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  • The Loneliness Creeps In

    Say bye to my husband as he goes out to work. Take the eldest to school. Just me and the 2 year old again. Alone.

    What shall we do today? All alone.

    Farm? Soft play? The park? Just us. I wonder if anyone fancies a brew?! But who is there to call?

    I’ll just do some jobs, have a brew. What time is it? Shall we head out and get back for dinner? Where shall we go? Just us.

    The loneliness creeps in. Should I ring my husband? No he’s busy at work, I mustn’t disturb him. Who shall I message?

    I’ll just scroll Facebook and maybe the gram. See if anyone’s about.

    Should I message that mum from school? No she’ll be busy. You only know her to chat to, will she even want a brew?

    We play some games. Read a book. Shall we watch some telly? I’ll just scroll Facebook again… get some contact with the world. Something other than these 4 walls.

    Now it’s dinner time. Maybe someone will be around after school?

    Hi are you in this aft? x

    No sorry.

    Ok x

    Why what’s up?

    Nothing (not strictly true), was just seeing if you were free for a brew. x

    No I’m not sorry.

    Hi what you up2?

    Just in town.

    Ahh ok.

    Why?

    Just seeing if you were in and fancied a brew.

    Are you home?

    No I’m at work.

    It’s just me, the toddler and these 4 walls today. There’s always tomorrow.

    No-one messages, maybe it’s me. Maybe no-one wants to meet us. It’s ok. I’m ok. No adult company today. The loneliness is creeping in.

    We pick the eldest up from school. If I’m lucky there might be a parent about for a chat. Only I can’t hold a full conversation as the youngest is clinging off me, running about. I need to keep my eye on her.

    We go home and there’s now 2 little voices to contend with.

    By the time my husband gets home from work, we’re eating tea. He joins us. We chat about nothing much. I’m exhausted.

    Exhausted from being lonely.

    There’s always tomorrow for some company.

    The days blur. The loneliness sinks in. So much so that even after you’ve had company, you still feel lonely.

    You stop asking if people are free. You stick to the 4 walls, your kids and your brew.

    It’s the loneliness that numbs my brain. Does it numb anyone else’s? No conversations to make me think, to make my brain whir.

    I forget how to interact with people. I can’t make new friends. The ones I’ve got don’t have time to meet up, why would anybody new? It’s ok. I’m ok.

    The loneliness sinks deeper into my skin.

    There’s always tomorrow.

  • Can We Talk About This Character For A Second

    Can we talk about this character for a second? Lottie was Tiana’s best friend and growing up together she was the one that always got what she wanted.

    She was spoiled but she was always there for her friend. Even grown she always looked out for Tiana from cleaning her up at the party while dancing with who she thought was the prince, to kissing a frog so Tiana can have her happily ever after.

    She didn’t resent Tiana for “stealing her crown” but instead she was at their wedding with tears in her eyes smiling happily as her best friend was walking out with the man she loves.

    Charlotte is one of the best characters in Disney history and I believe if there were to ever be a sequel to The Princess and the Frog, she should get her happily ever after. I think she would be a wonderful addition to the Disney Princesses and would be a wonderful role model for little girls who grow up getting everything, but teaching them that true love and friendship is so much better than any materialistic possessions.

    Truly an amazing woman and an ideal character!

    Walt Disney Animation Studios

    Credit https://www.facebook.com/aubrie.vasquez.3

  • When The Kids Start School I’ll Get So Much Done

    ‘When the kids all start school, it’s going to be so good, you’ll have so much time on your hands. You’re going to be able to accomplish so much’, they said.

    —

    All that freedom I thought, I’ll be able to finally get rid of the clutter in my house, redecorate, make it lovely. I started.

    —

    Make delicious home cooked meals, make my own bread, kombucha, kimchi, cakes, my own butter. I did for a while.

    —

    Really get into my online subscription box business, all that time to pack boxes during the day. I did for a bit.

    —

    I’d start a fitness routine every or join a gym. Yeah I didn’t do that bit.😂

    —

    I’ll go to the cinema on my own every week. I’ve been a few times.

