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  • No one Turned Up To His Birthday Party

    PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE can I ask for your help to make my little mans birthday on July 15th one to remember this year rather than one to forget!!
    PLEASE READ, help if you can and SHARE!!

    This is Ben, my son, he is 10 and has high functioning autism,.

    He has a heart of gold and just wants to be friends with people but his autism makes it extremely difficult for him to achieve this.
    High Functioning Autism makes him a little different to the rest of his classmates and because of it he is often kicked and punched and is called nasty names amongst other things, none of which are good.
    He is the child that never gets invited to other children’s birthday parties, that sits alone in the playground, that doesn’t have anybody round for tea and nobody to go out to play with.
    On a previous birthday I hosted a birthday party for him, inviting around 25 children. He was so excited and really looking forward to it.
    Only two parents replied to the invitations I sent out but the party was arranged and paid for and Ben was excited about it so there was no way I could cancel it, I wrongly presumed that a few more would just turn up on the day but at least two were coming which was better than none at all.
    Everything was set up and Ben sat there eagerly waiting for everyone to turn up. 2pm came and went and nobody had arrived.
    Ben sat there saying repeating over and over they will come in a minute won’t they mum. He still thought they would show up to help celebrate his special day.
    By 2.30pm he was getting more and more anxious and visibly upset, he kept asking me where everybody was. I just didn’t know what to say to him. It was obvious at this point that nobody was coming!!
    It was the most heartbreaking moment ever not only for me but for him to. This day had a lasting effect on him for a very long time, he was devastated, it knocked his self confidence, heightened his anxiety and is something he will always remember.
    This year I want him to have a birthday to remember and hopefully undo the damage of the previous birthdays which has had a lasting effect on him
    Can I ask you from the bottom of my heart if you would kindly consider sending him a birthday card for his “11th” birthday to put a big smile on his face and make this birthday one to remember for the rest of his life!!!
    If you can help, cards can be sent to:-
    Ben Jackson

    35 Dunn Close

    Southsea

    Portsmouth

    PO4 9TX

    UNITED KINGOM
    If are unable to send a card could I ask you to share this post far and wide please.
    Thank you so much
    Lisa x

    (Ben’s mum)

  • What All Carers Wish They Could Say

    Yes I am a carer, yes this is my job. Don’t come in here and shout at me because your mums not out of bed, I know you want her up at 7 but we have others who need us to.

    I’ll get to her as quick as I can but shouting will not do.


    I haven’t had a break but I won’t let your mother wait.

    I’m sorry she isn’t wearing the new pink dress she didn’t want it on, don’t tell me I am stupid and I don’t understand.


    Yes I know you want what’s best for mum, but so do I, you want her to make the appointment to have those tests done,but your mum is dead against it she has a say you know.


    Don’t complain about me I’m doing the best I can, I can’t go any faster and can’t always stick to the plan, I know you want to leave at 8 but I can’t rush your mum.


    When your mum Is crying in the night it’s me who holds her hand. Your mum is so lovely and makes my day so bright, I wish you saw me daughter and all that I do, so stop the constant digs and realise I am human to.


    Don’t come here once a month and tell me what to do, this is not just a job I really do care, I worry when your mum is ill or hasn’t finished all her meal.


    Your mum is well cared for, I don’t want constant thanks but please get off my back and let me do my job.


    Please family member come see what we do, most carers do their very best and will always try to listen to what you want, but speak to us kindly and ask us why, don’t assume we are lazy or just don’t really care. 







  • SEX POSITIONS TO HELP GET YOU PREGNANT!

    SEX POSITIONS TO HELP GET YOU PREGNANT! 

    If you’re struggling to conceive or trying to conceive below we’ve listed the top 10 sex positions which can boost your chances of getting pregnant.

     

    1) Your old favourite classic, the missionary or as some like to call it ‘boring vanilla’. I’m pretty sure you don’t need me to explain this position but for anyone who is clueless its basically the woman underneath with her legs open. (P.s add a cushion under your bum to tilt you slightly for a deeper penetration!) The man will be on top of you with his arms holding his weight and he will control the movements.

     

    2) Doggy style (woof woof!) You either love or hate this position so if it’s not for you don’t panic you’ve got another 9 positions to choose from! This is self-explanatory, get on all fours like a dog and let your man take you from behind. Don’t forget that back arch! The man will hold your hips to control the thrusting and your welcome to help him along by rocking back and forth.

