Category: Our stories
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Lazy Parents Are The Best Type Of Parents
Lazy parents are the best So I’ve been called a lazy parent because I do very little in and around the house, but I do I really do you just can’t see it.
I don’t wash up like EVER, my children do, they have learnt how to delegate who does what, one washing, one drying and one putting away. I don’t work out my bills my 12 year old does our household budget, he’s learnt so much and can ensure we have enough money to cover everything, I have kids who switch off lights and don’t keep the tap running when brushing their teeth.
The kids work out the meal plan for the week and help write the shopping list, they have learnt about needs and wants, healthy and unhealthy and how a balanced and tasty diet doesn’t need to cost a fortune.
My kids can change beds, they can fix the wi-fi when it stops working, add screen wash into the car, use a washing machine, run a Hoover and balance a bank account.
So all this makes me lazy does it? Actually I think it makes me a pretty good parent, one day my children will move out and they will be able to run a home, surely it is my role as their mum to teach them more than just maths and English. Let’s face it how often do we use algebra in our day-to-day life, why are we so quick to do for our kids and not teaching them life skills.
I work hard teaching my children but you can call it lazy if you like. Before anyone jumps on me, my children are enjoying their childhoods their tasks take very little time, they play football, go horse riding and play the awful game fortnite, splash in the pool and are normal well-rounded happy kids plus their mum is always happy and ready to play or go on little outings as I am not exhausted or stressed out and neither are my kids.
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Guy Gets Death Theats After His Post On Reddit
Guy gets death threats after his post on Reddit.
We have kept his name private to prevent more repercussions.
The man said ” My girlfriend was beaten and raped I broke up with her after she told me, here’s what happened…
we had been dating for 7 months and she wanted to go to a sleazy club with her friend, I told her I did not want her to go, we had a huge argument about it, she was like “you don’t owe me I can go and do what I want”, I told her clearly if she went we were over and I would be breaking up with her, she said she wouldn’t go and we both dropped it.
Along came saturday and I hadn’t heard from her all day, at 4am on sunday she calls me crying, she says she was beaten up and raped, she had only gone to the bloody club against my wishes.
Apparently she left with some guy and his mate to go to another party, they took her some where and took their turns with her.
I told her we were over, she screamed down the phone at me that she needed me and that she was sorry, I simply told her not to call me again.
She broke my trust went somewhere I told her not to, was probably going to end up cheating on me anyway and im meant to feel sorry for?”.
The reddit user was sent thousands of death threats and promptly deleted his post and account, but some shockingly agreed with him stating that she was told not to go there and she shouldn’t have left he club with the guys.
It is never the victims fault for a rape, if someone says no it means NO, it doesn’t matter if they had consented earlier, were flirting etc if they change their mind you have to accept that.
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Just Because I Fancy Your Child Doesn’t Mean I’ll Touch Them
Just because I fancy your kid doesn’t mean I’m going to hit on them, rape them or kidnap them. Yes I find little girls aged between 5 and 8 attractive doesn’t mean I will hurt them though, I am sure everyone fancy someone but it doesn’t mean you snatch them off the street or touch them inappropriately, if we did I am pretty sure there would be far more sexual harassment cases especially in the work place.
I have a normal life but have a sick fantasy which I will never ever act upon.I know the value of a child’s innocence and will never harm a child. I see a therapist who helps me to control my urges, I stay away from areas with children In, I do not look at images of girls.
I am open that I have these urges and will never be alone with a child. I know I’m wired wrong and wish I didn’t think the way I do, but I can’t help it, it’s a mental health condition in my eyes, but the pedophiles who act out there urges need to be locked up.
I do not support pedophiles although I am one, what I’m trying to say is if someone tells you they are a non-offending pedophile please give them the time of day, we who fight our desires should be treated with dignity .Each day we fight our wishes, each day we control our urges, every minute we wish we were different.
I have been beaten in the street, I have had to move 5 times in the last 3 years, I am no different to you fancying Tom Hardy or Beyoncé etc, just because you fancy them doesn’t mean you will act upon them.
Sent in to us via email by Neil Aaron Stehle f Southampton
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Fortnite Save The World Game Nearly Killed My Son
Fortnite nearly killed my son, George is 13 and has always been a big gamer, so when Fortnite came out he was elated, a fab game he could play with his small group of friends. George has always been a quiet boy, shy and struggled to fit in at School, but when he was gaming he came alive and beamed with joy.