    —

    I’ll finally be able to run all my workshops I’ve been planning from my newly spruced up home. See above (it’s not been done)

    —

    I’ll become the most organised efficient person, I’ll have a cleaning schedule, a laundry plan, maybe I’ll start ironing again. I don’t even need to say this bit do I?

    —

    However, It turns out that after 17 years of always having small people at home with me I have no idea how to manage the empty space. I’m lonely and slightly grieving those times.

    —

    I started off ok in September, starting lots of things, I found a day friend, I prepared big meals, I started the jobs, the festive season came along with lots to do. But then back to the space

    —

    But what noone tells you is after having constant companionship every day that when that is gone you have to face yourself, deal with things you pushed aside, deal with the loneliness of sometimes going the whole day with no other human contact. It’s a lot like when you first have a baby, you realise there is a lot of quiet time to fill. This time you don’t even get the little squish to snuggle with.

    —

    I’ve not heard people mention what happens in this bit. Needed still but differently. Still many logistics to handle.

    Overwhelming feelings about all the things I could do followed by the realisations that maybe I actually don’t want to/don’t have to do them. Suddenly I have too many new choices.

    —

    I will get used to it, I know I’ve much to be grateful for but I needed to acknowledge these unexpected feelings today.❤

  • If You Are Unlucky Enough To Know What These Are

    So if your unlucky enough to know what these tablets are, then I don’t have to describe to you what this post is regarding. But if you don’t I will fill you in.

    That medication allows me to deal with a normal day to day life. Although most days it leaves me tired, spaced out and emotionless. Crazy right? 🤷🏽‍♀️🤦🏽‍♀️ Why would anyone want to feel like that. Well this is why.

    You see I suffer from depression and anxiety. Let me start by saying, I don’t have suicidal thought .My depression is Simple things like relationships and friendships become so trivial, so complicated.

    In my brain it doesn’t sit right, something seems different. I notice little differences that ‘normal’ people wouldn’t notice.

    That comment you didn’t tag me in, but you tagged other people? I saw that, why didn’t you tag me? What’s up with me?

    You read that message, I saw you did, but you didn’t reply.. why didn’t you reply? Have I done something to upset you?

    You didn’t say I love you on the phone.. do you not love me anymore? Do you love someone else instead?

    They just made a comment about me. Was it a joke? Was I supposed to laugh? Or do they mean it? Are they being nice? Are they talking about me? Do they talk about me? I bet they don’t like me really.

    And for all those questions I will spend hours trying to answer. Let it all build up in my mind, until it sends me to tears…… it’s mental that isn’t it!!! That I see things that way.

    It’s not only mental changes, but physical changes. I don’t eat a lot, mainly rubbish, because I need it now and I need the energy from lack of sleep. Insomnia, up all night answering questions to situations that don’t even exists. or sleep to much and waste half my day still feeling tired.

    I still smile and I have every excuse for when you ask why.

    But the tablets help me.

    Because I know when I start to feel this way or think this way, I need help.

    I know that when my behaviour starts to change, I need guidance.

    And I understand that I don’t need to be ashamed. I don’t need to be understood. I just need to be accepted. Everyone is fighting a battle and sometimes you need to be kinder.

    So I may just be another blogger who’s talking about mental health. But this is the reason for my silence. For my lack of enthusiasm.

    And to my family and friendsI love you and I’m grateful, because living with this illness is hard, but trying to understand it, is even harder.

    Don’t suffer in silence.

    #speakout

    MAJOR CREDIT TO: Confessions Of A Forces Housewife. ❤️

  • Breastmilk It’s Magic

    Someone commented on one of my posts recently stating that breastmilk isn’t magic. Well actually it is.

    Breastmilk is powerful. It’s love, it’s food, and its medicine. It attacks cancer cells, stops E. coli in its tracks, and destroys MRSA Infection from spreading. It contains cells otherwise only found in embryonic tissue.

    It contains stem cells currently being used to treat Alzheimer’s , Parkinson’s, Diabetes, and being studied for Regenerative Medicine. It has antibodies and contains millions of white blood cells. It is living and breathing. It produces its own food to feed the living bacteria found in itself (yes you read that right). It is made from nothing yet contains everything.

