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  • Stabbed To Death After Fleeing Domestic Violence Relationship

    On 27th December 2010 I arrived back from the Next Sale forgetting to buy my husband paracetamol for his headache on the way home. It caused him to lose his temper in-front of my two daughters & three step-daughters…by this point we had been together for ten years and it was a familiar scene…that day I left, like I had done so many times before, only when I arrived at my mums this time I called the police.

    Two officers arrived and watched my husband frantically circle my mums flat in his car & they listened to the constant voicemails where he screamed “Why are the police there? Why are you talking to the fucking police? Think about what you’re doing”.

    They then heard the voicemails change to him sounding calm and rational saying “Come on baby. It’s a row. Just come home. I love you”….

    If it hadn’t have been for the patience and time those police officers gave me that day I wouldn’t have made that statement. I wouldn’t have been honest when I answered their Domestic abuse risk assessment and I wouldn’t have agreed to let them be present at my marital home as I cleared out my belongings.

    And as my family and friends helped me clear out mine & my babies clothes I listened to him tell me he was sorry, in front of those Police officers. I listened to him tell me he would change this time and as he begged and his tears came I wondered if I was making a mistake – but those officers and that support network reminded me why I had made the choice I had.

    Afterwards the threats & abuse started – and some were carried out. My mum got investigated for benefit fraud, he attempted to destroy one of my siblings marriages with false accusations of infidelity, every single one of my friends were paid visits – my best friend saw him outside her house with a baseball bat in his hand, my car was keyed, my Managing Director walked into my workplace with our dog which he had found tied up outside & I was repeatedly assessed by social services for child neglect and abuse.

    I was stalked – he followed me in his friends cars so I wouldn’t recognise him and he hid in bushes outside my new home.

    And after the threats and abuse came the apologies and false promises….most of the above my eldest daughter saw and still remembers….

    …..and that cycle of abuse was as intense when I left that marriage as when I was when I was in it….and I was frightened. There were times I considered going back for an ‘easier life’ and there were times I accepted that I’d just be controlled forever.

    Today I’ve spoken to the mum of the stunning girl in this post.

    Faye.

    She was a thirty year old mum of three beautiful little girls…she left her husband after years of Domestic abuse. She had left him many times before – only this time it was for good..and as she got stronger being away from him he saw he was losing control.

    On Saturday 28th April he stabbed Faye to death.

    Her mum will now try somehow and continue to live without her daughter, her friends and family are left destroyed and one day her babies will learn that their Mummy died under the most horrific cruel circumstances.

    Right now, this month, seven women be murdered in our country by a current or former partner.

    This is the exact reason Domestic abuse needs to be highlighted.

    It’s why every agency from our schools to our Police force need a full understanding of Domestic abuse to support men; women and children to leave and remain safe.

    Faye – I am so sorry – I am devastated we have lost another mum, friend, daughter – another amazing woman who should be waking up tomorrow to do the school run.

    Please help smash the target here to somehow help towards Faye’s babies futures: https://www.gofundme.com/5hkcti0

    #justiceforfaye

    Credit Facebook page Part-Time Working mummy

  • When Your Baby Makes An Early Arrival

    This is one of the only photos that I have where I look pregnant.

    This was ten days before our sweet boy decided to join us, fourteen weeks before he was supposed to.

    If I could go back in time, I would tell myself to push harder the first time the doctors ignored my concerns. I would tell myself that everything would be okay, and that I would make it through.

    But nothing, not even the advice that I would give the old me, can prepare you for the NICU. Everyone’s journey here is SO different, there’s absolutely no way that anyone can tell you what to expect.

    When I see the new moms get wheeled up here for the first time, my heart breaks for them. I want to just hug them, and tell them that I know exactly how they feel. Their birth plan had gone out the window, their “perfect labour” didn’t exist. Their brains are still foggy from the medication, and their baby… the only thing on their mind… that sweet baby… is in the best hands.

    I remember the surgeons telling me that I would be out of the OR ten minutes after Jameson left. I laid on the table, arms stretched out, for what felt like years. Come to find out, it ended up being a little over an hour. I sat in recovery until I could move my toes, and I concentrated SO hard, I knew that I had to have had enough muscle memory to move a stinkin’ toe! They let me go early, because I wouldn’t leave them alone about it. They let me see our miracle baby for 25 minutes before I was wheeled back to my room, to wait until I could stand. The nurse walked in a few hours later and asked “do you think you’re ready?” I immediately stood up, and blood went EVERYWHERE. “Woah, you weren’t supposed to stand up yet!” But off to see my boy, I went.

