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  • Motherhood Is Isolating

    MOTHERHOOD IS…

    Motherhood is isolating.

    Hours spent in the dark bouncing or breastfeeding a baby alone. Day upon day stuck in the house with sick kids in winter.

    Motherhood is monotonous.

    Change them, feed them, wash them, clean up after them. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. Laundry, well, that alone is insurmountable.

    Motherhood is invisibility.

    When everyone else’s needs scream louder than yours. It’s remembering to eat breakfast despite catering for the individual preferences of everyone else. It’s eating the leftover cut outs from your kids star shaped sandwich or the rejected items from the dinner plate. It’s cleaning the lounge every night because otherwise it will do your head in, despite everyone else taking little notice. It’s changing the roll on the toilet paper holder instead of leaving it on the floor. It’s making sure everyone has what they need for the next day to make the morning run smoother despite no one else giving it a second thought.

    Motherhood is sacrifice.

    It’s having an audience to pee, it’s juggling times to have a shower. It’s fitting what you can into the time the baby naps. It’s getting home from work and barely having a moment to breathe before you switch from one ‘hat’ to the other. It’s when we struggle to fulfil our cups of sacrifice with self care, which is like a bandaid for the gaping wound that is a lack of hands on societal support and the missing close knit community or tribe like times of old.

    Motherhood is comparison.

    Its insta lunchboxes and designer labels. It’s who subscribes to what label of parenting and pro versus anti, this versus that. It’s a concern of not being enough or being reminded of “what happened in my day” or “I turned out ok despite….”. It’s fear and threats of spoiling babes or creating rods for backs. It’s graphs or averages, measuring against some status quo. It’s fighting the tide to try and listen to your own inner instincts and your babes individual preferences and needs.

    Motherhood is triage.

    Knowing who to tend to first, which order to address the whinging. It’s knowing when encouragement and support are needed and when you need to jump in and help out.

    Motherhood is a balancing act.

    It’s remembering to be present in the moment with our kids and knowing which are times you can snatch to achieve a critical task. It’s trying to grab seconds of self and still attempting to be selfless in our intentions. It’s balancing trying to achieve things and being interrupted continuously to the point where it is impossible to finish anything.

    Motherhood is a head fuck.

    When you feel like you have no more to spare, you still have to. When you feel so touched out and like you actually might scream if someone doesn’t get off your boob immediately, but you still do it. When you don’t know if you’re doing anything at all right but the fact you are actually questioning that, in and of itself actually means you’re a good mum, even if you don’t believe it.

    Motherhood is appreciating the small things.

    The fact you managed to survive another day. You dealt with a million tantrums or a kid questioning that keeps pushing every boundary. You managed to keep a fearless toddler alive despite their best efforts otherwise (stop fucking jumping off the bookcase kid! :/ ). You handled what seemed insurmountable when you got out of bed, already tired, and did what you needed to get to the next bedtime.

    Motherhood is wonderful.

    Little feet and hands. Tiny people with a little bits of you in them. Cuddles and kisses. Peacefully sleeping faces. “I love you”s and “Mama you’re the best”s. It’s pride and joy and oh so much love.

    ___________

    What is motherhood for you at the moment? 😍

    Credit https://www.facebook.com/babywearingwithjess/

     

  • Do You Know Where The Original Little Mermaid Comes From

    Friendly reminder that The Little Mermaid is based on a book by Hans Christian Andersen published in 1837 where “Ariel” has her tongue ripped out in exchange for feet (feet that bleed the entire time she’s on land, btw).

    She comes on land to try to win the prince’s love in order to steal part of his soul (mermaids apparently don’t have souls, but live for 300 years, so I guess you win some, ya lose some). She fails, and the prince marries someone else. She contemplates murdering him in his bed, but can’t bring herself to do it, so she dies/melts into seafoam.

    By the way, her skin is green.