     

    3) Reverse cowgirl (Yeee harr!) it’s not quite like a cowgirl however do feel free to dress up like one if you fancy spicing it up. Your man will lie on the bed, and you will sit on him facing away from him so your bum is basically in his face. It’s your turn to control the movements on this one so just push up and down.

     

    4) The toad (yes, it’s an unusual name for a sex position) similar to missionary the only difference is you wrap your legs around your man and place your feet on his bum to guide the movements. It’s a very simple position but great for intimacy.

     

    5) Bandoleer (I have no clue why it’s called this but just role with it) get on your back and bring your knees to your chest just like if you were suffering from trapped wind and was trying to release a few farts. Put your feet on his chest and he will put his forearms on your knees. You can just place your hands on his thighs if you want. If you want him to go deeper just pull him in by his thighs. Bonus points in this position…the G spot gets all the action! As your man presses your knees down the pleasure increases. Sounds fun!

     

    6) The Hound…yet again what is with these sex positions relating to dogs. Anyway, the hound just like doggy style you’ll be getting on all fours but just lower yourself so your resting on your forearms instead. The man will like usual penetrate you from behind while, if he wants, cupping your boobies.

     

    7) The peg, if I’m honest it more like ‘the plank’ you’re basically planking on top of your partner. Get him to lie on his back and you lie on top of him controlling the movements. If you’re lucky enough to have a man with a big package this position will allow him not to penetrate you too deeply.

     

    8) From behind. Well unfortunately this is a boring name unlike the rest. Find a wall or some sort of object you can lean on and your man will stand up right and enter you from behind while holding on to your thighs.

     

    9) The grip. This one is good for getting deep! Place a cushion under your bum to raise your hips slightly. Move your pelvis from one side to the other. Your partner can go deep if you’re brave enough.

     

    10) The eagle…. As the saying goes ‘Spread eagle’! Get on your back and spread those legs up high, the man will kneel in between while holding your legs up (what a gentleman, otherwise you wouldn’t last long in this position you’d get leg cramp) this position is fantastic for going deep while the man can have a full view of what’s going on. Cushion under your bum is optional.

     

     

     

    These are my top 10 sex positions to help you along with the road to pregnancy…but please enjoy sex! Don’t make it a chore or routine, let loose in the bedroom, go wild and just enjoy yourselves. After all once you have little people running around you’d be lucky if you even get the missionary position!

  • Don’t Walk away

    What do you do when you feel like everything is against you, that your constantly sad but you don’t know why.

    That the only way to feel is to drink or to cut.

    When your friends and family are all bored of hearing about how your feeling.

    You know you need help but have no where to turn, your doctor just wants to give you pills, but all they do is dull your senses.

    When all the advice people give you is “you’re better off than others”, “cheer up a bit”, “have you tried being happy”.

    No shit Sherlock do you really think I chose to feel this way?

    What people need to understand is no one with depression wants to feel down or have self loothing.

    Listen to them, support them, and be there for them, do not walk away, do not assume they are attention seeking, love them, help them and be a constant shoulder to cry on 

  • Meningitis-Know the facts

    April 16th 2006 at 7:53pm my beautiful baby boy was born, i already had a nearly 3 year old daughter and now my family was complete.

    It didn’t matter to me that once again I was single I had coped alone with my daughter and I will cope alone with them both.
    We got into a routine quite quickly my son was feeding every 2 hours, would be awake for about 30 min and would sleep for the rest of the time I thought I had it made.

    Summer was fast approaching so one day along with my sister and some friends took our children to the park where there was a paddling pool as it was a really hot day. I didn’t think anything of my son sleeping all day as he still woke for feeds and nappy changes he was only 11 weeks old little did I know what the next 24 hours would bring.
    The next day my son was still sleepy had been all night and was slowly taking less and less in his feeds so I went over to see my mum. We tried getting him to have water and he wouldn’t. His temperature was slightly high and at that point he started to scream a sound I will never forget. The more he screamed the hotter he became to the point my skin was red from holding him so I decided to call primary care as I knew in my stomach something wasn’t right.
    The nurse on the phone told me to give him some calpol and gave me an appointment for a couple of hours time. I did as I was told but it didn’t help so I took him off to the hospital.
    When we saw a gp he didn’t know what was wrong so sent us to the larger hospital in the closest city to get him checked out. I was petrified and all I could think of was he’s got meningitis and is going to die.