George asked for an extra game called Fortnite save the world, I happily paid the £25 fee and George was very grateful. George spent a month building guns and gathering resources, soon his friends went off on a week long school trip which George didn’t want to attend.
After a few days of his friends being away he realised how lonely he felt whilst gaming so he started playing with strangers. I did keep an eye on it and ensured he was only playing with kids of a similar age. In the game you can swap resources, George made the error of trusting someone who asked to see all his weapons etc and George dropped them, the other person stole all his online stuff.
To many this may not seem like a big deal, but when your child has worked so hard for something and it’s his safe place where he can feel alive and be himself, it really is a huge issue.
I could hear George begging for his stuff back and this other child laughing his head off over the mic, mocking my sons distressed sobs. George lost all his stuff, but he lost more than that he lost his happy place. I tried my best to comfort my sensitive son but he was adamant he wanted me to leave his room, he became angry, I thought it best to let him calm down and check on him later.
I left it an hour and knocked on his bedroom door, no reply, I knocked again, still no answer, I screamed his name, again silence, the door was locked, I hammered and hammered on it before kicking it open.
There lay my baby boy with a plastic bag over his head, he had cellotaped the opening around his neck, I ripped at the bag, freeing my sons air ways, I rushed to call the emergency services, placing them on load speaker whilst I gave my baby cpr.
My son wasn’t gone he was still there he was barely breathing but it was life, my boy was alive.
10 minutes later the paramedics arrived and he was rushed to hospital. It’s been 2 months since George attempted to take his life, he sees a therapist and all his gaming is limited to off-line games unless I am sat with him.
Please remind your children that it is just a game, not to put to much of their time or energy in to it, gaming should be fun, when it starts taking over STOP, step back, please don’t let your child become obsessed with gaming.
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This Is What Depression Looks Like For Me
This is what depression looks like.No. Not the clean dishes.
But that there were that many dishes in the first place; that I’ve gone 2 weeks without doing them. 3 days ago I sat on the kitchen floor and stared at them while I cried. I knew they needed to be done. I wanted to do them so bad. But depression pulled me under. It sucked me in. Like a black hole. Rapidly, sinking quick-sand.
I walked by them morning and night and all day long. And just looked at them. Telling myself that I could do them. Telling myself that I would. And feeling defeated everyday that I didn’t. Making the depression only that much worse because not accomplishing something that needs to be done is failure. Worthless. Failure. Piece of shit. Incompetent. Stupid. Lazy. All things that roll through the mind of someone with depression.
All. Day. Long. Throw anxiety on top of it, and you’ve got yourself a real treat. Being scared your husband will leave because he thinks you’re lazy. Being scared to let people into your home because they’ll think you’re nasty. Feeling like you’re failing your kids because for the 3rd night in a row you don’t have any clean dishes to cook dinner on.. so pizza it is. Again. And the worst part of it all, it’s not just with the dishes. The laundry, cleaning, dressing yourself, taking a shower, dressing your kids, brushing your and their teeth, normal everyday tasks. It all becomes a nightmare. A very daunting task.
Somedays it doesn’t get done at all. Depression is something that “strong” people don’t talk about because they don’t want people to think they’re “weak”. You’re not weak. You’ve been strong for so long and through so many things, that your body needs a break. I don’t even care if the only thing you did today, was put deodorant on. I’m proud of you for it. Good job. I’m in your corner. I’m on your side. I’m not looking for sympathy, not in the slightest. But I am letting everyone know that I’m here for you. I get it. If you need someone to talk to, I’m always here to help.
Full credit goes to the amazing Brittany Ernsperger
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Just A Carer Is What People Think Of Me
Just a carer?
I am just a carer
That’s what people think of me,
It isn’t very pleasant,
They’ve seen it on TV.
Blood and guts and vomit
Sickness and diarrhoea.
They wouldn’t want to do it,
It isn’t a career.
But I have been a carer
Since the day that I left school.
I haven’t been to college,
But I’m really not a fool.
Caring for the elderly
Is more than making tea.
It needs a special person,
And I know this is for me.