    There. Now I’VE ruined your childhood, and you can stop complaining about/debating the casting choice of a Disney remake about fish people, and start worrying about the fact that our president is a fucking moron and ruining our country, people still aren’t vaccinating their children, and there are children in cages at our southern border.

    Thanks Abby

    Artwork By Jeffrey Thomas

    Credit https://www.facebook.com/Justyn09

     

  • Don’t Throw Away Your Car Seats After A Crash

    ❗❗PSA: If you get in an collision, DON’T THROW THAT CAR SEAT AWAY ❗❗

    A car accident is one of the worst things that can happen to a family. It’s terrifying and life changing.

    Not only do you have to worry about medical bills, transportation, and insurance, but if you have a Graco seat in the vehicle, a car accident – any accident – means those seats must be replaced.

    BUT.

    That’s not the end of the story.

    After our car accident, several people told me that Graco (Newell Brands) would replace seats involved in a collision for free. I was a bit skeptical, but I was desperate, so I emailed their contact support. I was put in touch with a lovely lady named Miriam who worked tirelessly to get our boys back into Graco seats ASAP.

    She sent me boxes to put our old seats in, because these seats involved in real collisions are VITAL for their engineering team. They use these seats to improve future models, and to find aspects they want to keep. I sent those seats out last week, and last night these bright, BRAND NEW beauties showed up 😍😍😍😍

    Yes, completely FREE OF CHARGE!! I am so blessed, and so thankful to have the opportunity to continue rear-facing my 4-year-old!

    Have you ever heard of a better company??

    Thank you Graco, from the bottom of our hearts.

    Also: If you’re wondering if your child is in the right carseat for their age/size, you can find some awesome info right here!

    https://howhesraised.net/2017/06/is-your-child-safe-in-the-car/

    To those who don’t understand why extended rear-facing is so important, you can see our accident story here:

    https://m.facebook.com/story.php?story_fbid=2195055607243072&id=100002159616529

    ETA: I know most insurance companies will issue funds when you have to buy a new car seat, but this is just another option ☺️. And, even if your insurance replaces your seat, you should still look into sending your seat to the manufacturer for their engineering team!

    Credit https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100002159616529

     

  • Bullied At School For Being The Horse Freak

    Bullied at school for being the horse freak

    When I was at school, I had a best friend, a ride or die type (we both rode, pun very much intended). We were as close as best friends possibly could be, but within a year we became total strangers. I couldn’t tell you the last time I spoke to her, I don’t think we are even friends on Facebook now.

    We both rode, and had both just come into the world of Affiliated Eventing (BE). I think we were around 13 or 14 at the time. We were obsessed. We’d talk about it constantly through our free periods at school, and go riding, training and competing together most weekend, as well as training on our own every day after school.

    We’d fantasise about our rise to the top of the sport and decided that one of us would win Badminton, while the other won Burghley the same year, so it was fair. Obviously.

    We were good, too! We weren’t just playing around. We genuinely wanted serious careers in Eventing.

    There were mutters about us being weird for being so into horses, but we didn’t care, because we were a team. The mutterers didn’t understand.

    Around this time we both got spotted by the popular crowd. We went to an all girls Catholic school, so the politics were serious business!

    We were invited to parities and days out, all being on the weekend.

    This is where it all started to unravel. My best friend chose to sacrifice her weekends for the popular crowd. I kept my weekends for Eventing.

    From then on, I started to ride more, while my best friend rode less and less. The time we used to spend talking about our goals, was spent with us awkwardly sitting on the edge of the popular circle, listening to them talk about pressing topics such as The Kardashians.

    I spent some time with them on the weekends that I wasn’t Eventing and I genuinely remember going to a party where my best friend turned to me and said, ‘no would would even notice if we just left.’ She was completely right. From then on I turned my back on that circle, but my best friend stayed on the edge.

    Now that I was the only person riding competitively, I had a serious target on my back.

    I had different hobbies from anyone else, I had an actual passion, and that was different, abnormal, making me ‘weird’. I was quickly labelled the ‘horse girl’.

