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  • Raising Kids Is Hard, But Them Growing Up Is Harder

    When you first have children they talk about the challenges of parenting….the struggles of a baby waking in the night,

    the toddler who won’t stay in their bed, the cost of childcare, injuries from sports…

    Having to take off work to pick them up from school when they don’t feel well, helping them with homework, a messy house, the never-ending laundry, the cost to buy school clothes, packing their lunches….

    You watch their eyes light up on Christmas morning….and try to soak in the magic of those moments.

    You coach them in sports, rushing to practices and ballgames…and tote them all over the country to let them play the game they love…no matter how exhausting or expensive it becomes.

    Life is just so busy that you rarely even stop to think what the end of those days look like.

    In fact, it’s not really even something you can wrap your mind around.

    You go into it thinking that 18-20 years sounds like a long time….

    Then suddenly hours turn into days…days into months…and months into years.

    That little person that used to crawl up next to you in bed and cuddle up to watch cartoons…suddenly becomes this young adult who hugs you in the hallway as they come and go.

    And the chaos and laughter that used to echo throughout your home….gets filled with silence and solitude.

    You’ve learned how to parent a child who needs you to care for and protect them….but have no clue how the whole “letting go” thing is supposed to work.

    So you hold on as tight as you can…wondering how time passed so quickly…feeling guilty that you missed something….

    Because even though you had 20 years…..it just somehow doesn’t seem like it was enough.

    You ask yourself so many questions…

    Did you teach them the right lessons?

    Did you read them enough books as a child?

    Spend enough time playing with them?

    How many school parties did you have to miss?

    Do they really know how much you love them?

    What could I have done better as a parent?

    …..When it’s time for them to go, it all hits you like a ton of bricks.

    And all you can do is pray….hope….and trust that God will protect them as they start to make their way into the world alone.

    Parenting is by far the most amazing experience of your life….that at times leaves you exhilarated….while others leave you heartbroken.

    But one thing is certain…..it’s never enough time…💕

    So for all the parents with young children…who’s days are spent trying to figure out how to make it through the madness…

    Exhausted day in and day out…

    Soak. It. All. In.

    Because one day….all those crazy days full of cartoons, snuggles, sleep overs, Christmas morning magic, ballgames, practices and late night dinners…

    All come to an end.

    And you’re left hoping that you did enough right, so that when they spread their wings….

    They’ll fly…💕

    Full credit goes to Misty Brewer Lee

  • You’re Not Dad Of The Year For Posting One Photo

    Ciara Moore’s Views having gone viral and for good reasons.

    Moore said” Having a baby is all cuddles & about family until things hit the fan with your child’s father and he up and leaves. BOOM now you’re a single mother, left to do it all by yourself, while he MIGHT* ask to see the child once or twice a week and change a couple pampers a day but still gets his beauty sleep while months down the road were STILL feeling like a zombie.

    You get to sneak away once a week at night if your lucky to catch up with old friends (the two you have left 🤷‍♀️) and get SHAMED for it . You’re now a bad mum lol. While he lives his regular life with no responsibilities & drinks and hangs out every day but is still quoted “ Best Dad of the Year” JUST because he posts one simple picture with your child he took the last time he saw the kid bc in reality it’s been like a month 😂.

    You’ll sit at home after work each day with your child and be happy but still slightly alone because you are. You have a beautiful little person that you take care of but when you rest your head at night and realize “wow my phone hasn’t gone off at all …” and no ones even checked on you or offered to bring you a bite to eat to catch up or ANYTHING small just to make you feel a little less lonely … that’s when reality hits you. And you even start to blame yourself bc now your child is either being raised in a split family , has a revolving door of a father OR no father at all.

    I guess that’s a part of growing up is realizing it’s not all that people make it out to be. A picture says a thousand words BUT there’s a thousand more behind it. Dads can drink their feelings away while we have no choice but to face them and pick ourselves back up each day for our child. Especially dealing with some** of the things above or seeing people** i know deal with it .. it’s SAD . But exactly why I admire women/ mothers . We cry all we want but that’s a sign of strength. Somehow we ALWAYS pull through. #notalldadsarethesame !!#dontarguewithme#momsareamazing 👩‍👧👩‍👦

  • Raising Girls Is Never Easy But Now I Am In The Thick Of It

     

    When I was a little girl and my imagination would think to the future, of being a mum, having a family, everything being perfect.  The sun would be shining, my family would be full of smiles and giggles and we would all skip through fields holding hands as if from a scene from Little House on the Prairie.

    In reality it could not be more different.  I have two daughters fairly close in age, both with completely different characters.  In the beginning they were best of friends.  Whatever the older one did the other would follow.  If they older one asked the younger to do something she would do it without question. There was even a point were I would dress them the same, which they never complained.  At this point I thought they would always be best of friends and there would never be a quibble between them. They would become teenagers. young woman and share clothes and make up. They would go out together and giggle away at girlie gossip.

    I am not sure as to what point this changed or the exact timing of it but my sweet, loving companions are now constantly at war.  One is a teenager and maturing before my eyes. Going from a girl into a woman and blossoming.  I look at her with envy often and wish that I looked as she does when I was 13. I am so proud of her, she is intelligent, articulate and has such a caring heart.  The other is pre teen and her blossoming is only just beginning.  Proud is not enough of a word to describe how I feel about her.  She is the strong one.  For two girls who when little were like mirror images of each other they are now so different.  This is where I feel I am in a huge hole and desperately trying to scrape my way back to the top.

