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Tag: disability

  • @sportbaby1 God bless them#disabled #disability #life #mom #fyp #foryou #foryoup…

    @sportbaby1 God bless them#disabled #disability #life #mom #fyp #foryou #foryoup…

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    @sportbaby1

    God bless them❤️❤️🙏🙏#disabled #disability #life #mom #fyp #foryou #foryoupage

    ♬ Love Is Gone (feat. Dylan Matthew) (Acoustic) – SLANDER, Dylan Matthew
    https://www.tiktok.com/@sportbaby1/video/7280316131997519147
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    Tiktok by Evelyn

  • At Least He Doesn’t…

    “At least he doesn’t. . .”

    *

    When you “at least” me as a complex parent.

    I feel minimized.

    I feel shut up.

    I feel shut down.

    I feel unheard.

    I feel compared.

    I feel invalidated.

    *

    I don’t let very many people into our lives, at least not in person. Mostly because I’m spent. I’ve been spent for a darn long time. And one of the reasons I’m spent is because of things like “at least”.

    I know people mean well, I give them the benefit of the doubt. And I also realize that the person in front of me is not responsible for all of the “at least”s that have gone before them.

    But each one takes a little slice out of me, and those slices don’t exactly fill right back in.

    I started feeling pretty hollow after awhile.

    I *know* things could be worse. Oh boy do I know.

    I know some other people’s battles are big and hard, and believe me, I feel for them.

    And yet.

    None of us is participating for a trophy.

    None of us looks at other familes’ situations and line us up in descending order of easiest to hardest in order to keep track.

    No two families have the same dynamics nor the same ability to cope.

    *

    If someone is trying to push a car up a hill do you say “at least it’s not a minivan”?

    If someone is running 50 miles, do you say “at least you don’t have to bike 100”?

    If someone is clinging to a rope by their fingertips, do you say “at least you aren’t clinging to a chain”?

    *

    If a person gives you a glimpse of their challenges, whether it’s parenting or otherwise, honour their experience. Validate them. Meet them where they are.

    If you can’t think of anything else to say, “can I get you coffee or tea?” Always works.

    Credit. https://www.facebook.com/writingrunningmom/

  • A Story About The Cost Of Disability Told Through The Tale Of Two Pairs Of Shoes

    A story about the cost of Disability told through the tale of two pairs of shoes.

    Once upon a time there were 2 brothers who needed black shoes for school.

    ”Come on Mummy, let’s go to Asda” said the younger brother, so off they walked to Asda returning with a pair of Batman light up black shoes for £13.

    The older brother needed something a bit different as his toes often curled up and regular shoes with curled up toes were painful. They wheeled off to the shops and returned empty handed.

    So they went online and found the perfect shoe in America with a zipper that opened up the whole shoe meaning no more curled up toes. Mummy paid the £59.62 for the shoes, £1.78 foreign exchange transaction fee, £0.50 foreign transaction purchase fee and the £18.55 Customs charge, making a total of £80.45.

    And then both boys had comfy, smart shoes for school and Mummy was grateful for Disability Living Allowance because things that are a little bit different cost an enormous amount more.

    *Post made public for sharing*

    Written by Emily Hudson

     

  • Tonight I Cried With Him, He Didn’t Ask To Be Autistic

    Tonight, I cried with him…

    To the lady in the bathroom:

    Know that words hurt.. They ran deep to my soul tonight.. Why? I’m not sure as I’m usually this “strong person” and can “handle anything”, but tonight, your words hurt..

    ::Back Story::

    Tonight was Tatum’s last night of swimming lessons. As a treat, they always let the kids jump off the diving boards if they want. So, after many jumps off the edge, Tatum FINALLY jumped off the board.. ALL.BY.HIMSELF.. This was HUGE as this is something he typically would be wayyy to scared to do. Unfortunately, because he jumped off the side for way to long, he only got a few rounds of the diving board before class was over.

    He was mad. He kicked. He screamed. He yelled. He bawled.

    I tried calming him down in the pool, however, he wasn’t having it. So we got out.

    He was mad. He kicked. He screamed. He yelled. He bawled, all the way into the shower room where we got dressed. I was trying –everything– in my will power to calm him down. I couldn’t do it.

    This.Is.Autism…

    20 minutes go by with NO behavior change. He was still mad. He was still kicking and screaming at the top of his lungs. I just kept saying, “Tatum, you need to calm down!”

    Finally, a moment where he listened to me as I calmly said in a low voice, “Tatum, you need to calm down and listen to Mommy”…

    In this moment of calm, I overheard a Mom say to another Mom, “Glad that’s not my kid, I’d beat his ass.” <—- and that my friends is when I started bawling…

    You see, I didn’t “intend” for my child to get this disability. It is a struggle every.single.day.. He doesn’t know “calm”.. He fights until he no longer physically can. Somedays that’s 20 minutes, somedays that’s an hour.. And multiple times a day at that.. I wish I could help him, but I can’t….

    But, let me tell you what…. Joining in his world of chaos and “beating his ass” won’t make it any better.

    I cried with you tonight Tatum. Mama can only be so strong. People can be so rude. Especially people who have never dealt with a disability.