    It’s amazing how being branded the very thing you want to be, by the wrong people, can make you question everything about yourself and your passion.

    I had also managed to royally piss off the popular circle by rejecting them for horses!

    And so the bullying began.

    I was called fat because I had muscular thighs.

    I was called boring because I put my horses first.

    I was forever known as the weird horse girl.

    By the age of 14, I was Eventing at BE100 and doing really well competitively, but I was embarrassed and kept my achievements to myself, afraid of sparking more comments.

    I thought that I was no good at my passion and was ashamed to be proud of myself.

    I remember putting some Eventing photos on my Facebook page, and then I was battered for them when I went back to school the next day, so I stopped posting.

    All of this made me feel as though my ‘little hobby’ was pathetic and that my achievements meant nothing.

    However, this only encouraged me to throw myself in deeper with the horses.

    Although, my self esteem was now in tatters.

    Whenever people would talk about what they wanted to do when they are older, I would dodge the question, and if I was forced to answer it I would often lie.

    In reality (the kind of reality that is bigger than the Catholic all girls school bubble) having a passion, something that you really live for, is SUCH a cool thing! I am so lucky to say that I adore my job, I suspect most of the business men and women in the world wouldn’t be able to say the same. In fact, I reckon the majority of those snotty girls in my year hate their jobs now!

    But, because it was different, and abnormal, it was again just another thing to be bullied for.

    I battled with my thoughts for years (and still do sometimes) about whether I was gifted enough, good enough or special enough for a career in horses.

    The negative self talk in my mind (the voice that said ‘you can’t do it, you’re not good enough’) would get stronger every time a girl at school would make a snobby comment, or scoff at the thought of me following my dreams.

    Unfortunately, during this time I had an instructor who very quickly dismissed me when I said I really do seriously want to be a professional Eventer. I remember him literally laughing at me.

    I didn’t give up, I was severely wounded by the bullying and my coach’s words, but I was more determined to prove everybody wrong than I was worried I would fail, so I limped on, and I kept limping on until I had made my dreams a reality.

    I am on track with the dream that my best friend and I dreamt up all those years ago.

    I wonder how my best friend’s self esteem is now; having been forced by popular peer pressure to give up on her own dream. She did give up horses very quickly after we grew apart.

    This is just my story, and a very rough outline at that. I see similar cases all the time, TALENTED kids that put horses on the back seat to go to more parties.

    The most heartbreaking kind is a girl that I know now, who had a real fire burning to get her to the top of the sport – she was a brilliant rider, too! But the pressure of exams, friends, self doubt, negative comparison to others, and being afraid to break out of the mould, had meant she has given up on her dreams, and is now aiming for a ‘normal’ job instead.

    If you are lucky enough to have a passion, don’t let anyone tell you it is anything less than a beautiful thing.

    Just because you may be different does not make you weird.

    People talk about you? Good, that means you are making a difference! Make them talk!

    What makes you different is what makes you beautiful.

    Stick by your dreams, don’t give up on them. Keep working until you make them happen.

    Hard work beats all else.

    My best friend and I?

    I took over management of my first yard at age 21, and have ridden for a living since I was 18. The goal is still very much Badminton and Burghley.

    She is aiming for an office job, and hasn’t ridden for years.

    Oh, and the trainer who laughed at me? I competed at a higher level than him by the time I was 18.

    EVERYBODY has to start somewhere, EVERYBODY has doubters along the way, EVERYBODY wants to give it all up at some point.

    Don’t let other people control your future! Stay true to YOU.

    Credit https://www.facebook.com/CDBeventing/

  • May You Have Just One Friend Like This

    May you have that one friend.

    That one friend who you can spend all day with and not get tired of. Truly.

    That one friend who shows up at your house uninvited and knows she’s as welcome as if you’d had it planned for weeks.

    That one friend who loves and disciplines your child as her own.

