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  • The Unneccassary Touch Must Stop

    The “impertinent and unnecessary” touch in week 37 (or 38, or 39… 41)

    Nothing disgusts me more than taking advantage of the vulnerability of a term pregnant.

    Making a vaginal touch before the beginning of labor does not offer any advantage, it does not predict when you will be in labor and only increases the risk of infections, produces fear, uncertainty, loss of confidence in the woman, in addition to being completely exposed to Professionals without criterion perform the maneuver of Hamilton (Mechanical method of childbirth induction)

    Just out of curiosity, I got to read some of these online magazines for pregnancy, to go groping the information they deliver about the touches in consultations with the obstetrician in recent weeks.

    And I’m finding myself with a big surprise. Hundreds of women stranded, anxious, full of doubts and lamenting the imperfection of their bodies because with 37 or 38 weeks ” the baby was still not fit ” ” it wasn’t dilated or a little ” ” the baby is too high ” And there are not few who, in addition, leave the consultation with a hospitalization order for caesarean section or induction. No touch should be made before the start of labor! Their bodies are perfect for birth, hormonal signs of the body and baby have not yet triggered. I wouldn’t have to have dilatation or baby fit. You have to have patience and a lot of support of some doula, some respectful midwife, the couple well informed, but who encourage her to trust her body knows how to give birth and at her own time.

    But we continue reading stories of obstetric violence. Many women mean that they made a very painful touch and came out bleeding from the consultation. Most likely it was a Hamilton maneuver, without before explaining the risks and waiting for your authorization or consent.

    That is a serious violation of the rights of us as patients and we must denounce them. Let’s go, don’t play with our bodies.

     

     

  • stop barking

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  • when you stop being shy

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  • Attention All Road Users-Horses and The Law

    ***Attention ALL road users***

    Imagine this…. You’re driving to work and you’re running a bit late so you take a short cut down a side street or country road. You are going quite fast and you notice a horse and rider up ahead. The road is fairly straight and you can see there are no oncoming vehicles so you only slow down slightly in preparation to pass.

    As you approach the horse suddenly side steps/jumps into the middle of the road, you’re going to fast, you slam on your breaks but it’s not enough, you close your eyes and hope for the best, you hear terrible crashing sounds and breaking glass then….. silence. Are you still alive? Did the horse and rider survive? You have a lot more protection than them and you can feel that you’re injured. Now you’re going to be really late for work, if you even get there. You could lose your driving licence, maybe face jail time for death by dangerous driving.

    A horse is an animal with its own instincts and reactions. A horse is a flight animal that WILL run from anything it perceives as a danger/predator. Horses were our mode of transport long before cars were even imaginable. The horse in the above scenario could have spooked for a number of reasons; a pheasant bursting out of the hedge line, suddenly noticing an animal or farm machinery in a field, a farmer or hunter shooting a rifle, a low flying aircraft, even the sound and vibrations from the car approaching too fast.

    It’s not practical to expect all horse riders to stay off the roads and quite frankly that’s a very selfish and childish attitude to have, after all they were on the roads long before your car/van/motorcycle/truck was. If you encounter a horse and rider while out driving please be cautious and courteous and pass wide and slow when it’s safe to do so. Please also pay attention to the rider and any hand signals they make as they can usually see more than you can. Take a moment while you relax at home to look up a horse riders hand signals and what they are telling/asking other road users to do. Also imagine that it’s your child or a family member on the back of that large, strong animal. It could save a life and that life could be yours.

    ***ADDITION FROM SINNIE KYLIE CURRIE***

    You don’t want a horse stuck in your windscreen repeatedly kicking you in the face either.

    Also By QLD GOV law at least – vehicle drivers must stop at the side of the road and turn off their motor if a horse rider signals that their horse is jumpy or agitated. The horse rider can signal to the driver by raising a hand and pointing to the horse. The driver must not move the vehicle until the noise of the motor, or the movement of the vehicle, won’t aggravate the horse….so I’m guessing it’s still illegal to hit a horse with a car…again in QLD anyway.

    That is for those who don’t care about the animal as they will care about the possible charges, fines and insurance issues.

