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  • Biff And Chip On Home Schooling

    This is Biff.

    This is Chip.

    This is Biff and Chip’s homework.

    Biff and Chip are required to write down ten examples of fronted adverbials.

    Biff and Chip have not a fucking clue what a fronted adverbial is.

    This is Mum.

    Mum has not a fucking clue what a fronted adverbial is either.

    “We don’t know what a fronted adverbial is,” whinge Biff and Chip. “This homework is impossible. You will have to help us.”

    “It’s not my homework, it’s your homework,” says Mum, thanking her lucky stars that she did not have to engage in any of this fronted adverbial bollocks when she was at school.

    This is Dad.

    Dad still struggles to distinguish between a noun and a verb, and would not know a fronted adverbial if one came up and punched him in the face.

    Biff and Chip think for a moment about asking Dad for help.

    They decide to Google instead.

    This is Mrs May.

    When Mrs May went into teaching she honestly believed she would be able to spend her time helping children to love learning. And putting on plays. Mrs May loves a play. She did not realise that a love of learning would not feature on the National Curriculum at all, and that she would instead be forced to meet a series of impossible and continuously moving goalposts which successive governments would put in place, and have to teach her classes about ridiculous concepts such as fronted adverbials which, in all honesty, are only ever likely to be of use if they end up becoming professors of linguistics. Or primary school teachers.

    If truth be told, Mrs May has not a fucking clue what a fronted adverbial is either.

    This is Floppy the dog.

    Floppy holds no truck with fronted adverbials.

    Floppy eats the fronted adverbial homework sheet.

    Floppy knows that he is a fucking liability, and waits to be told so.

    No one is more surprised than Floppy when the entire family gather around and tell him “Oh GOOD dog Floppy.”

    Floppy feels this is proof positive that some good can come from fronted adverbials after all.

    Later at school, Biff and Chip are, for the first time, able to legitimately use the excuse: “My dog ate my homework.”

    Mrs May breathes a secret sigh of relief that that is one less set of incomprehensible and entirely incorrect homework that she has to plough through, and suggests to the class that they will all put on a play instead to celebrate.

    Hang in there homeschoolers 🤣🤣

  • A Silent Tragedy In How We Are Raising Our Children

    A Silent Tragedy In How We Are Raising Our Children

    A SILENT TRAGEDY

    There is a silent tragedy that is unfolding today in our homes and concerns our most precious jewels: our children.

    Our children are in a devastating emotional state! In the last 15 years, researchers have given us increasingly alarming statistics on a sharp and steady increase in childhood mental illness that is now reaching epidemic proportions:

    Statistics do not lie:

    • 1 in 5 children have mental health problems

    • A 43% increase in diagnosed ADHD

    • A 37% increase in adolescent depression has been noted

    • There has been a 200% increase in the suicide rate in children aged 10 to 14

    What is happening and what are we doing wrong?

    Today’s children are being over-stimulated and over-gifted with material objects, but they are deprived of the fundamentals of a healthy childhood, such as:

    • Emotionally available parents

    • Clearly defined limits

    • Responsibilities

    • Balanced nutrition and adequate sleep

    • Movement in general but especially outdoors

    • Creative play, social interaction, unstructured game opportunities and boredom spaces

    Instead, in recent years, children have been filled with:

    • Digitally distracted parents

    • Indulgent and permissive parents who let children “rule the world” and whoever sets the rules

    • A sense of right, of deserving everything without earning it or being responsible for obtaining it

    • Inadequate sleep and unbalanced nutrition

    • A sedentary lifestyle

    • Endless stimulation, technological nannies, instant gratification and absence of boring moments

    What to do?

    If we want our children to be happy and healthy individuals, we have to wake up and get back to basics. It is still possible! Many families see immediate improvements after weeks of implementing the following recommendations:

    • Set limits and remember that you are the captain of the ship. Your children will feel more confident knowing that you have control of the helm.

    • Offer children a balanced lifestyle full of what children NEED, not just what they WANT. Don’t be afraid to say “no” to your children if what they want is not what they need.

    • Provide nutritious food and limit junk food.

    • Spend at least one hour a day outdoors doing activities such as cycling, walking, fishing, bird/insect watching

    • Enjoy a daily family dinner without smartphones or distracting technology, let everyone feel valued

    • Play board games as a family or if children are very small for board games, just let the pretend to play it

    • Involve your children in some homework or household chores according to their age (folding clothes, hanging clothes, unpacking food, setting the table, feeding the dog, etc.)