    I understand, Mama. All that is important is that sweet baby. The pain killers, uterus massages, pumping, it can wait.

    When Jameson was just a few weeks old, the doctors had “the talk” with us. If you’re a micro-preemie parent, I’m sure you know exactly what I’m talking about. That heart-sinking moment when medical professionals come to tell you that your child may not make it. The choices that you are forced to make are unimaginable, and they will eat you alive, regardless of what that choice was.

    We have signed consent forms, giving strangers permission to operate on our son. We’ve seen him cry (we haven’t heard him, yet), we’ve watched him get poked, you name it.

    I’ve watched syringes of strangers blood get pumped into our son to keep him alive.

    I’ve seen 10+ nurses running as fast as they can to our baby’s bedside to give his little two-pound body compressions, and stimulate him to keep him responsive while they put a tube back down his throat.

    I slept on pull-out chair for weeks, and ran off of bags of chips and coffee.

    I’ve cried, boy have I cried, and I’ve let my ugly out on a lot of people who didn’t deserve it.

    But, I’ve also had months to celebrate the small things.

    I won’t ever be upset when Jameson pees on me, because that means his urinary system is finally deciding to function properly.

    I’m not mad when I smell like puke, because he’s finally off of TPN fluids.

    I got to kiss my boy at three days old.

    I got to dress him once he was a few months.

    We got to give him his first “big boy bath” at six, and Gigi and Grandpa Greg finally got to hold him at five.

    These are things that are taken for granted, that I will never ever let go unnoticed.

    The point of this post is to tell you this: Although our journey has been long, and it has been filled with a lot of ups and downs, we are not the only ones. Please, please be considerate when you’re talking to moms with special babies. They are miracles, regardless of their needs. I know that sometimes it’s not “normal”, and if you have questions, ask! Please be patient with us and our crazy rules, and our last-minute cancellations. But, please don’t be ugly to us Mama’s who have fought so hard for our babies. They are loved more than you can imagine.🖤

    Full credit goes to Keeghan Haight

  • I Am In Hell Because It Is Not My Baby

    Sitting in the labour and delivery room at the hospital with my sister. My mum, who is also pregnant, just showed up. I’m smiling, and carrying on conversations, but inside? I am in hell.

    I guess I’m a very selfish and mean person because I don’t think it’s fair. I don’t think it’s fair that I was the one who was actively trying to get pregnant, but instead God not only blessed one of my family members, but two with the gift that I had been praying for, for YEARS.

    I hate feeling this way. I am beyond happy for them, but at the same time I’m over here struggling to keep my composure and not burst into tears. It’s not fair that I’m the one who has to go through this pain. It’s not fair that each month I take dose after dose of medication and pray so fervently that God will bless me with a child.

    I changed my eating habits, I changed my lifestyle. This was supposed to be my moment, or like my moment, where everyone shows up to the hospital because they’re excited for the new baby. But it’s not. It’s not my baby, it’s not my moment, and I won’t even pretend to understand why I’m in this situation. I don’t see in just black and white anymore. I look around and I wonder just how many women are in my shoes.

    How many women go through the channels on tv and see a newborn baby on one of those nappy commercials, and you just feel your heart tear into pieces inside your chest. You can’t walk down the baby aisles because you know that if you buy it and it doesn’t happen yet again, you’ll be left looking at that item knowing that it’s still just an item and not YOUR baby’s. How many women have cried themselves to sleep at night because all they want is to start a family? I’m so happy, but I’m not.

    Here I am, listening to them talk and joke around, but I feel like the joke is on me and sometimes I wonder if God is listening to me. Please tell me i’m not alone.

  • Please Help Me My Teenage Brother Is Suicidal

    Please can someone help me. My teenage brother is suicidal. He’s been going missing from school and sitting in woods, fields and even cemeteries, he has been hurting himself and looking n the internet of ways to end his life he is only 13.

    He doesn’t speak for days on end and sleeps whenever he can, he is always looking down at the floor and doesn’t ever smile or laugh anymore.

    He broke down in tears yesterday after he was found in a different town during school hours. He says he sits and thinks about hanging himself in the woods or drinking bleach.

    My brother has always been a shy, quiet, kind-hearted boy, never in trouble but he is fully aware of right and wrong, three months ago he saw four 14-16 year olds pushing around a young child with learning difficulties, my baby brother stepped in and told them to stop.