    That one friend who sings your praises, cheers your victories, and calls out your bullshit.

    That one friend who asks how you are and actually listens to the answer.

    That one friend who brings you a donut for no good reason. (She knows that donuts are their own good reason.)

    That one friend who is so different from you that it doesn’t make sense for you to be friends, but somehow it totally works.

    That one friend who loves you in your pool hair & wet swimsuit as much as she does in your full makeup & prettiest dress.

    That one friend who you can ask to pray for you… and you know she actually does it. And vice versa.

    That one friend who sends you screenshots of funny memes that neither of you would dare re-post online.

    That one friend who knows that a vent session will not be held against her.

    That one friend who agrees that Taco Tuesdays should not be confined to only Tuesdays.

    That one friend who you can adventure with.

    That one friend who you can lay on the couch with and watch hours of cooking shows full of recipes that you know neither of you will EVER make.

    That one friend who knows the reason you turned down a night out is because you have strict plans to wear sweat pants and do nothing at home by yourself. And she loves you anyway.

    That one friend who has got your back. For real.

    That one friend who qualifies as a sister.

    May you have that one friend.

    (via Happy Like This)

  • Warning To Dog Owners-Alabama Rot Disease

    Warning to dog owners as several cases of deadly Alabama Rot is confirmed!

    Alabama Rot, also known as CRGV (cutaneous and renal glomerular vasculopathy) is an increasingly common disease in dogs.

    It causes damage to blood vessels of the skin, and also to the kidneys, and dogs with the disease can suffer from skin ulcers, acute kidney failure and even death.

    Two new cases of the deadly dog disease have now been confirmed, including the first ever in Essex.

    The cases were confirmed by Anderson Moores Veterinary Specialists with one in Manningtree and the other recorded in Ivybridge, Devon.

    In total the UK has now seen 188 confirmed cases across 39 counties since 2012, with 52 cases in 2018 and 13 in 2019 so far.

    The advice to dog owners is that, while the disease is still very rare, vets are still warning dog owners to remain calm but vigilant.

    Owners are advised to seek advice from their local vet if their dog develops unexplained skin lesions.

    What steps should I take to protect my dog?

    While there isn’t a known cause of the disease, there are ways to give your dog the best possible chance of avoiding Alabama Rot:

    * Know the warning signs – This is key to treating the disease. If caught early then your vet can evaluate if your dog has contracted CRGV.

    * Wash off woodland mud – The majority of cases are reported after dogs are taken for walks in muddy, woodland areas. Make sure you wash your dog thoroughly to ensure all woodland mud has been removed following a walk.

    * Check for symptoms – Always be on the look out for the common symptoms, and if you’re in any doubt call the vet.

  • Labour Is Hard On Birth Partners Too

    People look at me like I have two heads when I dare to utter the words ‘Labour is hard on birth partners too’

    .

    ‘WTF is she on about?!’ Their faces say. ‘Doesn’t she know it’s ME who’s pushing a human out of my vagina?!’

    .

    Well yep. I know that’s true, and having done it twice, I know the intensity of if from our perspective (and trust me when I say I’ll equip you to work with that intensity, using the power of your body and mind) BUT, I have also seen and heard how difficult it can be for those supporting us. More so when THEY are unprepared and unsure of their role.

    .

    Imagine seeing the person you love most working so hard, in some level of discomfort and not knowing you can help in loads of ways!

    .

    Even when they are prepared and full of confidence, it’s an experience which draws upon all of your resources for both of you. Birth partners don’t have the same level of hormonal high to boost them either. Together though, you can smash this birth thing. If he knows what you want and need, and has a variety of tools to offer you along the way, you both have purpose in the birth room, you work well as a team, you feel safer and more relaxed, and Birth is easier.

    📷 @photosbylei

    Credit https://www.facebook.com/steph.doitlikeamother/

     

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  • Priceless Lizard Funny Story

    Here’s what happened:

    Just after dinner one night, my son came up to tell me there was “something wrong” with one of the two lizards he holds prisoner in his room.