    • Implement a consistent sleep routine to ensure your child gets enough sleep. The schedules will be even more important for school-age children.

    • Teach responsibility and independence. Do not overprotect them against all frustration or mistakes. Misunderstanding will help them build resilience and learn to overcome life’s challenges,

    • Do not carry your children’s backpack, do not carry the homework they forgot, do not peel bananas or peel oranges if they can do it on their own (4-5 years). Instead of giving them the fish, teach them to fish.

    • Teach them to wait and delay gratification.

    • Provide opportunities for “boredom”, since boredom is the moment when creativity awakens. Do not feel responsible for always keeping children entertained.

    • Do not use technology as a cure for boredom, nor offer it at the first second of inactivity.

    • Avoid using technology during meals, in cars, restaurants, shopping centers. Use these moments as opportunities to socialize by training the brains to know how to work when they are in mode: “boredom”

    • Help them create a “bottle of boredom” with activity ideas for when they are bored.

    • Be emotionally available to connect with children and teach them self-regulation and social skills:

    • Turn off the phones at night when children have to go to bed to avoid digital distractions.

    • Become a regulator or emotional trainer for your children. Teach them to recognize and manage their own frustrations and anger.

    • Teach them to greet, to take turns, to share without running out of anything, to say thank you and please, to acknowledge the error and apologize (do not force them), be a model of all those values you instill.

    • Connect emotionally – smile, hug, kiss, tickle, read, dance, jump, play or crawl with them.

    I thank you if you share it.

    Article written by Dr. Luis Rojas Marcos Psychiatrist.

    https://m.facebook.com/story.php?story_fbid=669567043510720&id=653944098406348

    The photo is from Deborah Emotional Therapy

    https://www.facebook.com/deborahterapiaemocional/

     

  • Things I Wish I Had Known When My Son Was Diagnosed With Autism

    THINGS I WISH I HAD KNOWN WHEN MY SON WAS FIRST DIAGNOSED WITH AUTISM:

    To tackle guilt from the very beginning.

    To focus on self-care earlier on.

    To make finding peace a priority.

    To not judge my beginnings so harshly.

    To focus on the good more, even when it was hardest to find.

    To stand up for myself sooner.

    To realize that the child I have right now is not the child I will have a year from now.

    To stop worrying so much about my child. He will be okay because I will make his life okay.

    To acknowledge that the goal is not to turn an autistic person into a non-autistic person. The goal is to help an autistic person who struggles, become an autistic person who doesn’t struggle.

    That very few people will understand our lives, and that’s okay.

    That the biggest critics and givers of advice, know nothing of our struggles.

    To choose my battles carefully.

    That it’s not a race against time. Our kids are lifelong learners.

    That I am learning too and to give myself some grace.

    To not follow blindly when it comes to my son, we are on our own path.

    That this can be a very lonely and isolating journey and to look for the helpers.

    To spend less time researching how to help my son and instead spend more time playing and interacting with him.

    That wanting to give up at times makes you human but refusing to do so makes you a parent.

    That I will love this child more than I ever thought humanly possible.

    And finally, that I am the lucky one.

    Photo Credit: Kacie K Photography

    Credit. https://www.facebook.com/findingcoopersvoice/

     

  • Here’s Why Good Teachers Are Leaving Their Professions

    The filter comes off now.

    .

    I think it’s easier for people to believe that I left teaching because of the lousy pay. It was easier for my former HR director to believe it was because I found something that I was more passionate about. Some would allow them to assume that… let them be comfortable in their assumptions because your truth may lead to discomfort of others. Well… I’m not some. That ain’t me!!!

    .

    Let me tell you why those who ooze passion for teaching are leaving the occupation like their hair is on fire…

    .

    1. The old excuse “the kids have changed”. No. No friggin way. Kids are kids. PARENTING has changed. SOCIETY has changed. The kids are just the innocent victims of that. Parents are working crazy hours, consumed by their devices, leaving kids in unstable parenting/coparenting situations, terrible media influences… and we are going to give the excuse that the KIDS have changed?