    This is where it all went wrong, he was targeted not just at school but via social media, soon these teenagers were spreading vicious rumours about my brother and people believed them, so even when he was at home in his bedroom he was being bullied via hs phone.

    The school is offering support and the main bullies now leave him alone but the rumours are still there from other children, they cannot punish the whole school, my mum has taken him to the doctor and she’s now going to keep him off school so she can be with him, but what else can we do? How can I support him through this? We have taken away all his electronics so he can’t see what they are saying but now we feel we are isolated him even more, we cannot move, there is no money to go else where, please help us, how do we deal with this situation it is breaking our hearts that this sweet boy is being so hurt emotionally and we don’t know how to take it away

  • Don’t Marry A Health Care Assistant

    Don’t marry a Health care assistant. They sleep all day while you work and work all night while you sleep. Or, their 0500 alarm disturbs your sleep and then they come home too tired to cook dinner. Don’t marry a Health care assistant.

    They walk in the door mentally exhausted and sometimes forget to even say hello. Don’t marry a Health care assistant. They run out of patience and snap at the slightest question or demand. Don’t marry a Health care assistant. They constantly complain about germs or access for people in public. It can be embarrassing.

    Don’t marry a Health care assistant. Their stories are not dinner-at-your-moms appropriate. Don’t marry a Health care assistant. Your complaints of a sore throat will hardly be heard. Don’t marry a Health care assistant. They spend so much of their energy on their patients that they have nothing left to give to you when their shift ends.

    Don’t marry a Health care assistant. They don’t make you a priority when they agree to work on their days off Don’t marry a Health care assistant.

    They’re so emotionally unstable that sometimes they come home and just cry for no reason. Don’t marry a Health care assistant. They are constantly in crisis about where their life is going. Don’t marry a Health care assistant.

    Marry a Heath care assistant. They are brave enough to take on any challenge. Marry a Heath care assistant. They get up every day to put others first. Marry a Health care assistant. They have the best gut instincts to know when something is wrong.

    Marry a Health care assistant. They have felt with depths of their hearts unknown to most people. Marry a Health care assistant. They’re always ready to help someone in need. Marry a Health care assistant. They see things that others don’t. Marry a Health care assistant. They give their all and utilize every talent they have. Marry a Health care assistant. They know what it means to sacrifice. Marry a Health care assistant. They were brave enough to embrace a duty that never sleeps.

    Marry a Health care assistant. They have learned to adjust without complaining. Marry a Health care assistant. They are strong enough to hold back tears until they are alone. Marry a Health care assistant. They never settle for less than they are capable of. Marry a Health care assistant. They succeed in times of unknown.

    Marry a Health care assistant. They know the value of life. Marry a Health care assistant. They are the best comforters. Marry a Health care assistant. They know time is precious. Marry a Health care assistant. Those quiet moments truly are sacred. Marry a Health care assistant. Because if you have the chance to marry a Health care assistant, that means they are trusting you to help them carry a beautiful burden that you will never understand. Marry a Health care assistant.

  • Chemical Burns From An Innocent Fruit-Parents Beware

    Parents are advised to be careful this summer, quite often parents will enjoy a small glass of wine or an ice-cold beer in the local pub, whilst their children enjoy the out-door play area in the beer garden, the children are usually bought a lemonade or a fruit shoot and often parents will allow their child to suck on the lime that is placed on the side of their drinks glass or family, many families will have barbecues this summer as well and quite often have a margarita

    One mother allowed her small child to suck on the seemingly harmless fruit and within the hour her son was screaming in pain and had what appeared to be burns around his mouth and on his hands.

    The mother had allowed him to have this small slice of lime which comes from Mexico well it’s juice is toxic if left on the skin and mixed with sun. Therefore, it caused a chemical like burn to this small burn. 

    Any child or adult can get this chemical reaction with a lime and sun mix The resulting chemical reaction is called phytophotodermatitis , so if you do feel the need to suck on the lime juice ensure you wash any skin that has come into contact with the lime juice.

    This chemical reaction can happen to any skin color or type. The lime makes your skin reactive to ultraviolet light, typically UV-A radiation, which can penetrate glass. If you’re at the beach you should have lathered on sunscreen anyways but if you’re indoors you might not be aware of UV-A rays

    Symptoms include burning, itching, stinging, and large blisters can slowly accumulate. Symptoms usually begin within 24 hours of exposure and peak 48-72 hours after being exposed.