    It is different during the day then it is at night. It changes hour by hour customizing itself to your child’s particular need at every moment. Science can’t explain it and mankind can’t replicate it. 👊 #keepboobin #normalizebreastfeeding #milkitivity

    Follow Milkitivity on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/milkitivity_/

     

  • Diabetes It’s More Deadly Than I Ever Knew

    I wanted to bring awareness to something I didn’t know ANYTHING about and it’s more deadly than I ever knew.

    Type 1 diabetes!

    My son (23 month olds) 2 months ago was diagnosed with T1D and I didn’t know the signs at all. I want to help prevent DKA (Diabetic ketoacidosis, can be fatal if not treated, coma, swelling in the brain) or low blood sugar (untreated, severe low blood sugar can be very dangerous. It can result in seizures, loss of consciousness, or death) if I can.

    The ONLY SIGN my son showed was peeing a lot. He would wet through his clothes and his bed within a 2 hour period. When we brought him in his blood sugar was 462 (normal should be 100-180 depending on age of child) and was borderline DKA. We had to stay 2 nights and 3 days in the hospital to learn about our new normal. We had to also take a test at the end of our days to see if we could take him home with us. T1D is not a joke.

    And no he didnt get it from eating to much sugar or junk food. T1D is an autoimmune disease that he will never outgrow.

    If you are experiencing any of these with you child PLEASE get them checked.

    Credit https://www.facebook.com/cassie.terry.14

     

  • You Aren’t Required To Give Birth In A Hospital

    You aren’t required to give birth in a hospital. Did you know that? You’re allowed to decide if a birth center, hospital or your home is the best choice to birth your children.

    You have the right to make choices that you feel are in the best interest of you and your babies. This is your body and you are their parent.

    Do your research. Put together a birth team who will support your wishes and help to educate you on your options. Trust your intuition. You are the conductor of this experience and your birth team is there to help YOU.

    This strong mama knew that she could birth her gorgeous twin girls at home. She put a team together to support her and received incredible care from local OBs along with the prenatal care of her homebirth midwife. She met each milestone necessary to have a homebirth and at 37 weeks and 4 days brought these sweet little ones into the world. Her strength inspires me as she fought hard to keep these babies safe until they decided it was time to enter the world.

    Congrats to a wonderful family and please give a warm welcome to these girls who are already so loved.

    It was such an honor to document.

    XOXO,

    Stacey

    www.cincybirthstories.com

     

  • As I Walk Through The Aisles Of Death At The Supermarket

    A poem from my heart:

    If you only could hear what I hear

    If you only could feel what I feel

    As I walk along those aisles of death in the supermarket

    Do you ever look beyond the clever packaging?

    Beyond the fairy happy-tales of animals who supposedly willingly were killed

    Humane slaughter is all a lie

    Animals do not want to die

    These are aisles of intense suffering and death

    Aisles of crushed dreams,

    children mourning their parents,

    and parents mourning their children

    These dead bodies should all be in a cemetery

    Yet, I see people buying these bodies,

    living individuals ripped apart at a young age

    It is not food, it is violence

    Milk is not food for us, it is the nourishment which was intended for a calf

    But forcefully she was taken away from her mother,

    ignoring her intense cries;

    and ignoring the cries of his/her heart, saying:

    Please don’t hurt these beautiful beings,

    respect their deep heart wish to be together

    And if you buy that milk, you are closing your eyes, and heart,

    from their heartache, pleas and deep emotional suffering

    Think of if someone forcefully took you away from your mother when you were a little child

    Treat and respect others as you want others to treat and respect you

    It is time

    To shop with your heart,

    your eyes and ears

    Their suffering will only stop

    if you listen to your heart and shop with your heart

    Choose green kindness – a vegan diet –

    instead of a diet that robs other beings of everything they have

    Choose peace. Be kind. Be vegan

    Be kind, be vegan, learn more here, http://befairbevegan.com

    (Photo credit, Captive pig photo from www.djurfabriken.se , Free pig photo from Gotlands djurfristad)

    Credit https://www.facebook.com/anders.branderud

     

  • This Is The Exact Moment I Realized

    ” of all the photos I posted from my daughter Malia,

    This one makes me more emotional because it shows the second exact I realized she had down syndrome.