    He didn’t have all the symptoms not even a rash but I just knew it. We got to the hospital about 20 min later and the amazing staff took over. They gave him some calpol then we managed to get some liquid into him and after doing some test decided to take him for blood tests and a lumbar puncture.

    When he came out the room with the nurse my worse fears were confirmed my son was covered head to foot in a purple rash even without the test results I knew and I had never been more frightened in my life.

    A doctor took me to the parents room to talk as other Drs and nurses started treatment to save my son’s life telling me the next 24-48 hours were critical.

    I genuinely don’t know how I managed to get through those hours sitting by his bedside seeing all these tubes coming of my son, not being able to cuddle and console him just praying that he made it through. I was offered a priest to bless him incase he didn’t make and I struggled not to break further.

    12 hours after he was admitted my son opened his eyes and smiled as I called a nurse she took his temperature and noted it had come down a little. He wasnt feeding so had a drip in for fluids but for me that decrease was hope.
    Over the next 24 hours the medicine was doing it’s job the rash not so strong and the temperature slowly coming down. After another 12 hours he had a feed- a real turning point and I knew he was going to make it.

    It was hard when the nurses changed his canula as he would smile and when I asked why the said “all he knew was pain and that’s the only human contact he can really have” that moment broke my heart . my son continued to get better and better defying the odds and 2 weeks later became an out-patient.

    Nobody could believe that this 11 week old baby boy who was ready to be given his last rites was leaving childrens ward. It was 2 years before he was completely given the all clear. I now have a gorgeous, cheeky, happy and most importantly healthy 11 year old getting ready to start high school in september. Its true what they say “you don’t know how strong you are until it’s the only choice you have”

    [youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FHLWnlrmKNg]

  • Domestic Violence-story-HELPLINE

    Living with domestic abuse…
    In 2001 when I was 16 I met some one who I fell instantly In love with.

    He was 6 years older than me, had a good job and was charming and good looking.
    After a few months I moved in with him (he had his own house).

    That’s when I found out he was into Cocaine.

    Over the next year I managed to get him to stop using it, which was great.
    Within a year of us being together I had several warnings from people about him, 2 were his ex partners.. telling me he was controlling abusive etc

    Did I listen? Of course not, I was a 17 year old naive girl, who was head over heals in love!
    End of 2003, he was out with friends, I stayed home, but at 10.30 I needed to nip to the shop, as I got back 10 min later he had just got home, he dragged me up the stairs calling me a whore and “he knew” where I had been.

    That was the first time he became aggressive. Of course the next day it was “sorry” “love you” blah blah
    Few months later we were both on a night out, one of my male friends from school was there, I hadn’t seen him for months and were talking about his mum and dad, well steven** didn’t like that, so when we got home, he hit me and told me to leave, I had nowhere to go, so refused, he dragged me in the garden and locked me out in my strap top and pants, my neighbour heard me, so I pretended that I had got my self locked out.
    Surely by this point I should have left? But I loved him.
    Over the next year small things happened, but then I found out I was pregnant. I was so scared. I wanted to leave but I didn’t have any one or any thing. So I stayed.
    But steven** changed. He couldn’t do enough for me, told me he loved me every day stopped drinking.. could every thing be ok? I believed it could so we decided to start fresh.
    **ethan was born in 2005. He was tiny but beautiful, and **steven was an amazing dad.

    We moved house in 2006, then it started again, the names, a slap here and there.
    In Aug 2007 we went out for his work Xmas party, his cousin was baby sitting

    At 11 I wanted to go so he got his best friend to drive me home. He got home about an hour later. I was holding ethan* as he had woken upset. The next thing I know I was being dragged to the floor kicked and punched with my baby in my arms! Thank god ho cousin was there, she called the police, and he was arrested..

    This last incident gave me the strength to leave because my baby was so very close to being hurt by him.
    I was heart broken .
    10 years on I’m happily married with 3 more children to a man that respect me, loves me and would not even raise his voice. There ARE good men out there.
    Remember, you may not feel strong now, but one day you will, there are decent men/women out there who are not abusive, who respect you, who will love you like you deserve!
    Here are some numbers if you ever need help.
    24 hour national domestic help line:

    0808 2000 247
    Samaritans

    116-123
    **names have been changed

  • What If He Tries To Rape Me Again?

    I think my relationship may be about to get abusive … it started when I stupidly did not discourage a male from being sexual with me over social media

    It was wrong of me and I know that.

