be blind.

    I am writing this to ask you to not only remind your children of their own safety but also be considerate of those more vulnerable than themselves. Jacob got off lightly. He had a lucky escape. So did the people who encouraged him to do something so obviously silly when it is dangerous. Because if he had not been so lucky this might have had a permanent impact on everyone involved.

    Be kind. Don’t just be kind to yourself but be kind to people who need you to be kind to them. And teach your children to look after the kids that need looking after and are a bit ‘different’

    It’s an important lesson. One that we could all do with remembering.

    Please share this to raise awareness of the dangers of playing with fire and also those people in a less fortunate position than yourselves.

    Thanks to everyone that helped with Jacob last night.

    Kerry Louise

  • Mum Brutally Stabbed Saving Her Young Daughter

    KNIFE CRIME IS NOT OK IN ANY WAY

    On the 7th of October I was called by my 15-year-old daughter who had been jumped with 3 of her friends and as she was shook up and scared she called me for help to come pick her up this was at 7:55 pm

    I was given a lift to the co-op  in Basildon and when we arrived I got out of the car and walked towards where my child was my child had her friend’s phone which she needed to return to her friend standing in sight so I agreed that it was ok so I was a few paces behind my daughter my daughter handed the mobile back to her friend and we started walking back go the car which I could see.

     Out of no where a man came out of no where and went straight for my daughter I saw his knife before I saw his face and he had every intention to stab my baby girl 15 years old so I pushed my baby girl as hard as I could and she fell to the floor before I realised before I had chance to turn around or run away he unprovoked stuck the knife through my side as my arms were in the air busy pushing my child and run off.

    I was bleeding out luckily I was taken to Basildon hospital and was worked on for hours having surgery in A&E as I was in such a serious condition I had puncture lung and nicked a bit of my heart splintered 4 of my ribs I died on that trolley and I can only praise Basildon hospital and all the staff who saved my life.

    It will take months to recover been told that I might not ever make a full recovery but I am alive to be able to raise my children my youngest is only 3 years old and no one has the right to hurt people or to take away a loving mother whose children are her world.

    We need to set up a knife programme in Basildon to try to educate as many people as possible as it’s not just the person who has been stabbed who is affected by this terrible behaviour it’s the family and friends and the little children waiting for you to return home my 3-year-old daughter was heart-broken totally devastated because I was not at home raising my children but I was in hospital fighting for my Life this has to stop now.

    By Tracy Larkowsky

  • These Snowmen Are Inappropriate

    It had been snowing all night. So at ….

    8:00 I made a snowman.

    8:10 A feminist passed by and asked me why I didn’t make a snow woman.

    8:15 So, I made a snow woman

    8:17 My feminist neighbor complained about the snow woman’s voluptuous chest saying it objectified snow women everywhere

    8:20 The gay couple living nearby threw a hissy fit and moaned it could have been two snowmen instead

    8:22 The transgender person asked why I didn’t just make one snow person with detachable parts

    8:25 The vegans at the end of the lane complained about the carrot nose, as veggies are food and not to decorate snow figures with.

    8:28 I am being called a racist because the snow couple is white..

    8:31 The Muslim gent across the road demands the snow woman wear a burqa

    8:40 The Police arrive saying someone has been offended

    8:42 The feminist neighbour complained again that the broomstick of the snow woman needs to be removed because it depicted women in a domestic role

    8:43 The Government equalities officer arrived and threatened me with eviction

    8:45 TV news crew from the BBC shows up. I am asked if I know the difference between snowmen and snow-women? I reply, “Snowballs” and am called a sexist.

    9:00 I’m on the News as a suspected terrorist, racist, homophobic sensibility offender bent on stirring up trouble during difficult weather.

    9:10 I am asked if I have any accomplices… My children are taken by social services

    9:29 Far left protesters offended by everything are marching down the street demanding for me to be beheaded

    Moral: There is no moral to this story. It’s just the world in which we live today and it’s going to get worse.

  • Best Thing I’ve Ever Heard From A Man

    Best thing ive ever heard from a man.

    “So I had been with my partner about 6/7 years and had a 5-year-old and a 1-year-old. She also had a 13-year-old from a previous relationship.

    We had no sex life, we always argued over stupid things like me not helping around the house and the kids as much. How tired she was etc etc Why should I? I work full-time.

    So in the end we split, I would go see the kids every few days then it eventually stopped. Single life had taken over. Partying, drinking, dating, Just plain old all about me.

    Then one night after about 5 months of being split up with the misses it clicked. I missed her, I missed the way she looked in the morning, the stupid little jokes, the way my tea was always ready, the way the house always smelt fresh, fresh bedding, clean pots, hugs, kiss. Everything.

    So the next day after work about half 5, I went round and then as I walked in I saw nothing had changed.. And what I mean by that is either if im there or not. Been a mother doesn’t stop. The kids were sat eating tea, while she was putting washing in and out, cleaning the pots and all while making sure the kids ate they tea.

    So to me I knew right there that the woman stood in front of me (well on the go like a mad woman) was amazing. She never stopped even when I left. I had my time to myself. Where was her time? Where was her single life? It was here. Looking after her/our kids, home and herself. While all I thought about was me.

    We didn’t get back together because I was so selfish and didn’t realise I should have appreciated everything she does for us in the now. Rather than take her for granted and lose her.

    So to everyone wondering why woman always nag for help…. sit back and look. Look at your woman and watch exactly what she does in her life because it’s certainly not looking after her. She’s last on her list. So you look after her before another man will.

    Credit Aimee Bethany Jordan Atha