    What did we expect them to do? Kids behave in undesirable ways in the environment they feel safest. They test the water in the environment that they know their mistakes and behaviors will be treated with kindness and compassion. For those “well behaved” kids–they’re throwing normal kid tantrums at home because it’s safe. The kids flipping tables at school? They don’t have a safe place at home. Our classrooms are the first place they’ve ever heard ‘no’, been given boundaries, shown love through respect. Cue “the kids have changed”

    .

    2. In the midst of all of this… our response is we need to be “21st Century” schools. 1 to 1 student to technology. Oh. Okay. So forget the basics of relationship building and hands on learning. Kids already can’t read social cues and conduct themselves appropriately in social settings… let’s toss more devices at them because it looks good on our website. During an interview, one division asked me “how are you with technology? That’s important to us”. Uhhh… I hear Bobo the chimpanzee is pretty tech savvy… I consider myself pretty great with kids.

    .

    3. And since our technology approach doesn’t seem to be working, teachers must need more training. So take away two planning periods a week. And render that time utterly worthless when it comes to ADDING to the quality of the instruction. Just this year, a new math assessment was introduced for K teachers. We had to attend a training on a school day (time missed with students) then it took us THREE WEEKS to administer it… one on one… to 21 students. Such. A. Waste. All of the info I could have told you about them without taking away from precious instructional time.

    .

    4. Instead of holding parents accountable… and making them true partners, we’ve adopted a customer service mindset. I’ve seen the Facebook rants about attendance and getting “the letter”. Well, here’s the thing… I can’t teach your child if he’s not in school 🤷‍♀️. I was cussed out by parents who wanted to attend field trips but missed the THREE notes that went home–and when they did attend a trip, sat on their phone the entire time. I’ve had parents stand me up multiple times on Conference Days then call to tattle on me when I refused to offer an after school option. I’ve had parents tell me that I’m not allowed to tell their child ‘no’…

    .

    5. My mental and physical health was in jeopardy every.single.day. Knowing that your kids need and deserve more than they’re getting. Sitting in one meeting after another, begging for more support, only to be told ‘don’t lose sleep over them’… when you LOVE your kids and are PASSIONATE about your mission… these messages tear you apart. Watching them come in… dirty clothes… chaos at home… and knowing they need more than you can give them in a classroom of 21, with less and less support, multple languages spoken, several different disabilities… it breaks you. We become emotional eaters. We become couch potatoes to zone out. We become so short fused that our families suffer.

    .

    So… that’s why.

    .

    I finally realized… you can’t save them all. You can’t even help 21 if you aren’t healthy yourself. If your mental and physical health aren’t a focus, you aren’t even good for the 21.

    .

    I left my retirement fund… my paid sick leave (46 days left on the table, unpaid). I didn’t leave for better pay.

    .

    I decided to start with my 1 at home… and work to help other mommas be able to show up for their ones at home. Because… I really do believe it starts there ❤ I found something that allows me to impact the environments that those 21 go home to. I found something that I can make an impact with… that doesn’t leave my tank empty, rendering me useless for others.

    .

    I may have left the classroom… but I am still advocating for those kiddos. It just looks different now

    Credit. https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=7821126

     

  • the more i learn about people … 2

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  • Before Your Child Goes Back To School Show Them This

    This summer holiday you will buy new school uniforms, neatly pack their book bags or back pack, polish their shoes but are you doing the most important thing?

     There is one thing far more important than a freshly ironed uniform and a fresh hair cut that you can do for your child.

    Give them a  tube of toothpaste and asked them to squeeze it out on to a plate or bowl. When they have emptied the whole tube, ask them to put all the toothpaste back in the tube. When they complain and moan that it is impossible

    Say to them “You will remember this plate of toothpaste for the rest of your life. Your words have the power of life or death as you go to school, you are about to see just how much weight your words carry. You are going to have the opportunity to use your words to hurt, demean, slander and wound others. You are also going to have the opportunity to use your words to heal, encourage, inspire and love others. You will occasionally make the wrong choice; I can think of three times this week I have used my own words carelessly and caused harm.

    Just like this toothpaste, once the words leave your mouth, you can’t take them back. Use your words carefully. When others are misusing their words, guard your words. Make the choice every morning that life-giving words will come out of your mouth. Decide tonight that you are going to be a life-giver in school. Be known for your gentleness and compassion. Use your life to give life to a world that so desperately needs it. You will never, ever regret choosing kindness.”