    Roxy Clark

  • stop and look close

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  • we must stop them

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  • STOP FORCING YOUR CHILD TO BE SOMEONE THEY’RE NOT, BECAUSE THEY WILL GROW UP TO RESENT YOU

    STOP FORCING YOUR CHILD TO BE SOMEONE THEY’RE NOT, BECAUSE THEY WILL GROW UP TO RESENT YOU

    Let’s address this not-so-problematic problem that keeps popping up here and there then, shall we?

    Buckle up, folks, because this is going to be a long one.

    Now… I consider myself a good parent I suppose – I love my children, I cook healthy meals, I clean, I educate them, I encourage them to help around the house, I make sure they know right from wrong, that they’re polite, kind and are thoughtful of other people around them.

    I’ve also taught them that they can be whoever they want to be because I will love them no matter what… which is how any parent should feel, correct?

    Incorrect. (Apparently)

    I once (well, maybe a few times) allowed my son to dress up in pink and leave the house because he loved the colour and it made him feel good. In turn, that made me feel good that he was comfortable and happy expressing himself around me, and more importantly, he was totally okay with being himself around other people because, you know, that’s what we constantly preach to others, right?

    Wrong. (Apparently)

    As true as I’m writing this now, I got a truck load of shit for it and I couldn’t understand why.

    “Why are you dressing him up as a girl?! You have a daughter to dress up!”

    “Do you want him to grow up being confused?” 

    “People are going to make fun of him! You’re sick!”

    Can we just get one thing straight, here?

    The people and parents who behave this way are the ones damaging our children psychologically, not us.

    I know this because I’ve been there.

    My father wanted me to do ballet, I played football. I had to be quiet in his presence, I wasn’t allowed to express myself through fear of him being embarrassed or being punished for it.

    I was bullied for most of my life because I had no voice; I didn’t know who I was then and I still don’t now… because someone I looked up to told me to keep my mouth shut because of what others would think.

    I developed a personality disorder, Body Dysmorphic Disorder and an eating disorder because I had to be someone I wasn’t.

    I was a pressure cooker waiting to explode and I’m now a product of everything my father hates which has a strain on our relationship and any other relationship I’ve ever had.

    I’m ‘damaged’ so to speak.

    So, back to where I was – I couldn’t give a flying fuck what my children want to leave the house as to be honest, because if they’re HAPPY then that’s all that matters.

    My son has his nails painted, he wears makeup sometimes and pushes a pushchair around if he feels like it, because, actually, one day he may be a father.

    You wouldn’t laugh then, would you?

    He was invited to an Elves and Fairies party recently and guess what he wanted to go as?

    A fairy.

    Would he look at another child and laugh for how they’re expressing themselves? Absolutely not – he’d join in because I’ve taught him that we all express ourselves in different ways and that there is no right or wrong in how we dress, what we wear or what we’d like to be when we grow up because it’s how we treat people that reallycounts.

    My son asked for two birthday parties this year – one where he could be himself and one where he had to pretend to be someone else because he knew other people wouldn’t ‘approve’.

    I was gutted for him.

    All he wanted was to have a good time – he shouldn’t be having to lie and make such grown up decisions at such a young age, just because one person had told him that “boys don’t behave that way”.

    For as long as he’s with me, he can be whoever the fuck he wants and that’s not going to change. He knows that, my daughter knows that and I’ll take on anybody who disagrees.

    So, to the parents who teach their children to laugh at other children, to encourage racism, hatred and snigger at others… FUCK YOU.

    YOU are what’s wrong with the world.

    Children don’t know hate, racism or mocking someone for being ‘different’ unless we tell them and I refuse to enforce that upon my children just because the majority of the population are uncomfortable with being different.

    I know how this affects children because I was one of them – I’m sure as fucking hell never going to put my child through that.

    Why would anybody want to?

    Encourage your children to be different, be their number one fan, cheer them on, even if it makes you feel slightly uncomfortable because they need you to be there for them emotionally.

    You are all they have and if they don’t have you, who do they have?

    The Unicorn in Black

    Please following the amazing writer at The unicorn in black https://m.facebook.com/theunicorninblack/

    https://theunicorninblack.com/2018/11/01/stop-forcing-your-child-to-be-someone-theyre-not-because-they-will-grow-up-to-resent-you/

  • Please DO NOT Buy My Kids Toys For Christmas

    Please DO NOT buy my kids TOYS for Christmas..