    To share your story or raise awareness of any topic (doesn’t have to be parent related) or to advertise please send us an email to mumsadviceltd@outlook.com

  • Had My Mum Listened To Doctors My Sister Would Have Died

    I’d like to tell you a story about Alder Hey…. My sister when she was 8 yrs old..was in that hospital and they told my mum .. It’s all in your daughters head, there’s nothing wrong with her, my mother insisted , demanded and banged her fist on the consultants table, I want you to do more tests she’s not putting it on, she’s in bad trouble and screams in pain with her neck, finally after months of them saying my sister wasn’t very poorly, she was found to have an inoperable tumour in her neck, she had to have chemotherapy, and my mother over heard a nurse saying ..”why don’t they let that little girl go home and die in peace” 😳

    My sister continued to have radiation treatment and finally came home but my mother was told she would not survive it, although my sister has had numerous health issues over the years because of the effects of radiation and another flare of cancer can I just say that my sister is now 72 and defied all their odds…. So even years ago they got it so badly wrong at Alder hey, can you imagine if my mum had of listened to them and given up!!!

    Parents if you feel that Doctors are wrong or you want more tests done do not just take a Doctors word for it, a mother’s instict is often right, some times even the most trained professional can be mistaken

    Credit Suzie Ria Smith

    To share your own personal story or raise awareness of any topic (it doesn’t have to be parent related) or to advertise on Mums advice Facebook page or website please email us at mumsadviceltd@outlook.com

  • Not Every Doctor Is Right They Don’t Know Everything

    This is my daughter Amelia, she was born at North Staffordshire hospital at 3.30pm on 23/9/2017 Saturday evening I was induced due to excessive fluid and spd.i had a horrible pregnancy when I gave birth to Amelia she was purple and could not swallow she was foaming from the mouth the midwives convinced me she had a strider to which I knew it was more as I’d previously had 2 children before.

    The midwife then left me and Amelia’s father alone for 1h45 minutes I rang the emergency buzzer as she was getting dramatically worse in her health, an intensive care pediatric consultant came for Amelia and rushed her to nicu where they went on to putting tubes down her nose, at this point the only way Amelia could get rid of her secretions was to be lay flat on her belly otherwise she would choke.

    At 10.45pm Amelia had further test done with the tube they tried to suck air out of her belly to which had no success they had no idea why this was happening so they ordered a scan, after the scan we were told Amelia was unable to swallow and that she could have a few different defects and that her life was 50/50, they couldn’t tell us for sure what it was she had and they didn’t know what to do or how to treat it as they had never seen this condition before, I never left amelias side in the nicu all that night they left amelia on her belly all that time with no proper Amelia’s care or diagnosis.

    At 1am a doctor came to me to tell me Amelia would either be moved to alder hey or Birmingham to get a diagnosis and fix the problem yes they called her a problem 😡 at this stage me and her father had no idea what to do we were both distraught 😩, a private ambulance came from Birmingham at 3am to collect Amelia and straight away knew what she had they were absolutely disgusted with how they had cared for her, they attached suction tubes in her mouth and oxygen down her nose, when arriving at Birmingham we were met by three surgical consultants who I must admit were lovely they explained everything in such detail they also noted that Amelia’s condition should have been picked up on my anti natal scan and I shouldn’t have had Amelia by natural birth and this could have killed her I should have had a planned birth with them.

    At 10am Sunday morning aged 10 hours Amelia went down to have a major operation at this stage we know she has tracheo-oesophageal fistula/ distal esophageal atresia, when Amelia came out of her operation 8 hours later it was a huge success she spent 3 days in intensive care.

    While in intensive care Amelia would not wake up this was due to the amount of pain killers and sedation she was on, one doctor of the intensive care ward ordered Amelia to come off all drugs and sedation and to replace these with paracetamol, the surgeon also ordered Amelia to be weaned of the ventilation within 24 hours otherwise she would become dependent.

    When they put Amelia on c-cap she sat very low on all oxygen levels and heart rate they said this was due to the 3 days Amelia was on the ventilation that it causes respiratory distress and can also cause bacterial pneumonia so she was on very strong antibiotics the whole time we spent in the hospital.

    Moral of the story not every doctor is right not every doctor can say what they have, we don’t have enough medically trained specialists, every child deserves a chance and If it wasn’t for Birmingham Amelia certainly would not be here now.