    “He’s just lying there looking sick,” he told me. “I’m serious, Dad . Can you help?”

    I put my best lizard-healer expression on my face and followed him into his bedroom. One of the little lizards was indeed lying on his back, looking stressed. I immediately knew what to do.

    “Honey,” I called, “come look at the lizard!”

    “Oh, my gosh!” my wife exclaimed. “She’s having babies.”

    “What?” my son demanded. “But their names are Bert and Ernie, Mom!”

    I was equally outraged.

    “Hey, how can that be? I thought we said we didn’t want them to reproduce,” I said accusingly to my wife.

    “Well, what do you want me to do, post a sign in their cage?”she inquired (I think she actually said this sarcastically!).

    “No, but you were supposed to get two boys!” I reminded her (in my most loving, calm, sweet voice, while gritting my teeth).

    “Yeah, Bert and Ernie!” my son agreed.

    “Well, it’s just a little hard to tell on some guys, you know!” she informed me (Again with the sarcasm!).

    By now the rest of the family had gathered to see what was going on. I shrugged, deciding to make the best of it.

    “Kids, this is going to be a wondrous experience,” I announced. “We’re about to witness the miracle of birth.”

    “Oh, gross!” they shrieked.

    “Well, isn’t THAT just great? What are we going to do with a litter of tiny little lizard babies?” my wife wanted to know.

    We peered at the patient. After much struggling, what looked like a tiny foot would appear briefly, vanishing a scant second later.

    “We don’t appear to be making much progress,” I noted.

    “It’s breech,” my wife whispered, horrified.

    “Do something, Dad!” my son urged.

    “Okay, okay.” Squeamishly, I reached in and grabbed the foot when it next appeared, giving it a gentle tug. It disappeared. I tried several more times with the same results.

    “Should I call 911?” my eldest daughter wanted to know. “Maybe they could talk us through the trauma.” (You see a pattern here with the females in my house?)

    “Let’s get Ernie to the vet,” I said grimly.

    We drove to the vet with my son holding the cage in his lap.

    “Breathe, Ernie, breathe,” he urged.

    “I don’t think lizards do Lamaze,” his mother noted to him. (Women can be so cruel to their own young. I mean what she does to me is one thing, but this boy is of her womb, for God’s sake.).

    The vet took Ernie back to the examining room and peered at the little animal through a magnifying glass.

    “What do you think, Doc, a C-section?” I suggested scientifically.

    “Oh, very interesting,” he murmured. “Mr. and Mrs.. Cameron, may I speak to you privately for a moment?”

    I gulped, nodding for my son to step outside.

    “Is Ernie going to be okay?” my wife asked.

    “Oh, perfectly,” the vet assured us. ‘This lizard is not in labor. In fact, that isn’t EVER going to happen. Ernie is a boy. You see, Ernie is a young male. And, occasionally, as they come into maturity, like most male species, they um…um . . . masturbate. Just the way he did, lying on his back.” He blushed, glancing at my wife.

    We were silent, absorbing this.

    “So, Ernie’s just…just…excited?”, my wife offered.

    “Exactly,” the vet replied, relieved that we understood.

    More silence. Then my vicious, cruel wife started to giggle. And giggle. And then even laugh loudly.

    “What’s so funny?” I demanded, knowing, but not believing that the woman I married would commit the upcoming affront to my flawless manliness.

    Tears were now running down her face. “It’s just…that…I’m picturing you pulling on its…its…teeny little…”

    She gasped for more air to bellow in laughter once more.

    “That’s enough,” I warned. We thanked the vet and hurriedly bundled the lizard and our son back into the car.. He was glad everything was going to be okay.

    “I know Ernie’s really thankful for what you did, Dad.” he told me.

    “Oh, you have NO idea,” my wife agreed, collapsing with laughter.