When you have dementia,
when you’re getting old.
It can be very lonely,
When you’re left out in the cold.
It needs a special person,
One who really cares.
One who lights the room up,
When all around are stares.
Someone very patient,
Someone very kind.
Someone who will lead you
When you’re going blind.
A wealth of understanding
And time to listen too.
You won’t be able to do it,
If all you think about is you.
The job is quite a privilege
That others do not see.
When you finish work today,
Did you think of me?
Did you know I sat with
Someone taking their last breath?
Do you know how precious those moments before death?
Do you know how hard it is
To say goodbye and then,
Go and help the other folk
And do it all again?
Do you know how good it is
When you get a smile,
From someone who is down and low
When you’ve gone the extra mile?
Caring is a way of life
Judge us if you must
But we are not just carers
We are magic fairy dust!
To share your story or to raise awareness of any topic or to ask us to do so on your behalf, or to find out our advertising prices then please send us an email to mumsadviceltd@outlook.com
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Punched, Threatened & Humiliated That Was My 9 Year Olds Reality
Punched, threatened, excluded and humiliated; that was my daughter’s reality at just nine years old.I was sick of watching her slowly destroy my daughter. The worst thing was the lack of support. Teachers would tell me they hadn’t seen anything, everything was fine at school, or even worse, there’s nothing more we can do.
I’d wake with waves of anxiety flooding my body. The guilt of not being able to protect my little girl was immense.She was too fearful to speak up. I began to be known as the mum who always complained.She remained quiet and well-behaved. I got angrier, exhausted and absolutely sick of being intimidated and shamed for speaking up.Thankfully the bullying went too far even by the school’s standards – there was mention of a knife being brought to school the following day. No need to explain that the very next person I spoke to wasn’t the school, wasn’t any of the professionals that had let us down for so long, I phoned the police.Would it actually have happened?
You’d like to think not but even the child’s mum told me she wouldn’t put it past her daughter to do it just to prove a point. Did things change after that? Yes, but it was temporary. It didn’t take long for the sleepless nights, tummy aches and anxiety to take over our lives again but it did stop eventually, and permanently this time.
It wasn’t any one thing that made the bullying stop and it certainly wasn’t anything the school or the bully did! In a nutshell, it was just that WE had had enough, not in a tired, beaten, frustrated way but in a ‘my boundaries are rock solid and I’ll do what it takes to enforce them’ kind of way. And in that moment of clarity was what it took to make the bullying stop. I was beyond hoping the teachers would help. I’d lost complete faith in the adults I had entrusted my daughters care to.
My daughter had learned the hard way that adults aren’t always there to protect you and they don’t always know best!It was Christmas Day evening. The day had been great yet come bedtime my daughter was in tears. Not because she was over excited and tired but because it had dawned on her that she was halfway through the school holidays and we were now on the decline towards the return to school. And she was scared.
The fear of being bullied is bad enough but to know that you’ve to face that alone because the adults who are meant to look after you aren’t, would be enough to tip anyone over the edge. Something inside of me snapped. I wasn’t angry. I wasn’t even resentful. I was determined.I looked my daughter in the eye and gave her permission to do whatever she needed to do to make this stop. I told her she could hit back if she needed to. I told her she could scream, shout, argue with the teachers, do anything to make sure she was safe at school. And I promised her that no matter what she did, even if the teachers told her off I would back her.
Actually, I told her it would be a good idea to really kick-off because then the teachers might call me into school, and they might start to see how terrified she really was, how much she was hurting.That was the turning point. Looking back I think that moment was a culmination of things that resulted in my daughter realising her own strength. One reason is that I believed in her ability. She knew I really understood how much others had let her down and how unacceptable that was. She felt how determined I was and that I was completely behind her, 100%, no matter what. She felt heard, understood and ultimately I think she needed permission to not be the good girl who kept putting up with the crap because the adults around her told her she ‘just needed to ignore it’ as if she was making a big deal of nothing.
I tell you what when your child tells you they don’t want to live their life anymore, there are no words. I only wish the teachers had taken us more seriously before it had got to that point.The good news is that we did make the bullying stop and my daughter is thriving. We learned so much from our experience, and for that I am grateful.Through our experience, I recognised the gaping hole where easily accessible, immediate advice and support should have been. So once our lives were back on track I volunteered for a bullying helpline but after 4 years I didn’t feel I was doing enough.