    The moment he was born and cleaned it, I asked: ” has down syndrome?”

    Nobody heard me, so I asked: ”

    It’s all right?”.

    I felt guilty that these were my first words, even without someone hearing them.

    When they put it on my chest the first time, I took this picture and entered a kind of limbo.

    I wasn’t ashamed in any way… but the photo was somehow, I don’t know what word to use… revealing? A Confirmation?

    Every time I wanted to post a picture of her, I was back to see this first picture.

    I thought the world out there wasn’t going to answer as I wanted. But I love this photo more than anyone can imagine.

    The reason I’m finally posting it now is that if there’s someone out there who listens to this diagnosis, before or after birth, I want you to know that everything is fine. Maybe not at first, maybe not for a while, but everything will be fine.

    Among all the parents who could have had, his baby chose you “.

    Text and photography @thedsdn

     

  • Stretch And Sweep Is Sexually Violating You

    What you need to know because your care provider won’t tell you …

    If there was one ritual I’d like to see banned before 40 weeks, it’s the stretch-and-sweep, aka membrane stripping.

    The routine stretch-and-sweep is performed during a vaginal exam at any time beginning around 37 weeks. Mothers are seldom told it was done. And rare is the mother who is actually given enough information to make a wise decision. Even if she declines this heinous procedure, it’s often done without her consent (which is called sexual assault outside of the obstetrical/midwifery clinic). I’ve heard from hundreds of women over the years who were ritually violated and suffered the consequences.

    A stretch-and-sweep involves having the provider’s gloved fingers manually stretch open the cervix and then strip the baby’s amniotic sack away from the cervical opening. The baby’s amniotic sack is normally adhered to the opening of the cervix in a way that prevents infectious agents from reaching the baby. It’s one of pregnancy’s many safe-guards.

    It’s believed that manually dilating the cervix and separating the sack from the opening of the cervix will release extra prostaglandins that could stimulate labour.

    Only prostaglandins don’t trigger normal labour. It’s a hormone that ripens the cervix. It’s actually the baby’s lungs that trigger labour when they secrete a protein just when they’re ready for air-breathing. Then oxytocin from mama’s brain brings on contractions.

    A membrane stripping is intended to “prevent induction”. What your provider is saying to you (if they tell you) is:

    “I will perform a mechanical induction to start labour artificially so that you might avoid a chemical induction after your due date with IV oxytocin in the hospital.”

    Yes. A stretch-and-sweep is an induction that is meant to “prevent” induction. It is meant to bypass your baby’s lungs and all of the safety mechanisms of human birth to get the baby out before the baby is ready.

    It hurts.

    It makes you bleed.

    It can cause your water to break meaning you now are expected to go to the hospital for a chemical induction.

    It can introduce infection.

    It begins non-labour, disorganized, painful, non-dilating contractions most of the time.

    Your provider will say that you are in labour with these induced painful non-dilating contractions.

    You will be sent to the hospital for augmentation and may end up with a caesarean for failure-to-progress.

    It’s a crappy way to have a baby.

    Some studies say that doing a membrane stripping doesn’t shorten pregnancy. Other studies say it can shorten pregnancy by a couple of days. All studies say it introduces many risks to you and your baby. It’s a crappy way to have a baby.

    And since many providers won’t tell you that they’re going to sexually violate you and put you and your baby in harm’s way, you must not only decline a stretch-and-sweep (which is often ignored – hello criminal offence) but also decline every vaginal exam prior to labour. Those exams have no benefit, give you no useful predictive information and introduce many risks. i.e. keep yer knickers on and yer knees together!

    And for those who had a glorious stretch-and-sweep and had a baby a day later (yup, I’ve heard from at least 4 in the last 30 years amidst the several hundreds who have had crappy births), you’d have had the baby anyway. And I’m beyond happy that you had a good experience as most women don’t.

    #pregnancy #whatyouneedtoknow #stretchandsweep #membranestripping #membranesweep

    Credit https://www.facebook.com/herbalistmomma