    Credit Abbie Richardson

  • Tom-Alfie’s Dad You Are A True Hero

    Tom-Alfie’s Dad You Are A True Hero

    Regardless of what you might think of Alfie’s dad Tom Evans…. the way he might come across .. there are men out there who do not give their kids the time of day, refuseto support them financially, emotionally or even visit them.

    But this 21-year-old lad has fought with everything he has got … followed every possible avenue . When there where no options  left, he finds one. He has Left no stone unturned all for the love of his young son.

    *Raised funds to fight the decision in court

    *Challenged the government many times without giving up

    *Created massive support by the people and created Alfie’s army

    *Support from and met the Pope

    *Organised treatment in Italy

    *Backing from European Parliament

    *citizenship in Italy for his child

    *Has a military plane on standby

    *Effected a whole city like no one single person has before

    *And never took no for an answer

    All this whiles his child is sick and with no experience

    At 21

    And I take my hat off to him.

    You fought so hard for little Alfie unfortunately Alfie lost his fight but I am sure he is looking down on you with such pride, you give dads a great name

    #Tom You Hero 💙

    We all know you only get strength like that from having an even stronger woman by your side! ❤💯👌🏻

    Credit Louise Rance

    If you have your own story you wish to share, want to raise awareness of any  topic (it doesn’t have to be parenting related) please send us an email to mumsadviceltd@outook.com

  • IUD Contraception Nearly Killed Me Woman Beware

    Sometimes things happens in your life and you don’t know why. You question yourself why me or what did I do to deserve this? But what you should be asking is what can I learn from it.

    I’m finally coming out to tell my story because I feel like I can help someone. I’m not here for people opinions but to simply tell my story.

    Six weeks after I had my daughter I was offered by the doctors a form of birth control called the IUD. I accepted because I was told that it was safe and it was he best type. It had never gave me any problems up until November of 2017. I had it for 3 years so far. I was told that it is good for 5 years.

    I went to my yearly check up in October and I was asked about birth control and I told that I had an IUD. They checked and told me that they couldn’t find an IUD and that it may have fallen out but I knew for a fact that wasnt the case.

    They sent me to get two types of ultrasounds the same day and I was told once again that they didn’t see an IUD.

    One day in the beginning of November I was at work I had a sharp pain and the bottom right of my stomach and the first thing that popped in my head was is this that IUD? But I tried to brush it off but the pain was getting worse. I left work 3 hours early to go to the hospital.

    I went to the hospital and I told them what was going on and what the doctors was telling me so they immediately sent me to get an X-ray done. The doctor came in the with a weird look on her face and said the IUD is definitely in there but it’s pushed up in your stomach so you will have to get surgery.

    She told me to call my OBGYN to schedule a date. I went and talked to my OBGYN, told him everything that was going on and even showed him the X-ray picture that they allowed me to take. So he also said I have to get surgery.

     I asked him how would they would get it out and he told me they would cut me right under my belly button and use a scope. On December 13th I went in to get the procedure done. Instead of 1 , I was cut 3 times. One under my belly button and one on each of my side. They were able to get it out but it was broken into pieces. I was told that it had moved up to my liver.

    When I left the hospital I was bleeding but my mom was told that it was normal. Over night I begin to bleed heavier and the pain got worse. I was rushed to the hospital by ambulance and once I got to the hospital my mom told the doctors everything that was going on.

    They rushed me to x-rays done and then rushed me to surgery. I was bleeding internally. After the surgery my mom was told that when they open me up, my ovaries was black and that they had to give me a hysterectomy.

    After the surgery I went into septic shock causing me to be in ICU for a few weeks. I died on that surgery table. While in ICU my organ began to fail. I was on a breathing machine, I was on dialysis cause my kidneys wasnt working right.

    Everything that could possibly go wrong went wrong. My parents were told that I was the worst patient on the floor and that they didn’t think I was going to make it. But with faith and God the prayers that everyone sent out, I am here today. Next week I have to get myself prepare again for a second surgery to get my toes amputated but I swear I came so far and im not letting anything stop me.

    Full credit goes to Tania Smith

    Graphic pictures below

    IUD Contraception Nearly Killed Me Woman Beware
    IUD Contraception Nearly Killed Me Woman Beware
    IUD Contraception Nearly Killed Me Woman Beware
    IUD Contraception Nearly Killed Me Woman Beware
    IUD Contraception Nearly Killed Me Woman Beware
    IUD Contraception Nearly Killed Me Woman Beware
    IUD Contraception Nearly Killed Me Woman Beware
    IUD Contraception Nearly Killed Me Woman Beware