    I have read over the years that raising girls is never easy and now I am in the thick of it, I 100% agree. Never seeming to get anything right for them.  I always had this illusion that I would be seen as the cool mum, be friends with my kids. I can honestly say anyone who achieves this is either extremely laid back or a genius.  I am told get past the teenage years and this will come but right now that seems a mammoth task.

    My girls bicker from morning until night, they argue over the most trivial things.  It is a constant battle of wills.  Due to a recent house move and renovations the girls are currently sharing a room.  Stupid me, thinking this would be great for them. For them to be close again, have each others company. How wrong I was, instead I wonder which one is going to throttle the other one first. The looks they can give each other would turn anyone to stone. Medusa doesn’t have a look in.

    I try so hard to be fair. Try to listen to each others side of things when a disagreement erupts.  Not wanting to favour one over the other but no matter how many parenting books I have read or programs I have watched nothing prepares you for being in the moment when your two daughters want you to side with either one of them and for you to spit venom at the other just because she has pinched one of her nail polishes.  Then there is the surreal moments when things get so heated and discipline in the strongest form is required.  Voices are raised and I put my foot down then at a flip of a coin they side with each other.  “Mum don’t shout at her”  I can only describe it like being on a playground roundabout and being pushed so fast that when you come off you are still in a spin.  Confusion seems to last for several minutes after.

    My girls are absolutely at the love/hate relationship stage.  I know without a shadow of a doubt that neither would ever see any harm come to the other.  Sibling protection will always be there with them that I know but right now this hole I am in, with my efforts to both, keep the peace between them and myself is not getting any easier to climb out.  Now when I think to the future I hope and pray that my girls get through this and once again become the close friends they once were.

    Credit Louise Smith

     

     

     

  • Family Where Mum Is Dad, Dad Is Mum And 4-Year-Old Son Gender Neutral

    Family Where Mum Is Dad, Dad Is Mum And 4-Year-Old Son Gender Neutral
    Family Where Mum Is Dad, Dad Is Mum And 4-Year-Old Son Gender Neutral


    British couple Nikki and Louise Draven are one of Britain’s first families to raise their child, Star Cloud, in a completely gender fluid environment. Louise (Star’s Mum) was born as a man and is currently undergoing hormone therapy to successfully transition into a woman. Nikki (Star’s Dad) identifies as both male or female, and transitions between genders on a day-by-day basis.

    Both parents wish to raise Star in an environment that is neutral and fluid, straying from traditional gender roles. They allow Star to choose whatever clothing and toys he wants, or wear any colours he likes.
    Nikki and Louise met at an LGBT meet-up in 2011 and found that they shared very similar views about family and gender. The two of them wish to provide Star with the freedom of choice they wished they had while growing up in their homes. They want Star to be able to choose his own gender when he is older.

    Louise and Nikki want to raise Star in as ordinary a home as possible, but neither of them put much stock into gender roles defined by society.

    Family Where Mum Is Dad, Dad Is Mum And 4-Year-Old Son Gender Neutral
    Family Where Mum Is Dad, Dad Is Mum And 4-Year-Old Son Gender Neutral


    Star is like any ordinary kid, but instead of playing with only cars or trucks, Star also enjoys playing with dolls and barbies.

    Family Where Mum Is Dad, Dad Is Mum And 4-Year-Old Son Gender Neutral
    Family Where Mum Is Dad, Dad Is Mum And 4-Year-Old Son Gender Neutral

    Faced with challenges, the other children in Star’s nursery tell him that he can’t play with dolls because they are for girls, but Louise and Nikki carefully explain that Star is free to play with whatever he enjoys.

    Family Where Mum Is Dad, Dad Is Mum And 4-Year-Old Son Gender Neutral
    Family Where Mum Is Dad, Dad Is Mum And 4-Year-Old Son Gender Neutral


    Star will be attending school soon, which will require him to wear a boy’s uniform, but he gets to wear a pink vest and socks: his favorite color.

    Family Where Mum Is Dad, Dad Is Mum And 4-Year-Old Son Gender Neutral
    Family Where Mum Is Dad, Dad Is Mum And 4-Year-Old Son Gender Neutral


    When addressing Star in their home, Louise and Nikki use ‘him’ and ‘his’ but don’t put too much emphasis on the words.

    Family Where Mum Is Dad, Dad Is Mum And 4-Year-Old Son Gender Neutral
    Family Where Mum Is Dad, Dad Is Mum And 4-Year-Old Son Gender Neutral


    Nikki and Louise want to make it very clear that Star is allowed to wear makeup, put on a dress or even paint his nails if he wishes.

    Star knows that he is a boy, but Nikki and Louise want him to know that they don’t want to put limitations on his gender in any way.

    The couple has had multiple run-ins with bullying and public criticism, but remain hopeful that others will keep an open mind about their family

    Family Where Mum Is Dad, Dad Is Mum And 4-Year-Old Son Gender Neutral
    Family Where Mum Is Dad, Dad Is Mum And 4-Year-Old Son Gender Neutral

     

  • How Are You Raising 4 Kids

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