    I stupidly allowed my PND and low self esteem to take the better of me in that situation

    My thought was

    “You’re fat and ugly, your partner thinks the same too”

    So when another male showed sexual interest I allowed it

    While I did encourage him, I didn’t discourage him either

    And that was wrong
    My partner found out..

    My partner

    My lover

    My saviour

    My BEST FRIEND
    He’s hurt. Of course he’s hurt and I have nobody to blame for that but me

    How could I ever hurt him like I have ?!

    How could I ever have been so fucking stupid???
    We spoke and I thought things were somewhat sorted between us

    I knew the trust would be hard to rebuild

    I know because he’s shattered my trust before

    More than once

    But that isn’t the point.
    He wanted to have sex in the utility room, I said no

    He pushed and pushed and forced his penis inside of me

    Without consent
    Is this rape?

    God knows I deserve it
    I got out of that situation unharmed, I went outside to avoid him for a while

    Came back, and he acted as though nothing had happened
    Cue bed that night, he again tried to initiate sex

    I complied, it’s the least I can do after betraying his trust

    The sex was rough, I didn’t enjoy it. But I allowed it to continue regardless

    Half hour after he finished he wanted to go again, again I complied
    It was this time when he strangled me, I couldn’t breathe.

    I justified it in my head “he’s upset, he wants to hurt me without actually hurting me”

     

    I mentioned it the day after

    He “didn’t realise he had done it”

    Ok, not to worry
    We spent the day together and had a good laugh,

    I hadn’t laughed like that in such a long time

    We had such a good day together as a family
    Again, back in bed that night he brought up my infidelity

    We spoke, I asked if he wanted to hit me, I felt like I deserved it.

    He was horrified I even suggested such a thing

    “Id never hit a woman, EVER”

    I apologised

    He again initiated sex

    He wanted anal, I refused

    That didn’t stop him

    He forced himself in me once again

    And despite my screams and crying he continued

    I tried to get away, he held me in place while he continued to force sex
    I again, thankfully managed to get away

    I ran, I was so distraught, I ran to the bathroom

    But there is no lock

    So, naked, scared and still crying I ran to my car

    I drove away

    I had nowhere to go. I’d left my phone so couldn’t ring anyone for help

    And stupidly, all I wanted was my partner. The man who was my everything
    But also the man who he caused me to be in this situation
    I returned home, he was looking for me

    “Are you ok?”

    NO, no I am not

    “You wanted me to hurt you”

    Not like that …

    he didn’t understand my point of view
    I returned to bed and put some clothes on

    What if he tries to rape me again?

    What if this is the start of an abusive relationship?

    Is this what I deserve?
    He acted like nothing happened. And went away to work in the morning

    Will tonight be better? Only time will tell?

    I know everyone will read this and think

    “Why stay?! Take your children and leave!”

    But I can’t, it isn’t who he is.

    He’s an amazing man, and my entire world

    Thankfully I can recognise that what has happened the last two nights is wrong

    If it continues, I’m gone.

    But for now. I’m hoping he will be the man I love

    The caring, affectionate man
    I’m hoping this is his way of getting his frustration out for what I’ve done to him

    I’m hoping this is the end

  • The worst thing about bed wetting isn’t changing the bed

    If you’ve ever had a bed wetter you may relate.

    My 7 year old son wets the bed regularly we have seen an incontinence nurse who has prescribed numerous medications and changes we can make with no avail.

    i don’t mind changing the bed!!!

    Heres some of the things i find worse.

    1. My son is always sore
    2. He feels like a baby wearing pull ups
    3. He’s embarrassed
    4. He wont go on sleep overs
    5. School trips away give him anxiety
    6. The house always has a slight smell
    7. Bed wetting is expensive (bed mats, pull ups, duvets, mattresses)
    8. People are always trying to tell me how to cure it
    9. Limiting drinks feels cruel
    10. My washine machine is always on

    So yes im sure my son will one day grow out of this but at the moment it feels never ending.

     

  • PARENTS NEED TO STOP DOING THIS

    Don’t teach children to be scared of the police

    It’s quite common for parents do use the police as a caution when their children are misbehaving.

    “that police man will take you away if you don’t stop that” is something they might say.

    But is this actually the right thing to do?

    While children should be aware that the police do deal with bad people who break the law, they also need to know that the police are here to help. That if they are ever in a position that they need help they can go to the police for it without fear.

    What is your view on this?

    Should parent stop this practice or are people reading too much into it?

    Let us know in the comments.