    Adapted from Amy Beth Gardner’s post full credit is still given to Gardner

    Mums advice ltd

  • Your Child’s Behaviour Is Down To You

    I have notice so many people talk about how their children behave badly and they are the “problem”. Have you ever sat back and thought where they have learnt this behaviour, why they may be acting out, ask yourself this, are you happy all the time? Do you sometimes feel grumpy or angry for no reason? Of course you do, you are human so why do you expect your children to behave perfectly all of the time or to smile when they are sad. 

    And quite frankly THEY ARE KIDS!!! They don’t know how to handle their emotions, or even how to grasp certain situations, they are learning, they may feel over whelmed or not know how to express how or why they are feeling a certain way at that point in time.

    Let’s take a moment and look at our situations and think, how am I making these kids feel? How is my own emotions and the way I handle said emotions leading example to these kids, am I giving my child room to breathe and teaching them about their emotions or am I trying to repress them and stop the feeling.

    We must not ask our children to change how they feel, if they do not feel comfortable kissing Auntie Edna then they should not be forced to, if they don’t feel like dancing don’t make them, if you want them to hold your hand to safely cross the road then you enforce it, children should only be made to do things which is positive or healthy for them, pretending that they are happy is only beneficial for you not them.

    We must teach our children and sometimes even ourselves how to constructively express their feelings in positive ways.

    We must teach ourselves it is ok for our children to be sad or angry sometimes, we must look at how we speak to our children because this can become their inner voice, we also must remember no one is perfect and behaves perfectly all the time.

  • I’m Not The Mum That Watches My Kids

    I’m not the Mum that watches my kids 24/7, I often watch from a distance with my feet up and a glass of wine in my hand, they don’t need me with them every second of the day.

    I’m the mom that yells up the stairs ” you better pack it in before I lose my shit and whack you sideways”. ( before you perfect parents jump on me it is perfectly acceptable in my eyes to threaten to physically harm them, I have never actually raised a hand to them).

    I’m also the Mum that waits for the real cry before going across the house to see what’s up ( I can tell when it is a whiney fake attention seeking cry to the shit I’m bleeding type of cry) . I’ll come for you being hurt but I don’t wanna come because your brother has the plastic cup you want. Figure that shit out on your own.

    I’m the mum who won’t rush across the park to scoop you up when you have had a little tumble, unless there is blood, a bone sticking out of your body or a serious injury, my kids are tough they ain’t no snowflake, they cry when they are hurt not when they have tripped.

    Stop raising incapable kids because they turn into incapable adults, stop following them everywhere, put the anti bacteria gel away, give them space to grow and learn, christ when we were growing up our mum would spit on our wounds and use her sleeve to wipe away the blood, our mums gave us the freedom to grow and learn.

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  • Lazy Parents Are The Best Type Of Parents

    Lazy parents are the best So I’ve been called a lazy parent because I do very little in and around the house, but I do I really do you just can’t see it.

    I don’t wash up like EVER, my children do, they have learnt how to delegate who does what, one washing, one drying and one putting away. I don’t work out my bills my 12 year old does our household budget, he’s learnt so much and can ensure we have enough money to cover everything, I have kids who switch off lights and don’t keep the tap running when brushing their teeth.

    The kids work out the meal plan for the week and help write the shopping list, they have learnt about needs and wants, healthy and unhealthy and how a balanced and tasty diet doesn’t need to cost a fortune.

    My kids can change beds, they can fix the wi-fi when it stops working, add screen wash into the car, use a washing machine, run a Hoover and balance a bank account.

    So all this makes me lazy does it? Actually I think it makes me a pretty good parent, one day my children will move out and they will be able to run a home, surely it is my role as their mum to teach them more than just maths and English. Let’s face it how often do we use algebra in our day-to-day life, why are we so quick to do for our kids and not teaching them life skills.

    I work hard teaching my children but you can call it lazy if you like. Before anyone jumps on me, my children are enjoying their childhoods their tasks take very little time, they play football, go horse riding and play the awful game fortnite, splash in the pool and are normal well-rounded happy kids plus their mum is always happy and ready to play or go on little outings as I am not exhausted or stressed out and neither are my kids.

  • Can We Learn About Taxes Please

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