    – Kid wants toy for Christmas and talks about it all the time.

    – Kid opens toy for Christmas and immediately rips it open and starts to put it together & play.

    – 2 days later kid is asking for new app on their iPad, and you suggest they go play with that awesome toy they wanted so bad that cost santa over £100… They say they don’t feel like it and are bored with it.

    – One week later, toy is shoved in the back of their closet, never to be seen again… UNTIL you do a pre-Christmas clean out the following year when said toy is then donated because the child expresses that she no longer likes it.

    .

    AH, it kills me a little every time!!!

    .

    This year, we are making a Christmas list filled with EXPERIENCES, not toys.

    .

    Want to know what Aunt Emily can get her? A movie date with her on a weekend, a trip to the zoo, a painting class… something where they can spend time together!

     

    .

    Live far away? You could give my son a swimming lesson vouchers, a gift certificate to a pottery painting class, cooking lessons, go carting, a favorite book of yours with a personalized note of why you love it & him THE EXPERIENCES and MEMORIES he simply will NOT forget!

    .

    No big pile of presents will be under my tree, if I look back on my childhood I don’t remember any of the presents I received, I remember the people, and my little girl and boy will remember the days out, the special times with their family.

    Not only will my children have the best time, I will not have the stress ans anger of searching shops to get the toys they want and then the heart ache of seeing money literally bein poured down the drain.

    This christmas will be all about family and my kids having the best time.

  • Things Need To Change In Uk Care Homes

    I think it’s time to get things changed in care homes to stop abuse and neglect happening to old and vulnerable people who cannot stand up for themselves.

    Care homes need cameras in them ALL OF THEM, to protect residents and staff, they need to be graded as to what level of dementia they can care for.

    Dementia itself needs to be graded so that people are not placed in wrong homes, the staffing levels need to be considerably higher and finally the people working in them need to be vetted more than they are now. Also the owners need to stop making such huge profits because that is all that concerns them .

    So please share to get support I can then go back to the health minister to try to get things changed. Don’t forget you or someone you love might be next

    Credit Ray Ann Lewis

    An investigation by the Daily Mail found four in ten UK care homes had failed inspections in 2017, with residents being forced to live in filthy and squalid conditions, and some locked in bedrooms without any natural light, food was basic with limited nutritional value, paper work was also not accurate.

    Of the 5,300 UK care homes inspected in 2017, 2,314 were dubbed as inadequate or in need of improvement, which is shocking.

    Staffing levels need to increase, better pay, more appreciation, training and shorter working hours would help things.

    Lets stop care home abuse NOW!!!

  • Where’s The Mum Village In 2018?

    Where’s the village in 2018?

    Anytime a mom vents and says “I just need a break!” Someone has to follow it with “well you had them “they’re your responsibility”.

    Says the person who back when your generation was having children, had family and friends that would actually be your “village”.

    ➡️ There is no village in 2018 ⬅️

    Maybe sometimes when us moms mention we just need a break, it’s because we’re teetering the edge of mental stability & going to a crazy place. It’s not because we don’t love and cherish our kids, trust me we do. Sometimes we just need an hour to clear our minds and have a reprieve.

    Women just need a little break but are too scared to ask because of the remarks they receive. Then when something happens, those same people say, “well why didn’t you ask for help?”

    You see, she did ask. You told her they were her problem. So she never asked again. She cried in the shower begging someone just to help.

    Be careful of your words. Lend a hand. Yea, they are “her kids”, but if you are her friend or family, if you love those children and they mean something to you, why does it inconvenience you to take time out of your life to make memories with those kids? While at the same it’s helping mom have some time or help mom & dad strengthen their relationship?

    Let’s bring the village back and stop shaming parents for needing a little time to themselves.

    Full Credit Megan Noelle Powell

    Do you want to share your own true, funny, heart breaking or inspirational story? Are you trying to raise awareness of any topic (doesn’t have to be parent related) or would you like us to do so on your behalf? Want to find out our advertising prices for our Facebook page or website? If so please send us an email to mumsadviceltd@outlook.com