    So.. After calming down, on both our parts, I asked Tatum if he was ready to go home for the night.. He gave me a kiss on the forehead and said, “Tatum naughty, sorry Mommy!”

    You are NOT naughty little boy. We will learn how to calm down in stressful situations one way or another.. It will take us several tries to see what way works best for us, but I promise, we will figure it out. Don’t EVER think you are “naughty” for not knowing how to be calm.

    And to the woman in the bathroom, I pray for you. I pray that you NEVER have a child with a disability. I pray that you know how to calm your babies each and everyday in every situation. I pray that your babies never act out in public.. But most of all, I pray that you think of my little boy tonight. I pray that God shows you how much you hurt me. I am strong for my little man, but tonight I wasn’t, and that’s because of your hurtful words. He saw my pain, he saw my weakness, and I’m NOT ok with that. I am his rock. I am supposed to remain calm while he’s not. And I wish you would have to and kept your words to yourself.

    ::Remember::

    We all have hearts, and we all have feelings. Even the “strongest” of us get hurt

    Credit https://www.facebook.com/erica.davis.9212301

     

  • PIP Payment Is Going To Kill Me

    Well the government have done brilliantly on this decision to make everyone who receives pip (personal independent payment ) local government have decided if you are entitled to enhanced rates they will be taking £9 this year towards your care package plus what ever else they decide.

    For example they asked me to contribute £12.56 Jan 2019, in April 2019 they said no you don’t pay enough so it’s going up to £17.56 but just had a letter informing me that I now have to pay from July 22nd 2019 £50.06 all of these amounts are weekly so my choice is eat once a day and die quicker because I won’t survive without the help.

    I have complexed disabilities which I pay for lots of extras on top of normal utility bills etc I live alone so single income of employment support allowance and personal independence payments housing benefit and council tax support but I also get bedroom taxed and pay towards my council tax I am in a mess and no appeals can be made about the amount I have to pay even though it states on the letter if you have extra payments for items you can ask for it to be taken into account.

    They were called today and they stated no appeals but the letter states different so confused fed up scared not looking forward to the future I already have a rare lung disease which is not treatable only manageable but it is progressive so nobody knows how long I have or what the future holds I have been in intensive care 4 times this year so far it’s disgusting making disabled feel responsible for the cost to each local government

    Credit https://www.facebook.com/lisamcharman

     

  • Dear Teacher I’m Sorry You Missed Out On My Awesome Kid

    After a tough year. I wrote this.

    Dear Teacher

    I have heard your complaints, how my child has been bossy.

    I have heard you say he did not follow your exact directions.

    I have heard you say he wrote his name on a ruler.

    I have heard you say he takes some things to the extreme.

    I have heard every single one of your complaints.

    I have heard you tell me he is below grade level.

    I have heard you tell me he is taking advantage of his IEP accommodations.

    I have heard the list of members around the table at every IEP meeting yet it all seems a blur when it is over.

    I have also heard the doctor say he may not be successful in life.

    I have heard a list of diagnoses including Autism, hypotonia, Epilepsy, Dyslexia, Chromosomal abnormalities and even more.

    I have heard him cry at night that he has no friends.

    I have heard him tell me that even you think he is dumb.

    I have heard him tell me that he is too nervous to go to school.

    I have heard him cry over homework at 9pm, because he was at various therapies right after school. All because you told him it must be done, you will check, even though we talked about evening therapies multiple times.

    What I have not heard is one positive thing about my child this year.

    I am sorry that even though you had him for 180 days you missed the amazing child behind those diagnosis’s, you missed the heart behind it.

    While that ultimately made our year really tough, you are the one who missed out on an amazing kid. Not all disabilities show on the outside and that is the case with my child. You missed out this time, I hope not next time. Please remember that positive words go farther than negativity. Your students and families see your eye rolls. If it is hard for you, imagine how it is for us. How would you feel if it was your child? We feel your annoyance, it really hurts. I will not apologize because I am not sorry for my child they are working with what they were given. You are there to guide them, help them and be there when they need it. Remember dear teacher, if all kids were the same this world would be pretty boring. I know he will do great things because he is capable of things you never seen possible.

    Signed,

    The parent of the kid you missed out on

    Credit https://www.facebook.com/amanda.sullivan.790693

  • Shocking Treatment By RyanAir To Disabled Boy

    HE’S FINALLY ON THE PLANE! This is my son Leo he is 15 he has severe autism and the mental capacity of a 3 year old.. who tonight Ryanair refused to let fly home because he was distressed when they wouldn’t let him have his doll and demanded payment for it as hand luggage.

    Police were called and 4/5 of them surrounded him at Alicante airport .. they physically touched him without his awareness and his doll which caused his meltdown. If they had any autism awareness they would have known this would always escalate to a meltdown.

    Special assistance had been requested as not all disabilities are visible but we were told no by Ryanair because Leo can walk. He had to be then taken to the airport Doctor and medicated as he was so distressed. Ryanair off loaded the luggage and offered them no other way to get home, shrugging shoulders saying no flights til next Tuesday. In desperation his carer went to the Jet2 desk to beg for help and they were outstanding ..