I needed to provide what we had been in desperate need of, and so my business was born, supporting parents in protecting their kids from bullying. All parents are welcome, whether their child is being bullied, has been bullied, worries about being bullied, or they are the one who is bullying.
I never want to hear of a family so isolated and unsupported that they feel there’s just no option but to put up with it or hide. Bullying is not okay and you know what? The bystanders are just as bad as the bullies! In the words of Benjamin Franklin, “Justice will not be served until those who are unaffected are as outraged as those who are.”If bullying is something you worry about you can find me and other parents who understand in our free group on Facebook, The Mums Hub (https://www.facebook.com/groups/574353102769101/) , my Facebook page (www.Facebook.com/gemmaehills), or you can email me at contact@gemmahills.com. No judgement just understanding.
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This Is What Depression Looks Like, No, Not The Clean Dishes
This is what depression looks like.No. Not the clean dishes.
But that there were that many dishes in the first place; that I’ve gone 2 weeks without doing them. 3 days ago I sat on the kitchen floor and stared at them while I cried. I knew they needed to be done. I wanted to do them so bad. But depression pulled me under. It sucked me in. Like a black hole. Rapidly, sinking quick-sand.
I walked by them morning and night and all day long. And just looked at them. Telling myself that I could do them. Telling myself that I would. And feeling defeated everyday that I didn’t. Making the depression only that much worse because not accomplishing something that needs to be done is failure. Worthless. Failure. Piece of shit. Incompetent. Stupid. Lazy. All things that roll through the mind of someone with depression.
All. Day. Long. Throw anxiety on top of it, and you’ve got yourself a real treat. Being scared your husband will leave because he thinks you’re lazy. Being scared to let people into your home because they’ll think you’re nasty. Feeling like you’re failing your kids because for the 3rd night in a row you don’t have any clean dishes to cook dinner on.. so pizza it is. Again. And the worst part of it all, it’s not just with the dishes. The laundry, cleaning, dressing yourself, taking a shower, dressing your kids, brushing your and their teeth, normal everyday tasks. It all becomes a nightmare. A very daunting task.
Somedays it doesn’t get done at all. Depression is something that “strong” people don’t talk about because they don’t want people to think they’re “weak”. You’re not weak. You’ve been strong for so long and through so many things, that your body needs a break. I don’t even care if the only thing you did today, was put deodorant on. I’m proud of you for it. Good job. I’m in your corner. I’m on your side. I’m not looking for sympathy, not in the slightest. But I am letting everyone know that I’m here for you. I get it. If you need someone to talk to, I’m always here to help.
Full credit goes to the amazing Brittany Ernsperger
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Internet Gets Manager Sacked Who Has No Compassion
Crystal Reynolds Fisher posted some screen shots of text messages she had sent her manager at the convenience store where she worked, Crystal explains that her son is still on LIFE SUPPORT so would be unable to come into work, you would think the only reply would be of compassion and love. Crystal wrote along side the screen shots
“so my son is on life support and i tell my boss 48 hour before I am due to work that I will not be able to work until my son is off life support and this is what she tells me”.
Internet Gets Manager Sacked Who Has No Compassion
It unfortunately gets worse and Dawn clearly doesn’t have an ounce of goodness in her soul.
Internet Gets Manager Sacked Who Has No Compassion
Dawn still doesn’t care
Internet Gets Manager Sacked Who Has No Compassion
Ok Dawn is heartless and totally unprofessional but the internet on this one occasion isn’t, the post received thousands and thousands of replies and shares and the company which employ Crystal in Albion Michigan saw it.
The Food Mart posted on their Facebook page “we would like to follow-up on the issue brought to our attention recently regarding how an employee time off request was handled by one of our managers. We investigated and have found that the situation was handled improperly and without the compassion that we value as a company. For that, we are very sorry.As a result of this finding, we took quick action and that manager is no longer employed by PS Food Mart. We have also reaffirmed to our employee that she will be able to take all the time off that she needs during this difficult period. We’d like to thank the public for their concern”.
We are pleased to hear the company dealt with this situation quickly and we hope that Crystals is on the road to recovery.