    Two lizards: $140.

    One cage: $50.

    Trip to the vet: $30.

    Memory of your husband pulling on a lizard’s winkie: Priceless!

    Moral of the story: Pay attention in biology class. Lizards lay eggs!

    Credit https://www.facebook.com/sandi.gruhn

     

  • This Cleaning Trend Is Getting Ridiculous

    You all want immaculate homes. You want to cover your house in bleach & you want the perfect grey and white show home. I get it, I really do. But this ‘trend’ has become ridiculous. People aren’t sitting with their children at dinner time because they need to wash the pots and pans straight away. Children aren’t playing with play dough because god forbid the cleaning up. The toys are all hidden away in their bedrooms incase you have a visitor. Bed time stories are non existent because the floor won’t mop itself.

    Slow down mummas.

    Soon enough your children will all be grown up, they’ll fly the nest and you’ll be sat alone in your perfectly tidy home wishing for one more day of chaos.

    It’s not just your home, it’s theirs too. I won’t turn my home into an instagram worthy fragile building. I’ll keep tripping over lego, I’ll laugh whenever the children have more chocolate biscuit around their mouths than in it. I will put the tub of ‘pink stuff’ down and I’ll spend my last £2 buying them an ice cream on the beach. You can moan about the state of my home. You can move that pile of toys of the sofa before you take a seat. But I’d rather spend time with my child than make my house immaculate to please you. Love us for who we are 💜

    Your house is a building, that’s all it is. Your home is the heart beats that fill the walls. It’s the laughter as your children hose down their sandy toes. It’s the squeals of excitement as you do the funny voices in the bedtime story.

    Sing to them Mummas. Sing until your throat is sore. Read that story over and over until the pages turn crisp. Pick them up, even if it is the 10th time today, one day they won’t ask anymore.

    Your child’s fondest memories won’t be watching you on your hands and knees scrubbing the floor. You have forever to tidy up. Your children will never be as young as they are today.

    If you’re one of the lucky ones who will wake up tomorrow morning, appreciate it. If you woke up tomorrow and all the people you love were gone, your house would look the same, your home would never feel the same again ✨

    – Niamh Hocking

     

  • Penis Care Tips

    PENIS CARE

    As a man, keeping your penis healthy  is important.

    Your sexual organs are very valuable and must be cared for.

    1. A clean penis is very important so wash your penis with warm water at least twice a day. Clean the scrotum and under the penis shaft gently and scrub your scrotal sack too.

    2. Leaving too much hair around the penis is not cool.

    During sex,the hair can cause cuts on the vaginal organs and condom.

    Also, hair around the base of the penis can be breeding ground for boils and cause bad odour so shave or keep it short and clean.

    3. Don’t pamper the penis too much, As soon as you notice an infection, boil, rashes, please get help immediately.

    4. Many guys wear one boxer for a whole week or even a month but for health reasons pls change your boxers everyday.

    Dirty boxer may give your penis a permanent bad smell and a bad taste.

    5. Guys what you eat affects the taste of your semen or penile juice.

    Avoid too much garlic, onion, alcohol,coffee and spicy foods.

    Eat fruits that are high in natural sugar like oranges, apples, mangoes and please take honey too.

    They all make your sperm taste good to feed the egg for a healthy baby.

    6. A woman’s face may need makeup but not your penis.

    Avoid using powder around the penis. If you do, especially after shaving, you might have to deal with serious irritations.

    The penis doesn’t need perfume to smell good so don’t spray perfume around your penis.

    *NB*: For those who are not circumcised, in your case, please pull back the the foreskin and wash underneath with warm water everyday.

    Always remember, a clean penis is mightier than Goliath’s sword..

    Finally guys, please go for a quick check up if you notice any changes within your scrotum, this could be a sign of prostrate cancer.

    It’s common among men about and above 50 years of age.

    Credit https://www.facebook.com/DrDavid-Kakaraka-470637416792139/