    Anna and Mark were outstanding ground Jet2 staff .. they stayed with Leo from when they bought new tickets at the desk and have been sat on the floor with him as he was so frightened to board the plane trying to calm and reassure him. He was in a wheelchair at this point due to them medicating him.

    The other lady in the photos is Ellie and she is Jet2 cabin crew .. sat on the floor calming him and she is putting his babies to bed for him and talking to him, which will keep him calm .. she was amazing ..

    This plastic doll item she has on her knee is what RYANAIR wanted to charge for and take off him, his carer had NOT even refused the payment! At the time of boarding he didn’t even have all these dolls they were bought after the event to help calm him before trying to get him on the jet2 flight. What is even more unbelievable the carer was wearing the recognised Lanyard which is used to alert airport staff to a non visible disability!!

    Jet 2 I cannot thankyou enough for getting my disabled vulnerable boy home .. and treating him with kindness .. dignity and respect, and most of all time .. autistic children need extra processing time .. not spanish Police threatening him with injections! The ignorant actions of Ryanair and ground staff escalated this situation. Even the Jet2 Captain came to check on Leo’s wellbeing .. and a special thankyou to the kind gentleman who was travelling with his daughters who offered much appreciated assistance.

    Please accept my thanks from the bottom of my heart. I will not be patronising this airline again .. in my opinion they are driven by utter greed and in this instance void of humanity, and I intend to follow-up this incident.

    Please please everyone share this for me, I would be so grateful and really want to show the level of compassion and outstanding customer service Jet2 have shown 💖

    Credit Helen Estella

  • This Note Broke Me, Not All Disabilities Are Visable

    To the person who put this on my car which I had put my disabled badge fully on show I’m not angry at your pure ignorance I’m actually upset with it. How dare you ever accuse anyone of not needing a disabled badge without knowing.

    I wish you had the balls to say this to my face and I would have told you (even though I don’t need to explain myself to the likes of you) but id of happily said why I have a badge.

    I promise to get the stigma away from people with disabled badges who don’t “look disabled” I hope this gets shared and back to you and you will see my son is terminally ill he’s had over 15 operations 3 open hearts, 2 stomach, lung and diaphragm and countless artery stenting operations and spent half his life on intensive care.

    He’s had 2 strokes and was paralysed, brain-damaged and has a spine and hip condition aswell as a massive heart condition. The reason I didn’t get his wheelchair out was because I was running late because my son who had a MRI scan CTSCAN and a dye for heart function yesterday only got discharged late and was back in this morning so carried him in.

    But for your information not everyone who holds a blue badge needs to have a wheelchair! I’ve told Alder hey security and broke down, I’ve sat through things nobody should see but why did your note break me? Because it’s your pure ignorance towards others I’m a single mum trying my best to hold it together for my son who’s in and out of hospital. NOT ALL DISABILITIES ARE VISABLE and I hope you regret doing this and learn your lesson!

    I knew something would be said one day as everyday I get looks and stares and see people whispering to each other about me and bobby walking from the car. Everyone needs to stop and think before acting I hardly ever let anything upset me but this did. How aggressive aswell and as for conning my son’s disabled pass is not a con he’s actually seriously ill. I’ve added a picture of him to prove not everyone looks ill or disabled but can be seriously ill.

    This Note Broke Me, Not All Disabilities Are Visable
    This Note Broke Me, Not All Disabilities Are Visable

    I’d like to point out this has nothing to do with the hospital itself they was lovely with me when I was upset and they treat us with every respect always have for 3 long years with them. They’ve saved my son’s life many times it’s just somebody who was parked on the car park.

    Credit Emma Doherty

  • Government Screwing Over The Disabled

    A man named Vince Paul Rodgers took to Facebook to express his upset and disgust with his wives disability payments being stopped.

    Rodgers said:

    *Please share the life out of this*

    To all who know me and know my wife Julie, the Government have in their wisdom taken Julie off her employment and support allowance due to an oversight on my behalf and now has been given her P45 to start looking for a job/work. 
    Julie is a tetraplegic due to hypoxic brain damage and can’t do anything for herself. Julie will be attending the job centre on Monday morning after the miracle worker has been and rid her of her disabilities.

    * for some who are wondering what my oversight was it is as follows………… I received the letter asking for Julie to attend an interview……….I put that letter in a safe place and on the morning of the interview I forgot all about it, I received a letter to explain why she didn’t attend, so I told the truth and said that I had forgotten, they sent out a reply stating that they were not accepting my reason and removed Julie from her benefit, I appealed for the decision to be changed and a new interview to take place, yesterday I received there reply that they were sticking to the original decision and removed Julies benefits. *
    * update – update – update *

    Julie and I attended the Job Centre this morning with a reporter Rochelle Hughes from Selby Times, I take my hat off to the staff and manager at Selby job centre after seeing Julie was unfit for work they managed to get in touch with the DWP to resolve the matter in hand, in a nutshell they have reinstated Julies benefits, but Julie still has to do a face to face interview/Assessment with the powers to be to see if she’s still able to work 😳😳😳, awaiting the appointment letter now.