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Tag: coming out

  • Out Of The Closet, I Have Something To Tell You

    Out of the closet

    Hey Mum, I have something to tell you,

    “What dear” she turns and replies,

    I freak as I don’t know what to say,

    So I feed her some more lies.

    It’s hard to tell your parents,

    It’s hard to tell your friends,

    So you pretend your normal to everyone,

    You don’t want your relationship to end.

    But 30 years later,

    And your secret is still unknown,

    All the times you could have said,

    So your still in this on your own.

    You decide to pluck the courage,

    It’s time to face your fear,

    You hold the phone so tightly,

    Wiping away the tears.

    You dial the number slowly,

    Then press on call and wait,

    The dialling tone is ringing,

    I’ll hang up, maybe it’s to late.

    Then she answers “Hi dear”,

    You say hello back and sob,

    “What’s wrong” she asks she’s worried,

    Your heart begins to throb.

    “Mum, I’m sorry, I’m different”

    “I’m not who you want me to be”,

    She cries down the phone and whispers,

    “Your my daughter, now please tell me”

    “Ok” but now I’m hysterical,

    I say “Mum I am gay”,

    “I’ve known for years, I’m sorry”

    Then I take the phone away.

    I’m terrified of her reaction,

    Then my Dad comes on the phone,

    “Oh you silly Girl, we always knew”,

    “Now get your butt back home”

    I walked in through the door,

    They held me oh so tight,

    We wish you’d told us earlier,

    It would have been alright.

    So you see now I’m happy,

    I told all my Family,

    Some are distant, most are fine,

    But hey THIS IS ME šŸ™‚

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  • Heartbroken…… My 12 Year Old Son Is Gay

    Heartbroken. …….my son is gay

    My baby boy my youngest child is gay and yes I’m heartbroken not by the fact his gay but by how I found out .

    I’ve always known my son was never a lads lad he was never into football he liked dancing he would prefer to paint his nails and play with hair then go outside to kick a ball about .

    From such a very early age he had such good taste in clothes the outfits he would pick to wear always matched I used to joke with him you’re my little gay boy which he always replied ohh mum I’ve got a girl friend.

    I’ve always spoke to him about his feelings and we would joke about being gay never once meant in a nasty way in just a way to try to help him feel more comfortable about his sexuality and that when he decided to come out I would hope he would tell me but this is why I’m heartbroken he never came out to me I found out by his school teacher who called me and she explained to me about my 12-year-old son and that prehaps I should talk to him.

    Heartbroken...... My 12 Year Old Son Is Gay
    Heartbroken…… My 12 Year Old Son Is Gay

    So straight after the phone call I went upstairs to my son andĀ gave him a hug and told him how proud I was of him and I asked him why he didn’t tell me was it because I always joked about it his reply was “no mum it’s coz you’re proud of me and I know you would want to announce to everyone I’m gay but I would like to tell people first”

    So yes I’m heartbroken on how I found out but omg I so bloody proud of son xx

    I also am so proud of my daughter MackensieĀ who is slightly older than her brother for making him feel safe at school and showing him how truly awesome he is.

    I am blessed with two confident happy and caring children what more could a mother want? I love my Children more than life it’s self, every day they make me realise what true happiness is,Ā I wouldn’t change anything about either of them from the second they were born i discovered what true love is.

     

  • The Day I Came Out My Life Nearly Ended

    The day I came out my life nearly ended.

    I’d like to tell you my story, the story of the day I came out and my life nearly ended.

    I have always known I was different, I knew I should like men like all my friends did but I was drawn to woman, I fought and fought my urges, I tried to like boys,but I failed.

    By the time I had hit 15 I knew I could not change, it took me months and months to pluck up the courage to come out to my family.

    It was a cold February evening, I walked down the stairs and told my mum, dad and older brother I needed to speak to them and begged them to please not hate me.
    It took me a while to get the words out, I was so scared, so desperate not to disappoint them.

    When I had finally spat the words out, my family looked at me in silence, my dad was the first to speak “you areĀ disgusting, you need help”.

    These words still haunt me, but seeing my mother in tears and my brothers angry face hurt more.
    I ran to my room in tears, I eventually fell asleep in my tear stained pillow.

    Around 6am I was abruptly woken by being yanked from my bed by my legs.
    My father and my brother began raining down blows to my head and body.

    My mother was stood by my bedroom door staring and me, I begged them to stop, I pleaded with my mother for help.
    I was stripped naked and whipped, kicked, punched, spat on and the final humiliation my father took out his penis and urinated on.
    I was scum, I was a dirty lesbian.

    They finally left, I laid there naked, covered in my own blood and my fathers urine.
    Two or three hours later my mother came in and wrapped me in my bed sheet and dragged me to the car, I thought she was going to kill me, but she drove me to the hospital.
    My mother warned me not to tell them the truth or she would kill me.

    I told the hospital staff and police, I was jumped on when walking back from a friends.
    Roll on to my 16th birthday, I packed a bag and ran, I lived in and out of homeless shelters, on the streets and occasionally others would put me up.

    I was lucky in the end a charity helped me find my feet, I found work and eventually found love.
    I am 37 years old now and have never spoke with my family again.

    Ā The Day I Came Out My Life Nearly Ended but itĀ made me stronger, I found the strength to run, you can not change how you feel.
    Just because they are you family it doesn’t mean they will always have your back.
    Be strong, be brave, be you.